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I've been keeping it nice and soft
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A Million Ways to Die in the West

I've been keeping it nice and soft. See?

I've been keeping it nice and soft. See?

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.086
I've been keeping it nice and soft
00:00:03.169 --> 00:00:04.504
See
Available in 6 languages
Duration
6 seconds
Views
21
Timestamp in Movie
01:39:56
Uploaded
Mar 10, 2026
Genres
comedy, western
Production
RGB Media,Fuzzy Door Productions,MRC,Bluegrass Films

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Movie Summary

As a cowardly farmer begins to fall for the mysterious new woman in town, he must put his newly found courage to the test when her husband, a notorious gun-slinger, announces his arrival.
Mmm! I've missed you, baby. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:29
Mmm! I've missed you, baby.
Oh, shit. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:06
Oh, shit.
Edward. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:49
Edward.
It's Clinch. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:18
It's Clinch.
He ain't here, Clinch. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:07
He ain't here, Clinch.
Stark! I know you're here, Stark! - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:10
Stark! I know you're here, Stark!
Lewis. Sometime this week, yeah? Sorry, boss. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:08
Lewis. Sometime this week, yeah? Sorry, boss.
Hey! There he goes! Boss! - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:06
Hey! There he goes! Boss!
What in the hell do we do now? - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:07
What in the hell do we do now?
Ah, Curtis. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:19
Ah, Curtis.
Okay, here we go. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:13
Okay, here we go.
Yeah this is my first vaginaYou've never seen oneNo I feel like I should have a piece of cake or somethingOkay you readyYeah OkayOkayWhatAre you in pain right nowYou don't like itNo I love itYeah yeah it's justIt looks like a firecracker wrapped in roast - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:38
Yeah this is my first vaginaYou've never seen oneNo I...
Okay. What? Are you in pain right now? You don't like it. No, I love it! Yeah, yeah, it's just... It - A Million Ways to Die in the West 01:00
Okay. What? Are you in pain right now? You don't like...
Anna! Ruth, can I come in? Sure. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:05
Anna! Ruth, can I come in? Sure.
He's coming up the stairs! - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:05
He's coming up the stairs!
Please don't shoot us on sex night - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:04
Please don't shoot us on sex night
It's a boy, Mr. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:16
It's a boy, Mr.
There ain't no tooth fairy, idiot! - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:06
There ain't no tooth fairy, idiot!
Albert, I think I lost my essay. - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:33
Albert, I think I lost my essay.
Class please welcome our graduation speakerPresident Abraham LincolnHiya shmucksFour score and seven years agoI was brokejust like youBut now I'm the presidentand I'm so fucking richI can have all the licorice I wantWhere's my speaking feeI don't think - A Million Ways to Die in the West 00:36
Class please welcome our graduation speakerPresident Abraham...