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To keep him down so that he doesn't believe
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Ali Wong: Baby Cobra

To keep him downso that he doesn't believe that he's worthy ofanother woman's affection...

to keep him down
so that he doesn't believe that he's worthy of
another woman's affection and leaves me

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.711
to keep him down so that he doesn't believe
00:00:03.795 --> 00:00:07.131
that he's worthy of another woman's affection and leaves me.
Duration
8 seconds
Views
15
Timestamp in Movie
00:55:40
Uploaded
Nov 02, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
New Wave Entertainment

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Movie Summary

Ali Wong might be seven-months pregnant, but there’s not a fetus in the world that can stop this acerbic and savage train of comedy from delivering a masterful hour of stand-up.
I gotta keep him around by keeping him down. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:05
I gotta keep him around by keeping him down.
People don't tell you about all this shit that goes down with your body - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:07
People don't tell you about all this shit that goes dow...
I didn't know that they get dark so that the baby can see, like, a bullseye. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:06
I didn't know that they get dark so that the baby can s...
And then, you know, they get big-- they get big, like fingers. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:05
And then, you know, they get big-- they get big, like finger...
Like, "You, you. You owe me money, you." - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:11
Like, "You, you. You owe me money, you."
But I'm not gonna be one of those crazy pregnant ladies - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:09
But I'm not gonna be one of those crazy pregnant ladies
Hopefully, if you see me in a year, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:13
Hopefully, if you see me in a year,
Now that I'm seven and a half months pregnant, my pussy's all wet again. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:06
Now that I'm seven and a half months pregnant, my pussy...
But it's different. It's not like when I was 18 years old, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:07
But it's different. It's not like when I was 18 ye...
And I was like, "Why is it different?" And I looked it up, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:12
And I was like, "Why is it different?" And I looke...
When it's straight up soldier glue, when it's Neosporin. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:06
When it's straight up soldier glue, when it's Neos...
So, you know, I-- I, in-- - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:08
So, you know, I-- I, in--
And then, I meet this dream guy, who's, like, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:08
And then, I meet this dream guy, who's, like,
Got him to propose to me. Oh, my God, then we got married, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:13
Got him to propose to me. Oh, my God, then we got married,
And, uh, two weeks into the escrow process, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:14
And, uh, two weeks into the escrow process,
And me, with my hard-earned TV money, paid it all off. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:08
And me, with my hard-earned TV money, paid it all off.
So, as it turns out, he's the one who trapped me. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:07
So, as it turns out, he's the one who trapped me.
Oh! Maybe because he went to Harvard Business School, - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:11
Oh! Maybe because he went to Harvard Business School,
And now, if I don't work, we die. - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:06
And now, if I don't work, we die.
Why else do you think I'm performing seven and a half months pregnant? - Ali Wong: Baby Cobra 00:06
Why else do you think I'm performing seven and a half m...