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Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact

I said, "Sure, yeah. Great." So I went over to grab a glass, and I am not kidding you,I...

I said, "Sure, yeah. Great." So I went over to grab a glass, and I am not kidding you,
I turn around, and he's like this

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.585
I said, "Sure, yeah. Great."
00:00:02.668 --> 00:00:04.042
So I went over to grab a glass,
00:00:04.092 --> 00:00:08.632
and I am not kidding you, I turn around, and he's like this.
Duration
10 seconds
Views
39
Timestamp in Movie
00:12:21
Uploaded
Apr 13, 2025
Genres
documentary, comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

In her new comedy special, Emergency Contact, Amy Schumer once again talks about her life in an uncensored and hilarious way.
People just clean it up and act like it didn't happen. Keep it moving. - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:05
People just clean it up and act like it didn't happen. ...
I'm trying to fill the air, but I kept on talking about vision by accident. - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:06
I'm trying to fill the air, but I kept on talking about...
I... I actually said this sentence, okay, to a blind person. - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:05
I... I actually said this sentence, okay, to a blind person.
I said, "Is anyone watching The Watcher?" - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:07
I said, "Is anyone watching The Watcher?"
I said, "How long have you guys been seeing each other?" Fucking fuck. - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:05
I said, "How long have you guys been seeing each other?...
I'm like, "Let me guess, she's an old soul." - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:08
I'm like, "Let me guess, she's an old soul.&q...
Twenty-three-year-old pussy, but what an old soul on the gal. - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:05
Twenty-three-year-old pussy, but what an old soul on the gal...
Okay? And if there's gonna be one group of people that's really mad at me, - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:09
Okay? And if there's gonna be one group of people that&...
People ask, "Is this a dangerous time for comedians?" - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:09
People ask, "Is this a dangerous time for comedians?&qu...
When they ask, I'm like, "Yes." - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:06
When they ask, I'm like, "Yes."
Like, no. Not if you're me, you know. - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:05
Like, no. Not if you're me, you know.
I'm like, "My people are like me. Okay?" - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:07
I'm like, "My people are like me. Okay?"
I think I'm just getting used to failing. - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:05
I think I'm just getting used to failing.
I don't think anybody's failed as hard as I did, as quickly, though. - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:06
I don't think anybody's failed as hard as I did, a...
Okay? Gene. Basic. We named him after my husband's mom, - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:09
Okay? Gene. Basic. We named him after my husband's mom,
But also, to not... - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:05
But also, to not...
That's why I, Amy, didn't take it. - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:05
That's why I, Amy, didn't take it.
Google "Amy Fisher" when you get home. And, uh, it's not good. So... - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:06
Google "Amy Fisher" when you get home. And, uh, it...
That's where I fucked up. Okay? I, uh, - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:09
That's where I fucked up. Okay? I, uh,
So we gave him the middle name "Attell." - Amy Schumer: Emergency Contact 00:12
So we gave him the middle name "Attell."