Clips with Kumail Nanjiani

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Life as We Know It Do you know what marriage is like Imagine a prisonAnd then don't change anything We're not married - Life as We Know It 00:09
Do you know what marriage is like Imagine a prisonAnd then...
Death to 2020 I realized our whole world could collapse into chaos and disaster - Death to 2020 00:26
I realized our whole world could collapse into chaos and...
Death to 2020 Narrator Throughout 2020 the gods of Silicon Valley stand accused - Death to 2020 00:26
Narrator Throughout 2020 the gods of Silicon Valley stand...
Central Intelligence Sir you cannot be in here This is a private airfieldI understand that but I have an organ in this cooler right nowthat needs to get transported ASAPReallyBecause my sister in law had a heart transplant last yearand they did not bring it in a Playmate - Central Intelligence 00:34
Sir you cannot be in here This is a private airfieldI...
Men in Black: International You've never been in love have youI'm not making fun I'm genuinely askingYou've never once abandoned logic for passionUgh what is this the sequel to The NotebookI never saw it but I assume it's a lot of this type of nonsenseNo I haven'tPassion is unstable - Men in Black: International 00:44
You've never been in love have youI'm not making...
Men in Black: International It's Molly huhYou're not supposed to know thatWell too late I know it nowGuess it's only fair that you know mineI don't wanna know yours I'm gonna tell youOkay You readyHoratioIt is not It's notIt's HenryYeah you look like a HenryGood It's all I've gotI'm - Men in Black: International 00:32
It's Molly huhYou're not supposed to know thatWell...
The Lego Ninjago Movie It's okay Lloyd Nobody's parents are perfect - The Lego Ninjago Movie 00:15
It's okay Lloyd Nobody's parents are perfect
The Lego Ninjago Movie - JAY: I'm gonna throw up! - (CAT SNARLS) - The Lego Ninjago Movie 00:20
- JAY: I'm gonna throw up! - (CAT SNARLS)
Addicted to Fresno You know who would've loved that - Addicted to Fresno 00:05
You know who would've loved that
The Big Sick Chris He's like if a serial killer - The Big Sick 00:09
Chris He's like if a serial killer
The Big Sick I didn't heckle you - The Big Sick 00:21
I didn't heckle you
The Big Sick [TV PLAYING] - The Big Sick 00:05
[TV PLAYING]
The Big Sick KUMAIL: Night of the Living Dead? - The Big Sick 00:04
KUMAIL: Night of the Living Dead?
The Big Sick Listen I had a really nice time - The Big Sick 00:19
Listen I had a really nice time
The Big Sick Were you available for rides while we were fucking - The Big Sick 00:06
Were you available for rides while we were fucking
The Big Sick "The truth is out there." [LAUGHS] - The Big Sick 00:08
"The truth is out there." [LAUGHS]
The Big Sick EMILY: So, are you ever gonna let me sit in the front seat? - The Big Sick 00:08
EMILY: So, are you ever gonna let me sit in the front seat?
The Big Sick - KUMAIL: Yeah. - I know I've said that before, - The Big Sick 00:04
- KUMAIL: Yeah. - I know I've said that before,
The Big Sick That's my mom cooking the murgh rogan josh. - The Big Sick 00:07
That's my mom cooking the murgh rogan josh.
The Big Sick WOMAN: There you go, honey. Yeah. That's it. - The Big Sick 00:05
WOMAN: There you go, honey. Yeah. That's it.
The Big Sick Toast is the only food No I mean - The Big Sick 00:37
Toast is the only food No I mean
The Big Sick I feel good about the surgery - The Big Sick 00:12
I feel good about the surgery
The Big Sick I was so worried - The Big Sick 00:11
I was so worried
The Big Sick [EXHALES] - The Big Sick 00:10
[EXHALES]
The Big Sick It was horrible too - The Big Sick 00:25
It was horrible too
The Big Sick So to fully know I love someone - The Big Sick 00:15
So to fully know I love someone
The Big Sick Love isn't easy - The Big Sick 00:14
Love isn't easy
The Big Sick TERRY: Hey. KUMAIL: Hey, um, so, - The Big Sick 00:06
TERRY: Hey. KUMAIL: Hey, um, so,
The Big Sick [REGISTER BEEPING] - The Big Sick 00:04
[REGISTER BEEPING]
The Big Sick [COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING] - The Big Sick 00:05
[COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING]
The Big Sick - KUMAIL: Yeah. - [AUDIENCE LAUGHING] - The Big Sick 00:05
- KUMAIL: Yeah. - [AUDIENCE LAUGHING]
The Big Sick KUMAIL: So, the first time I came to America, - The Big Sick 00:27
KUMAIL: So, the first time I came to America,
Migration Every time you tell a story Gwen wets her twig bed - Migration 00:24
Every time you tell a story Gwen wets her twig bed
Migration So listen Chump - Migration 00:14
So listen Chump
Migration Pam enough - Migration 00:13
Pam enough
Migration Come on Pam - Migration 00:10
Come on Pam
Migration Hey you changed your mind - Migration 00:08
Hey you changed your mind
Migration Thank you - Migration 00:08
Thank you
Dolittle Your ladyship, Rose. - Dolittle 00:33
Your ladyship, Rose.
