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Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward

That way, you don't have to say anything." But what do you get for someone who's just had...

That way, you don't have to say anything." But what do you get for someone who's just had an abortion?

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.461
That way, you don't have to say anything."
00:00:04.042 --> 00:00:05.922
But what do you get
00:00:06.339 --> 00:00:08.382
for someone who's just had an abortion?
Duration
8 seconds
Views
25
Timestamp in Movie
00:57:14
Uploaded
Jun 05, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
A24

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Movie Summary

Forging his own comedic boundaries, Anthony Jeselnik revels in getting away with saying things others can't in this stand-up special shot in New York.
A website popped up - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:06
A website popped up
'Cause my first thought, - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:06
'Cause my first thought,
Turns out it's actually never been a thing. - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:04
Turns out it's actually never been a thing.
My second thought: - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:04
My second thought:
Flowers are more of a romantic gesture, - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:06
Flowers are more of a romantic gesture,
Do not put her through that on this day." - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:11
Do not put her through that on this day."
I feel like we can all agree the worst gift you could get someone - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:11
I feel like we can all agree the worst gift you could get so...
The answer is "to-go box." - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:07
The answer is "to-go box."
That would be a real bucket of cold water - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:07
That would be a real bucket of cold water
Only one gift is appropriate - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:06
Only one gift is appropriate
And that is... a succulent. - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:05
And that is... a succulent.
-Do you know what a succulent is? - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:04
-Do you know what a succulent is?
If you don't know, a succulent is a desert plant. - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:05
If you don't know, a succulent is a desert plant.
It's a plant that gets its nutrients from the air. Give her that. - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:05
It's a plant that gets its nutrients from the air. Give...
I said, "Absolutely not." - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:06
I said, "Absolutely not."
Here's something else you never have to take care of." - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:04
Here's something else you never have to take care of.&q...
I just stood up, - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:07
I just stood up,
I sat next to her on her couch, - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:06
I sat next to her on her couch,
...I was still there next to her, - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:06
...I was still there next to her,
Now, - Anthony Jeselnik: Fire in the Maternity Ward 00:16
Now,