Clips with Amy Schumer

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The Humans  AIMEE: Excuse me, um,   I'm taking MoMo  - The Humans 00:04
 AIMEE: Excuse me, um,   I'm taking MoMo 
The Humans  AIMEE: Can I help you?   RICHARD: Thought, uh,  - The Humans 00:06
 AIMEE: Can I help you?   RICHARD: Thought, uh, 
The Humans  AIMEE: I'm so sorry,   this will be weird for you,  - The Humans 00:05
 AIMEE: I'm so sorry,   this will be weird for you, ...
The Humans  AIMEE: Okay, MoMo.   (ERIK SHUSHING)  - The Humans 00:06
 AIMEE: Okay, MoMo.   (ERIK SHUSHING) 
The Humans  AIMEE: Hello.   So, this is what lies beneath.  - The Humans 00:04
 AIMEE: Hello.   So, this is what lies beneath. 
The Humans  AIMEE: Dad... Ugh, no.  - The Humans 00:04
 AIMEE: Dad... Ugh, no. 
The Humans  When did that happen?   ERIK: That mean it just takes  - The Humans 00:06
 When did that happen?   ERIK: That mean it just takes ...
The Humans  AIMEE: No, you're not, Mom.   You're good, though?  - The Humans 00:04
 AIMEE: No, you're not, Mom.   You're good, though...
The Humans  AIMEE: And how's Aunt Mary?   (LAUGHS)  - The Humans 00:07
 AIMEE: And how's Aunt Mary?   (LAUGHS) 
The Humans  AIMEE: Hey, guys,   no one be alarmed  - The Humans 00:08
 AIMEE: Hey, guys,   no one be alarmed 
The Humans  (DEIRDRE   CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)  - The Humans 00:08
 (DEIRDRE   CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY) 
The Humans  Riboflavin.   (BOTH CONTINUE INDISTINCTLY)  - The Humans 00:05
 Riboflavin.   (BOTH CONTINUE INDISTINCTLY) 
The Humans  BRIGID: Okay.   (PEOPLE LAUGH)  - The Humans 00:05
 BRIGID: Okay.   (PEOPLE LAUGH) 
The Humans  (STOMPING)  - The Humans 00:06
 (STOMPING) 
The Humans  (STOMPING CONTINUES)  - The Humans 00:07
 (STOMPING CONTINUES) 
The Humans  (AIMEE LAUGHS)   (BRIGID SIGHS)  - The Humans 00:04
 (AIMEE LAUGHS)   (BRIGID SIGHS) 
The Humans  AIMEE: "Three simple ways   to find joy."  - The Humans 00:07
 AIMEE: "Three simple ways   to find joy." ...
The Humans Maybe loving someone long term is more - The Humans 00:11
Maybe loving someone long term is more
The Humans  ...tell?   No. But maybe it's 'cause  - The Humans 00:07
 ...tell?   No. But maybe it's 'cause 
The Humans  We're gonna try and keep   our fridge stocked with them,  - The Humans 00:06
 We're gonna try and keep   our fridge stocked with the...
The Humans  (LAUGHS)  - The Humans 00:05
 (LAUGHS) 
The Humans  AIMEE: We're conferring over   Mom's latest e-mail forward.  - The Humans 00:05
 AIMEE: We're conferring over   Mom's latest e-mai...
The Humans  AIMEE: Rich,   Mom's subject line was,  - The Humans 00:05
 AIMEE: Rich,   Mom's subject line was, 
The Humans  All caps. It got flagged   by my IT department  - The Humans 00:11
 All caps. It got flagged   by my IT department 
The Humans  AIMEE: And then we each eat   a piece of the peppermint  - The Humans 00:04
 AIMEE: And then we each eat   a piece of the peppermint ...
The Humans  (DEIRDRE LAUGHING)  - The Humans 00:05
 (DEIRDRE LAUGHING) 
The Humans ERIK Oh Uh how about for MoMo - The Humans 01:57
ERIK Oh Uh how about for MoMo
The Humans  AIMEE: Hey,   if you're having   another one,  - The Humans 00:05
 AIMEE: Hey,   if you're having   another one, ...
