Clips with David Herman

Office Space WHY DOES IT SAY PAPER JAM WHEN THERE IS NO PAPER JAMI SWEAR TO GOD ONE OF THESE DAYS I JUST KICK THIS PIECE OF SHIT OUT THE WINDOWYOU AND ME BOTH MAN THE THING IS LUCKY I'M NOT ARMEDPIECE OF SHIT SAM IRE - Office Space 00:18
WHY DOES IT SAY PAPER JAM WHEN THERE IS NO PAPER JAMI SWEAR...
Office Space NO ONE IN THIS COUNTRY CAN EVER PRONOUNCE MY NAME RIGHTI IT'S NOT THAT HARD NAGHEENANAJAR NAGHEENANAJARYEAH WELL AT LEAST YOUR NAME ISN'T MICHAEL BOLTONYOU KNOW THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT NAMETHERE WAS NOTHING WRONG WITH IT UNTIL I WAS ABOUT 12 YEARS - Office Space 00:29
NO ONE IN THIS COUNTRY CAN EVER PRONOUNCE MY NAME RIGHTI...
Office Space No one in this country can pronounce my name right - Office Space 00:29
No one in this country can pronounce my name right
Office Space HEY GUYS WHAT'S UP GWANNA GO TO CHOTCHKIE'S GET SOME COFFEE OH IT'S A LITTLE EARLYI GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE I THINK I'M GOING TO LOSE ITUH OH SOUNDS LIKE SOMEBODY'S GOT A CASE OF THE MONDAYS - Office Space 00:15
HEY GUYS WHAT'S UP GWANNA GO TO CHOTCHKIE'S GET...
Office Space Peter EVERY WEEK YOU SAY YOU'RE GOING TO LOSE YOUR JOB AND YOU'RE STILL HERETom NOT THIS TIME I BET I'M THE FIRST ONE LAID OFFTHE THOUGHT OF HAVING TO GO TO THE STATE UNEMPLOYMENT OFFICE TO STAND IN LINE WITH SCUMBAGS - Office Space 00:12
Peter EVERY WEEK YOU SAY YOU'RE GOING TO LOSE YOUR JOB...
Office Space YOU THINK THE PET ROCK WAS A REALLY GREAT IDEASURE IT WAS THE GUY MADE A MILLION DOLLARSYOU KNOW I HAD AN IDEA LIKE THAT ONCE A LONG TIME AGOREALLY WHAT WAS IT TOMWELL ALL RIGHTIT WAS A JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS MATYOU SEE IT WOULD BE THIS MATTHAT YOU WOULD PUT - Office Space 00:38
YOU THINK THE PET ROCK WAS A REALLY GREAT IDEASURE IT WAS...
Office Space IT WAS A JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS MATYOU SEE IT WOULD BE THIS MATTHAT YOU WOULD PUT ON THE FLOORAND IT WOULD HAVE DIFFERENT CONCLUSIONS WRITTEN ON ITTHAT YOU COULD JUMP TOTHAT IS THE WORST IDEA I'VE EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE TOMYES YES IT'S HORRIBLE THIS IDEA - Office Space 00:30
IT WAS A JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS MATYOU SEE IT WOULD BE THIS...
Office Space OUR HIGH SCHOOL GUIDANCE COUNSELOR USED TO ASK US WHAT YOU WOULD DOIF YOU HAD A MILLION DOLLARS DIDN'T HAVE TO WORKAND INVARIABLY WHATEVER YOU'D SAY THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR CAREERIF YOU WANTED TO FIX OLD CARS THEN YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE AN AUTO - Office Space 00:47
OUR HIGH SCHOOL GUIDANCE COUNSELOR USED TO ASK US WHAT YOU...
Office Space PETER YOU'RE IN DEEP SHIT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO COME IN ON SATURDAYWHAT WERE YOU DOING MICHAEL I DID NOTHINGI DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING AND IT WAS EVERYTHING THAT I THOUGHT IT COULD BE - Office Space 00:13
PETER YOU'RE IN DEEP SHIT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO COME IN...
Office Space SAMIR AND I ARE THE BEST PROGRAMMERS THEY GOT AT THAT PLACEAND YOU YOU HAVEN'T BEEN SHOWIN' UP AND YOU GET TO KEEP YOUR JOBACTUALLY I'M BEING PROMOTED WHAT - Office Space 00:11
SAMIR AND I ARE THE BEST PROGRAMMERS THEY GOT AT THAT...
Office Space IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT ME AND MY DREAM OF DOING NOTHINGIT'S ABOUT ALL OF US TOGETHERI DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO ME AT THAT HYPNOTHERAPISTAND I DON'T KNOW MAYBE IT WAS JUST SHOCK AND IT'S WEARING OFF NOWBUT WHEN I SAW THAT FAT MAN KEEL OVER AND DIEMICHAEL - Office Space 00:41
IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT ME AND MY DREAM OF DOING...
