Clips with Jesse Eisenberg

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The Emperor's Club What is your name - The Emperor's Club 01:01
What is your name
The Emperor's Club Jesus Christ I am such an asshole - The Emperor's Club 00:04
Jesus Christ I am such an asshole
The Emperor's Club There is a code at Saint Benedict's - The Emperor's Club 00:55
There is a code at Saint Benedict's
Roger Dodger But you can't sell a product without first making people feel bad - Roger Dodger 00:35
But you can't sell a product without first making...
Roger Dodger Surprised she didn't come with you Maybe she was afraid to see you - Roger Dodger 00:14
Surprised she didn't come with you Maybe she was afraid...
Roger Dodger Why give into a slump Let's go down swinging - Roger Dodger 00:11
Why give into a slump Let's go down swinging
Roger Dodger I guess I'll see you at the next funeral - Roger Dodger 00:09
I guess I'll see you at the next funeral
The Squid and the Whale Ls Mom letting you drink soda - The Squid and the Whale 00:19
Ls Mom letting you drink soda
The Squid and the Whale Your mom and I - The Squid and the Whale 00:36
Your mom and I
The Squid and the Whale I don't wanna think about it - The Squid and the Whale 00:30
I don't wanna think about it
The Squid and the Whale I mean it's gross when he turns into a bug - The Squid and the Whale 00:15
I mean it's gross when he turns into a bug
The Squid and the Whale My father said you had a weak handshake which is a sign - The Squid and the Whale 00:07
My father said you had a weak handshake which is a sign
The Squid and the Whale Do you - The Squid and the Whale 00:13
Do you
The Squid and the Whale I wonder how you're feeling right now - The Squid and the Whale 00:37
I wonder how you're feeling right now
The Squid and the Whale I shouldn't have broken up with Sophie - The Squid and the Whale 00:18
I shouldn't have broken up with Sophie
Justice League I will take my place among the New Gods - Justice League 00:09
I will take my place among the New Gods
Camp Hell I know but there was a girl not in her cabin last night - Camp Hell 00:07
I know but there was a girl not in her cabin last night
Adventureland So you're going to Columbia - Adventureland 01:21
So you're going to Columbia
Adventureland I thought you were off today - Adventureland 02:17
I thought you were off today
Adventureland What are you studying - Adventureland 02:08
What are you studying
Adventureland To his mother's basement - Adventureland 01:35
To his mother's basement
Adventureland I don't know what to say - Adventureland 01:49
I don't know what to say
Adventureland What's the point of being a writer or an artist anyway - Adventureland 02:06
What's the point of being a writer or an artist anyway
Adventureland They got you working on Games - Adventureland 00:19
They got you working on Games
Adventureland So your life must be utter shit - Adventureland 00:10
So your life must be utter shit
Adventureland We have a winner - Adventureland 00:51
We have a winner
Adventureland Ladies and gentlemen - Adventureland 00:57
Ladies and gentlemen
Adventureland This faggot's trying to rip off a kid - Adventureland 00:54
This faggot's trying to rip off a kid
Adventureland One of those textile worshiping cults no doubt - Adventureland 00:12
One of those textile worshiping cults no doubt
Adventureland Looks like it's us Let's go panty stain - Adventureland 00:11
Looks like it's us Let's go panty stain
Adventureland All right I'll see you Brennan What the hell was that - Adventureland 00:07
All right I'll see you Brennan What the hell was that
Adventureland I heard you jammed with Lou Reed - Adventureland 00:31
I heard you jammed with Lou Reed
Adventureland It's my stepmom - Adventureland 00:38
It's my stepmom
Adventureland Look at the shape of her ass - Adventureland 00:31
Look at the shape of her ass
Adventureland I am amazed at how tiny my paycheck is - Adventureland 00:09
I am amazed at how tiny my paycheck is
Adventureland Jesus Fucking Christ - Adventureland 00:11
Jesus Fucking Christ
Adventureland I feel like I should tell you - Adventureland 00:39
I feel like I should tell you
Adventureland Was the sex good - Adventureland 00:42
Was the sex good
Adventureland The park's closed - Adventureland 00:13
The park's closed
Adventureland I can't believe my dad wants to be with that - Adventureland 00:52
I can't believe my dad wants to be with that
Adventureland Frigo get the fuck out of here - Adventureland 00:19
Frigo get the fuck out of here
Adventureland You been toking up - Adventureland 00:14
You been toking up
Adventureland Where are you taking me - Adventureland 00:57
Where are you taking me
Adventureland Hey is it because of Sue What - Adventureland 00:41
Hey is it because of Sue What
Adventureland I saw Em and Connell in his car - Adventureland 00:22
I saw Em and Connell in his car
Adventureland Don't get all drunk and fall asleep or anything - Adventureland 00:13
Don't get all drunk and fall asleep or anything
Adventureland I just got off the bus - Adventureland 00:42
I just got off the bus
Adventureland My theory is you can't just avoid everybody you screw up with - Adventureland 00:17
My theory is you can't just avoid everybody you screw...