The Humans  AIMEE: I don't mind   using my work account  - The Humans 00:05
 AIMEE: I don't mind   using my work account 
The Humans  AIMEE: This is on me.   I'm calling a car,  - The Humans 00:05
 AIMEE: This is on me.   I'm calling a car, 
The Humans  AIMEE: Hi, I, uh...   Yeah, I need a car.  - The Humans 00:05
 AIMEE: Hi, I, uh...   Yeah, I need a car. 
The Humans  AIMEE: Yeah, exactly.  - The Humans 00:04
 AIMEE: Yeah, exactly. 
The Humans  Give me the phone.   (DEIRDRE SOBS QUIETLY)  - The Humans 00:05
 Give me the phone.   (DEIRDRE SOBS QUIETLY) 
The Humans It smells really bad in there - The Humans 00:09
It smells really bad in there
The Humans  (ERIK SIGHS)  - The Humans 00:05
 (ERIK SIGHS) 
The Humans  AIMEE: Yeah,   I want some air, Dad.  - The Humans 00:05
 AIMEE: Yeah,   I want some air, Dad. 
The Humans  I was saying to Father Paul  - The Humans 00:04
 I was saying to Father Paul 
The Humans  AIMEE: What are you...   ...gets me thinking   about how,  - The Humans 00:08
 AIMEE: What are you...   ...gets me thinking   about how, ...
IF And Mom said too much candy isn' t good for your tummy - IF 00:13
And Mom said too much candy isn' t good for your tummy
Comedy Central Roast of... Dude your nose is like my ass - Comedy Central Roast of Charlie Sheen 00:09
Dude your nose is like my ass
Snatched You know who you have the haircut of - Snatched
You know who you have the haircut of
Snatched Yeah And like why Ecuador - Snatched 00:10
Yeah And like why Ecuador
Snatched I really need it - Snatched 00:19
I really need it
Snatched And are things ideal financially right now - Snatched 00:10
And are things ideal financially right now
Snatched You know what You're fired What - Snatched 00:17
You know what You're fired What
Snatched Look can we just talk about this - Snatched 00:10
Look can we just talk about this
Snatched Look This is the thing - Snatched 00:14
Look This is the thing
Snatched You always say music inspires you - Snatched 00:16
You always say music inspires you
Snatched You're so gay for Mom - Snatched 00:07
You're so gay for Mom
Snatched Help me put the fun - Snatched 00:57
Help me put the fun
Snatched Help me put the fun - Snatched 00:07
Help me put the fun
Snatched They're not serving up whale semen - Snatched 00:02
They're not serving up whale semen
Snatched I was supposed to be a king - Snatched 00:32
I was supposed to be a king
Snatched You look like a beekeeper - Snatched 00:02
You look like a beekeeper
Snatched Uh not you It was me Excuse me - Snatched 00:06
Uh not you It was me Excuse me
Snatched I've just spent the past few weeks in Koh Phangan - Snatched 00:17
I've just spent the past few weeks in Koh Phangan
Snatched So here you are How come you're here - Snatched 00:05
So here you are How come you're here
Snatched You've been to Egypt What were you saying - Snatched 00:30
You've been to Egypt What were you saying
Snatched Remember never have more drinks than you have tits - Snatched 00:06
Remember never have more drinks than you have tits
Snatched That was not what it looked like - Snatched 00:08
That was not what it looked like
Snatched Your tit's out - Snatched 00:22
Your tit's out
Snatched What Do you hear yourself - Snatched 00:04
What Do you hear yourself
Snatched Waterfalls and rainbows - Snatched 00:02
Waterfalls and rainbows
Snatched Oh my God They took my phone - Snatched 00:06
Oh my God They took my phone
Snatched Holy shit - Snatched 00:05
Holy shit
Snatched What's your PIN number - Snatched 00:12
What's your PIN number
Snatched I have a real phobia about this - Snatched 00:07
I have a real phobia about this
Snatched We really need to get to the US consulate in - Snatched 00:08
We really need to get to the US consulate in
Snatched I don't know any Spanish I only know one word - Snatched 00:12
I don't know any Spanish I only know one word
Snatched Just use the map Mom - Snatched 00:08
Just use the map Mom