Ah, the French certainly deserve to be punished for starting this war. Everybody says it's...

Albert Kropp: Ah, the French certainly deserve to be punished for starting this war. Detering: Everybody says it's somebody else. Tjaden: Well. how do they start a war? Albert Kropp: Well, one country offends another. Tjaden: How could one country offend another? Tjaden: You mean there's a mountain over in Germany gets mad at a field over in France? [Everyone laughs] Albert Kropp: Well, stupid, one people offends another. Tjaden: Oh, well, if that's it, I shouldn't be here at all. I don't feel offended. Katczinsky: It don't apply to tramps like you. Tjaden: Good. Then I could be goin' home right away. Paul Bäumer: Ah, you just try it. Katczinsky: Yeah. You wanna get shot? Tjaden: The kaiser and me... [the others laugh] Tjaden: Me and the kaiser felt just alike about this war. We didn't either of us want any war, so I'm going home. He's there already. Hair-peak soldier: Somebody must have wanted it. Maybe it was the English. No, I don't want to shoot any Englishman. I never saw one 'til I came up here. And I suppose most of them never saw a German 'til *they* came up here. No, I'm sure *they* weren't asked about it. Paul Bäumer: No. Detering: Well, it must be doing somebody some good. Detering: Not me and the kaiser. Hair-peak soldier: I think maybe the kaiser wanted a war. Tjaden: You leave us out of this! Katczinsky: I don't see that. The kaiser's *got* everything he needs. Hair-peak soldier: Well, he never had a war before. Every full-grown emperor needs one war to make him famous. Why, that's history. Paul Bäumer: Yeah, generals, too. They need war.

a nice fellow like Kemmerick. Ah, the French certainly deserve to be punished for starting this war. Everybody says it's somebody else. Well, how do they start a war? Well, one country offends another. How could one country offend another? You mean there's a mountain over in Germany gets mad at a field over in France? Well, stupid, one people offends another. Oh, if that's it, I shouldn't be here at all. I don't feel offended. It don't apply to tramps like you. Good. Then I can be going home right away. - Ah, you just try it. - Yeah. You wanna get shot? The kaiser and me-- Me and the kaiser felt just alike about this war. We didn't either of us want any war, so I'm going home. - He's there already. - Somebody must have wanted it. Maybe it was the English. No, I don't want to shoot any Englishmen. I never saw one till I came up here. And I suppose most of them never saw a German till they came up here. - No, I'm sure they weren't asked about it. - No. Well... it must be doing somebody some good. - Not me and the kaiser. - I think maybe the kaiser wanted a war. You leave us out of this! I don't see that. The kaiser's got everything he needs. Well, he never had a war before. Every full-grown emperor needs one war to make him famous. - Why, that's history. - Yeah, generals too. They need war. And manufacturers. They get rich. I think it's more a kind of fever. Nobody wants it in particular... and then all at once, there it is. We didn't want it. The English didn't want it. And here we are fighting. I'll tell you how it should all be done. Whenever there's a big war comin' on... - you should rope off a big field-- - And sell tickets. Yeah. And-- And on the big day... you should take all the kings and their cabinets and their generals... put them in the centre dressed in their underpants... and let 'em fight it out with clubs. The best country wins. Well, now that Kat's settled everything, let's go see Kemmerick. - Something interesting might happen on the way. - Might cheer him up. Boys, me and the kaiser want you back in time to march tomorrow. Don't forget. - We'll be back. - Give the boy my regards. There he is. - Hello, Kemmerick. - How are ya? - How's it going? - How are things going? - Are they looking after you all right? How are they treating you? Franz? They're robbers here. Robbers. They stole my watch! I always told you, nobody should carry as good a watch as that. - They took it while I was under ether! - Franz, you'll get it back. Do you feel all right? -Just look at my hand. - That's because you lost so much blood. -Just eat decently and you'll get well again. - Oh, no. You must eat. That's the main thing. It looks good too.