Adventureland Are we doing this - Adventureland 00:12
Are we doing this
Zombieland I wish i could tell you that this was still AmericaBut I've come to realise that you can't have a country without peopleAnd there are no people hereNo my friends this is now The United States Of Zombieland - Zombieland 00:35
I wish i could tell you that this was still AmericaBut...
Zombieland For obvious reasons - Zombieland 00:17
For obvious reasons
Zombieland Poor fat bastard - Zombieland 00:04
Poor fat bastard
Zombieland In those moments when you're not sure that the 'undead' are really dead edDon't get off stingy with your bullets I mean one more clean shot to the headAnd this lady could have avoided becoming a human happy mealWoulda Coulda Shoulda - Zombieland 00:19
In those moments when you're not sure that the...
Zombieland Fasten your seatbeltsIt's gonna be a bumpy ride - Zombieland 00:06
Fasten your seatbeltsIt's gonna be a bumpy ride
Zombieland You almost knocked off your alcohol with your knife - Zombieland 00:05
You almost knocked off your alcohol with your knife
Zombieland You see he was in the ass kicking business and Bussiness is Good - Zombieland 00:06
You see he was in the ass kicking business and Bussiness is...
Zombieland Sno balls Yeah Sno ballsWhere's the fucking Twinkies I like Sno ballsI hate coconut Not the taste the consistencyOh this Twinkie thing it ain't over yet - Zombieland 00:22
Sno balls Yeah Sno ballsWhere's the fucking Twinkies I...
Zombieland I've had always my whole life wanted to brush a girl's hair over her ear - Zombieland 00:07
I've had always my whole life wanted to brush a...
Zombieland That was my first brush with the plaque of the 21st centuryRemember mad cow disease Well 'Mad cow' became 'mad person' became 'mad zombie'It's a fast acting virus that left you with a swollen brain raging fever and make you hateful violentAnd give you - Zombieland 00:20
That was my first brush with the plaque of the 21st...
Zombieland I've heard there's a place untouched by all this crap Back east yeahYeah you heard the same thingOut west we hear back east back east hear it's here out westAnd it's all just nonsenseYou know you're like a penguin on the north pole hear the south pole is - Zombieland 00:28
I've heard there's a place untouched by all this...
Zombieland When Tallahassee goes Hulk on a zombie he set the standard for not to be fucked with - Zombieland 00:07
When Tallahassee goes Hulk on a zombie he set the standard...
Zombieland Don't swing don't swingSwing - Zombieland 00:04
Don't swing don't swingSwing
Zombieland Someone's ear is in danger of having hair brushed over it - Zombieland 00:05
Someone's ear is in danger of having hair brushed over...
Zombieland Do you know this guy who's trying to like to be in everyone's storyNo I knew who got away worse than that to me - Zombieland 00:10
Do you know this guy who's trying to like to be in...
Zombieland Tallahassee firmly believe that you have to blow off steam in Zombielandor else you'll lose what's left of your mindWell if it makes him happy and keeps him from using that crowbar on meThen I say Hey go waste shit - Zombieland 00:14
Tallahassee firmly believe that you have to blow off steam...
Zombieland The amusement park - Zombieland 00:38
The amusement park
Zombieland Hey for fuck's sake enough already we're being chased by ravenous freaksWe don't have enough problemsOh they stole my Hummer We have trust issuesNow get over it okay we can't just fucking drive down the road playing I spyor some shit for two hours like - Zombieland 00:20
Hey for fuck's sake enough already we're being...
Zombieland I've actually been meaning to ask you - Zombieland 00:15
I've actually been meaning to ask you
Zombieland Poor flat bastard - Zombieland 00:04
Poor flat bastard
Zombieland Ok let me begin my three part apology by sayingthat I think you're a wonderful human with great potentialFYI I beat wholesale ass for a lot less than thatI'm sure You get 45 powerThank you - Zombieland 00:20
Ok let me begin my three part apology by sayingthat I think...