Dolittle I blame the hat - Dolittle 00:04
I blame the hat
Dolittle What bird stuff can you do - Dolittle 00:04
What bird stuff can you do
Dolittle (monkeys chittering) - Dolittle 00:08
(monkeys chittering)
Dolittle - STUBBINS: Yoshi! - Dolittle 00:34
- STUBBINS: Yoshi!
Dolittle - (creaking) - (monkeys hooting) - Dolittle 00:04
- (creaking) - (monkeys hooting)
Dolittle ♪ - PLIMPTON: Yeah! - Dolittle 00:16
♪ - PLIMPTON: Yeah!
Dolittle MÜDFLY: This must be it. - Dolittle 00:34
MÜDFLY: This must be it.
Dolittle - Look at me. - (wind howling) - Dolittle 00:05
- Look at me. - (wind howling)
Stuber Let me guess you want me to drive you - Stuber 00:06
Let me guess you want me to drive you
Stuber I can't see - Stuber 00:11
I can't see
Stuber I'm just gonna drop off Douche Lundgren and I'll be right over okay - Stuber 00:08
I'm just gonna drop off Douche Lundgren and I'll...
Stuber What other races can you do impressions of Can you do me - Stuber 00:12
What other races can you do impressions of Can you do me
Stuber Okay stop just yelling neighborhoods - Stuber 00:04
Okay stop just yelling neighborhoods
Stuber 'Cause I've got self respect You know what that is - Stuber 00:05
'Cause I've got self respect You know what that is
Stuber You know I don't remember - Stuber 00:03
You know I don't remember
Stuber I'm gonna need therapy for the rest of my life - Stuber 00:14
I'm gonna need therapy for the rest of my life
Stuber So how do you know my dad - Stuber 00:08
So how do you know my dad
Stuber He's the second worst guy I've ever met - Stuber 00:08
He's the second worst guy I've ever met
Stuber Put it on my Uber tab There's no tab - Stuber 00:06
Put it on my Uber tab There's no tab
Stuber I could've called another Uber driver earlier - Stuber 00:06
I could've called another Uber driver earlier
Stuber You remember that part of NeverEnding Story - Stuber 00:20
You remember that part of NeverEnding Story
Stuber You Stockholm syndromed me - Stuber 00:02
You Stockholm syndromed me
Stuber You've got brass balls - Stuber 00:12
You've got brass balls
Stuber It was a lease - Stuber 00:12
It was a lease
The Lovebirds What can I get for you guys - The Lovebirds 00:14
What can I get for you guys
The Lovebirds I'm what they call a bleeder in the boxing biz - The Lovebirds 00:09
I'm what they call a bleeder in the boxing biz
Eternals Gilgamesh: I just saw that. - Eternals 00:33
Gilgamesh: I just saw that.
Eternals Cut! Okay, everyone, that was good. But we could do 10% better. That was beautiful. Very, very good. - Eternals 00:57
Cut! Okay, everyone, that was good. But we could do 10%...
Eternals Oh karun he's worked with me for 50 yearsI trust him completelyActually when we first met he thought I was a vampireand he tried to stake me through the heartI have apologised so many timesNot quite enough timesVery close though I'll let you know - Eternals 00:15
Oh karun he's worked with me for 50 yearsI trust him...
Eternals Seven thousand years. - Eternals 00:35
Seven thousand years.
Eternals Okay, well, we'll circle back to her. - Eternals 00:57
Okay, well, we'll circle back to her.