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"BASEketball" quotes

BASEketball poster
Two childhood friends are pro athletes of a national sport called BASEketball, a hybrid of baseball and basketball, and must deal with a greedy businessman scheming against their team.

Director: David Zucker
Writer: David Zucker, Robert LoCash, Lewis Friedman
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy, sport
Year: 1998
MetaScore: 38/100
ImdbRating: 6.5
BoxOffice: $7,027,290
Released: 31 Jul 1998
Awards: 2 nominations

61 video clips

Ted DenslowBob CostasDan PatrickKenny MayneEd TuttleNarratorSurgeonSurgery NurseJenna ReedReferee 1Referee 2Al MichaelsJoey ThomasLittle CoopBaxter CainDale EarnhardtJoe CooperDoug RemerTim MccarverReggie JacksonHospital Nurse
Your bed's over here - BASEketball 00:37 Your bed's over here We win and they get the chicks That sucks dude - BASEketball 00:12 We win and they get the chicks That sucks dude Look I'm sorry but if you want unanimous consent - BASEketball 00:06 Look I'm sorry but if you want unanimous consent You know something Pig Fucker Can I call you Pig Fucker - BASEketball 00:07 You know something Pig Fucker Can I call you Pig Fucker Now you kids with your loud music and your Dan Fogelberg - BASEketball 00:17 Now you kids with your loud music and your Dan Fogelberg What's the one thing that you want - BASEketball 00:17 What's the one thing that you want And joining us in the booth this evening - BASEketball 00:26 And joining us in the booth this evening So go ahead Go back to your fancy cars and your big bank accounts - BASEketball 00:16 So go ahead Go back to your fancy cars and your big bank... With the first seven months of the BASEketball post season out of the way - BASEketball 00:44 With the first seven months of the BASEketball post season... I'm not going out with his sister - BASEketball 00:16 I'm not going out with his sister Dude I'm not gonna cave in End of story dude - BASEketball 00:15 Dude I'm not gonna cave in End of story dude I guess that's why she didn't move around a lot - BASEketball 00:06 I guess that's why she didn't move around a lot Switchblades Colored red balloons - BASEketball 00:16 Switchblades Colored red balloons Thanks a lot Dr Dickhead You totally fucked me there - BASEketball 00:28 Thanks a lot Dr Dickhead You totally fucked me there Really What - BASEketball 00:13 Really What Has there been any change in his fluid intake - BASEketball 00:12 Has there been any change in his fluid intake Where are those little heart paddle things that George Clooney uses - BASEketball 00:45 Where are those little heart paddle things that George... Shoot for it What are you insane - BASEketball 00:37 Shoot for it What are you insane Hey I'll come by I like hospitals - BASEketball 00:12 Hey I'll come by I like hospitals You're excited Feel these nipples - BASEketball 00:09 You're excited Feel these nipples Oh one of Brittany's mom's pubic hairs - BASEketball 00:14 Oh one of Brittany's mom's pubic hairs Yeah I've been the director of the Dream Come True Foundation - BASEketball 00:15 Yeah I've been the director of the Dream Come True... Hey Watson have you seen those uh beer commercials - BASEketball 00:21 Hey Watson have you seen those uh beer commercials Hey Pete what's the matter with Coop tonight - BASEketball 00:10 Hey Pete what's the matter with Coop tonight If I had a nickel for every time - BASEketball 00:11 If I had a nickel for every time Hey Grumsky you losing weight - BASEketball 00:18 Hey Grumsky you losing weight Hard to believe that just five years ago this game was played only on driveways - BASEketball 00:12 Hard to believe that just five years ago this game was... Sometimes I forget why I play the game - BASEketball 00:25 Sometimes I forget why I play the game You said no more Journey psyche outs - BASEketball 00:06 You said no more Journey psyche outs It's fat liposuctioned out of Marlon Brando's ass - BASEketball 00:17 It's fat liposuctioned out of Marlon Brando's ass Joey Look who's here - BASEketball 00:08 Joey Look who's here Well I've always dreamed of big game hunting - BASEketball 00:23 Well I've always dreamed of big game hunting I wanna feel you - BASEketball 00:08 I wanna feel you What's this guy - BASEketball 00:11 What's this guy Coop you know what Miss Reed told me tonight - BASEketball 00:14 Coop you know what Miss Reed told me tonight Steve Perry - BASEketball 00:06 Steve Perry I'm so scared Man I Listen to me you little bitch - BASEketball 00:10 I'm so scared Man I Listen to me you little bitch And you guys took me in - BASEketball 00:36 And you guys took me in And those warts on your dick aren't going to go away - BASEketball 00:12 And those warts on your dick aren't going to go away Hi there I'm Dan Patrick And I'm Kenny Mayne - BASEketball 00:44 Hi there I'm Dan Patrick And I'm Kenny Mayne What an unfortunate thing to happen on Dozen Egg Night - BASEketball 00:06 What an unfortunate thing to happen on Dozen Egg Night Yeah if anyone should get the psyche out it should be Denslow - BASEketball 00:12 Yeah if anyone should get the psyche out it should be... Mr Squeak What - BASEketball 00:06 Mr Squeak What Don when I see one of BASEketball's hottest stars - BASEketball 00:17 Don when I see one of BASEketball's hottest stars Do you think Shaq got rich playing in Orlando - BASEketball 00:33 Do you think Shaq got rich playing in Orlando I think he's sleeping - BASEketball 00:08 I think he's sleeping Wake up bitch You're my new best friend - BASEketball 00:13 Wake up bitch You're my new best friend With that new liver he should be peeing like a champ in no time huh - BASEketball 00:13 With that new liver he should be peeing like a champ in no... Excuse me driver do you think you could go any faster - BASEketball 00:09 Excuse me driver do you think you could go any faster It's not like he's asking you to hit two home runs - BASEketball 00:06 It's not like he's asking you to hit two home runs At this time I'd like to ask everyone to leave the room - BASEketball 00:57 At this time I'd like to ask everyone to leave the room Here's your decaf mocha Jenna - BASEketball 00:15 Here's your decaf mocha Jenna A guy Yeah that's a dude - BASEketball 00:25 A guy Yeah that's a dude But what Joey really needs to know - BASEketball 00:39 But what Joey really needs to know What the hell are you talking about You don't care about Jenna - BASEketball 00:17 What the hell are you talking about You don't care... God damn it Remer I told you this was going to happen didn't I - BASEketball 00:59 God damn it Remer I told you this was going to happen... Hey Want to do an interview with me - BASEketball 00:12 Hey Want to do an interview with me Oh Coop Coop I know this is a dark time for you - BASEketball 00:24 Oh Coop Coop I know this is a dark time for you I brought this for you I saw some kid try to leave the ballpark with it - BASEketball 00:17 I brought this for you I saw some kid try to leave the... I don't have your fucking ball - BASEketball 00:12 I don't have your fucking ball Oh why Why Why - BASEketball 00:26 Oh why Why Why

Cast

Joe Cooper - Trey Parker
Doug Remer - Matt Stone
Squeak Scolari - Dian Bachar
Jenna Reed - Yasmine Bleeth
Yvette Denslow - Jenny McCarthy-Wahlberg
All Cast