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I also decided to have a kid because
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Ali Wong: Baby Cobra

I also decided to have a kid because uh, I'm only 33, which, I know, is nottechnically...

I also decided to have a kid because uh, I'm only 33, which, I know, is not
technically high-risk, but my body was starting
to show signs of change

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:05.046
I also decided to have a kid because
00:00:05.129 --> 00:00:07.298
uh, I'm only 33,
00:00:07.381 --> 00:00:09.675
which, I know, is not technically high-risk,
00:00:09.759 --> 00:00:13.721
but my body was starting to show signs of change.
Duration
15 seconds
Views
21
Timestamp in Movie
00:44:05
Uploaded
Nov 02, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
New Wave Entertainment

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Movie Summary

Ali Wong might be seven-months pregnant, but there’s not a fetus in the world that can stop this acerbic and savage train of comedy from delivering a masterful hour of stand-up.
And it-- And it scared me. Like, I'm only 33 and... - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:07
And it-- And it scared me. Like, I'm only 33 and...
My pussy is not as wet as it used to be. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:05
My pussy is not as wet as it used to be.
Do you remember when you were 18 years old, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:09
Do you remember when you were 18 years old,
All the time, you just took it for granted - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:14
All the time, you just took it for granted
"I slime you, I slime you. Ghostbusters!" - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:06
"I slime you, I slime you. Ghostbusters!"
I'm-- I'm 33, and I did have to get - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:09
I'm-- I'm 33, and I did have to get
Because, when I was in my 20s, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:07
Because, when I was in my 20s,
So, my uterus probably looked like a smoker's lung. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:06
So, my uterus probably looked like a smoker's lung.
And I found out - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:08
And I found out
So, then I had to take these hormone pills that were suppositories, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:09
So, then I had to take these hormone pills that were supposi...
And then, at my writing job, at Fresh Off The Boat, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:20
And then, at my writing job, at Fresh Off The Boat,
And then, a side effect of the progesterone - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:07
And then, a side effect of the progesterone
So, then I had to find ways to discretely scratch myself - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:12
So, then I had to find ways to discretely scratch myself
I want to be able to smell my fingers - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:08
I want to be able to smell my fingers
Housewives, they can just scratch and sniff all day long. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:05
Housewives, they can just scratch and sniff all day long.
They just vacuum, scratch, sniff. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:05
They just vacuum, scratch, sniff.
They make a sandwich. "Uh, mmm." - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:19
They make a sandwich. "Uh, mmm."
"smell my fingers?" - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:11
"smell my fingers?"
When my husband and I were trying to have a kid, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:08
When my husband and I were trying to have a kid,
You guys doin' a lot of fuckin'?" - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:09
You guys doin' a lot of fuckin'?"