Office Space COME ON THIS ISN'T RIYADHTHEY'RE NOT GONNA SAW YOUR HANDS OFF HERE ALL RIGHTTHE WORST THEY WOULD EVER DO IS THEY WOULD PUT YOU FOR A COUPLE OF MONTHSINTO A WHITE COLLAR MINIMUM SECURITY RESORTSHIT WE SHOULD BE SO LUCKYDO YOU KNOW THEY HAVE CONJUGAL VISITS - Office Space 00:23
COME ON THIS ISN'T RIYADHTHEY'RE NOT GONNA SAW...
Office Space BUT LISTEN BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHERWE HAVE TO SWEAR TO GOD ALLAHTHAT NOBODY KNOWS ABOUT THIS BUT USALL RIGHT NO FAMILY MEMBERS NO GIRLFRIENDS NOBODYOF COURSE AGREEDLawrence DON'T WORRY MAN I WON'T TELL ANYONE EITHERWHAT THE FUCK IS THAT NO DON'T WORRY - Office Space 00:20
BUT LISTEN BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHERWE HAVE TO SWEAR TO GOD...
Office Space I MUST'VE PUT A DECIMAL POINT IN THE WRONG PLACE OR SOMETHINGSHIT I ALWAYS DO THAT I ALWAYS MESS UP SOME MUNDANE DETAILOH WELL THIS IS NOT A MUNDANE DETAIL MICHAEL - Office Space 00:12
I MUST'VE PUT A DECIMAL POINT IN THE WRONG PLACE OR...
Office Space WE GET CAUGHT LAUNDERING MONEY WE'RE NOT GOING TO WHITE COLLAR RESORT PRISONNO NO NO WE'RE GOING TO FEDERAL POUND ME IN THE ASS PRISONI I I DON'T WANT TO GO TO ANY PRISON - Office Space 00:12
WE GET CAUGHT LAUNDERING MONEY WE'RE NOT GOING TO WHITE...
Dude, Where's My Car? Dude your dog's a stoner Can he also bong a beer - Dude, Where's My Car? 00:10
Dude your dog's a stoner Can he also bong a beer
Dude, Where's My Car? Deep in your consciousness you must look - Dude, Where's My Car? 00:13
Deep in your consciousness you must look
Kicking & Screaming Where do I know you from - Kicking & Screaming 00:10
Where do I know you from
Kicking & Screaming Look at me I'm the ref I'm the ref I'm the ref - Kicking & Screaming 00:20
Look at me I'm the ref I'm the ref I'm the...
Kicking & Screaming You all had a laugh - Kicking & Screaming 00:08
You all had a laugh
Idiocracy Brought to you by Carl's Jr - Idiocracy 00:20
Brought to you by Carl's Jr
Idiocracy I'm the secretary of state Brought to you by Carl's JrWhy do you keep saying that 'Cause they pay me every time I do - Idiocracy 00:09
I'm the secretary of state Brought to you by...
Idiocracy Yo Mr Secretary Not Sure They found that whore you wantedHey that may be how you refer to women in the future but come onNo sir Turns out she charged some guy a lotta money and didn't put outDon't worry though We'll get her outon a work release whorin' - Idiocracy 00:19
Yo Mr Secretary Not Sure They found that whore you wantedHey...
Idiocracy For the last time I'm pretty surewhat's killing the crops is this Brawndo stuffBut Brawndo's got what plants crave It's got electrolytesSo wait a minute What you're sayingis that you want us to put water on the cropsYes Water Like out the toiletWell I - Idiocracy 00:44
For the last time I'm pretty surewhat's killing...
Idiocracy What are electrolytes Do you even knowIt's what they use to make BrawndoYeah but why do they use them to make Brawndo'Cause Brawndo's got electrolytes - Idiocracy 00:13
What are electrolytes Do you even knowIt's what they...
Futurama: Bender's Big... Read the code or I'll shoot this guy - Futurama: Bender's Big Score 00:10
Read the code or I'll shoot this guy
Futurama: Bender's Big... You've got no code - Futurama: Bender's Big Score 00:06
You've got no code
Futurama: Bender's Big... Nice attack doo doo heads - Futurama: Bender's Big Score 00:04
Nice attack doo doo heads
Futurama: Bender's Big... I'm not afraid of you or your expensive gun - Futurama: Bender's Big Score 00:20
I'm not afraid of you or your expensive gun
Futurama: The Beast with a... Not The Crackslam - Futurama: The Beast with a Billion Backs 00:11
Not The Crackslam
Futurama: The Beast with a... But I'm agreeing with you - Futurama: The Beast with a Billion Backs 00:24
But I'm agreeing with you