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"Airplane!" quotes

Airplane! poster
The persons and events in this film are fictitious – fortunately! A masterpiece of off-the-wall comedy, Airplane! features Robert Hays as an ex-fighter pilot forced to take over the controls of an airliner when the flight crew succumbs to food poisoning; Julie Hagerty as his girlfriend/stewardess/co-pilot; and a cast of all-stars including Robert Stack, Lloyd Bridges, Peter Graves, Leslie Nielsen, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar... and more. Their hilarious high jinks spoof airplane disaster flicks, religious zealots, television commercials, romantic love... the list whirls by in rapid succession, and the story races from one moment of zany fun to the next.

Director: Jim Abrahams, David Zucker, Jerry Zucker
Writer: Jim Abrahams, David Zucker, Jerry Zucker
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy
Year: 1980
MetaScore: 78/100
ImdbRating: 7.7
BoxOffice: $83,453,539
Released: 02 Jul 1980
Awards: Nominated for 1 BAFTA Award3 wins & 7 nominations total
R e s p e c t find out what it means to me - Airplane! 00:17 R e s p e c t find out what it means to me Elaine just hear me out - Airplane! 00:43 Elaine just hear me out Oh my god The automatic pilot it's deflating - Airplane! 00:18 Oh my god The automatic pilot it's deflating Yes I wanted you to know now - Airplane! 00:24 Yes I wanted you to know now Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines - Airplane! Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines Bad news The fog is getting thicker - Airplane! 00:09 Bad news The fog is getting thicker Because of my mistake six men didn't return from that raid - Airplane! 00:10 Because of my mistake six men didn't return from that... Can you fly this plane and land it - Airplane! 00:09 Can you fly this plane and land it Can I get you something - Airplane! 00:27 Can I get you something Captain how soon can you land I can't tell - Airplane! 00:18 Captain how soon can you land I can't tell Captain maybe we ought to turn on the searchlights now - Airplane! 00:12 Captain maybe we ought to turn on the searchlights now Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked - Airplane! 00:13 Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get... Don't be a fool Striker - Airplane! 00:17 Don't be a fool Striker Excuse me this is the operator Captain Oveur - Airplane! 00:11 Excuse me this is the operator Captain Oveur Excuse me - Airplane! 00:23 Excuse me Extremely serious - Airplane! 00:31 Extremely serious Flight 209'er you're cleared for takeoff - Airplane! 00:29 Flight 209'er you're cleared for takeoff I haven't felt this awful since we saw that Ronald Reagan film - Airplane! 00:05 I haven't felt this awful since we saw that Ronald... I just wanna tell you both good luck We're all counting on you - Airplane! 00:04 I just wanna tell you both good luck We're all counting... I know but this guy doing the flying has no airline experience at all - Airplane! 00:10 I know but this guy doing the flying has no airline... It takes so many things to make love last - Airplane! 00:19 It takes so many things to make love last Jim never has a second cup of coffee at home - Airplane! 00:05 Jim never has a second cup of coffee at home Jim never vomits at home - Airplane! 00:04 Jim never vomits at home Joey have you ever been in a - Airplane! 00:07 Joey have you ever been in a Joey - Airplane! 00:06 Joey Johnny what do you make out of this - Airplane! 00:09 Johnny what do you make out of this Just kidding - Airplane! 00:03 Just kidding Ladies and gentlemen this is your stewardess speaking - Airplane! 00:23 Ladies and gentlemen this is your stewardess speaking Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking - Airplane! 00:06 Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking - Airplane! 00:06 Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines - Airplane! 00:06 Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue - Airplane! 00:06 Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue Mayday Mayday - Airplane! 00:10 Mayday Mayday Nervous - Airplane! 00:11 Nervous No wonder you're upset - Airplane! 00:20 No wonder you're upset Passengers certain to die - Airplane! 00:09 Passengers certain to die Randy are you all right - Airplane! 00:32 Randy are you all right Shana they bought their tickets - Airplane! 00:11 Shana they bought their tickets Shit This is a goddamn waste of time - Airplane! 00:06 Shit This is a goddamn waste of time Sure You ever been in a cockpit before - Airplane! 00:10 Sure You ever been in a cockpit before That's Lieutenant Hurwitz - Airplane! 00:28 That's Lieutenant Hurwitz The life of everyone onboard depends upon just one thing - Airplane! 00:10 The life of everyone onboard depends upon just one thing The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only - Airplane! 01:47 The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of... Wait a minute I know you - Airplane! 01:05 Wait a minute I know you Well I flew single engine fighters in the Air Force - Airplane! 00:12 Well I flew single engine fighters in the Air Force Well I'll give him another 20 minutes - Airplane! 00:05 Well I'll give him another 20 minutes What is it Doctor What's going on I'm not sure - Airplane! 00:09 What is it Doctor What's going on I'm not sure What was it we had for dinner tonight - Airplane! 00:10 What was it we had for dinner tonight What kind of plane is it - Airplane! 00:11 What kind of plane is it Would you like something to read Do you have anything light - Airplane! 00:12 Would you like something to read Do you have anything light WZAZ in Chicago where disco lives forever - Airplane! 00:06 WZAZ in Chicago where disco lives forever You got a telegram from headquarters today - Airplane! 00:11 You got a telegram from headquarters today You'd better tell the captain we've got to land as soon as we can - Airplane! 00:11 You'd better tell the captain we've got to land as...

Cast

Roger Murdock - Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
Steve McCroskey - Lloyd Bridges
Captain Clarence Oveur - Peter Graves
Elaine Dickinson - Julie Hagerty
Ted Striker - Robert Hays