"What if I had died instead and left you here behind,alone in your 80s? How would you have...

"What if I had died instead and left you here behind,
alone in your 80s? How would you have lived? Would you have solved
the riddle of quantum mechanics? How would you have
remembered me? Anyway, you'd surely
have married again, one of those women
who loved you and envied me. And for long years
of Indian summer, you would drive along together and talk in the car and in bed, while my gray ashes melted silently into the earth under the tall tree
in the park. Ah, now I'm jealous.
I want to be your second wife."