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[the Devil shows up on Elliot's computer screen] Elliot Richards:
What are you doing here? The Devil:
Just think of me as a computer virus. Elliot Richards:
I think of you as a PLAGUE! Now will you get off my screen! I have work to do! The Devil:
Whoa, whoa, what's this "get thee behind me" thing? [frowns] The Devil:
We still have business here, Mr. Richards. Elliot Richards:
No, not now. I told you, I've got work to do. And besides, I've only got two wishes left. The Devil:
Correction: you have one wish left. Elliot Richards:
[chuckles in disbelief]
Nice try. I've got two more coming. The Devil:
Nuh-uh. Count 'em, baby. You were President of the United States. Elliot Richards:
[rolling his eyes, holding up one finger]
Yeah, okay, one. The Devil:
You were a handsome, articulate, celebrated author and raconteur. Elliot Richards:
[now holding up two fingers]
Yeah, and you turned me into a flaming homosexual. The Devil:
Pro basketball player. Elliot Richards:
[holds up three fingers]
Three. The Devil:
The caring, artistic guy was four. Elliot Richards:
[holding up four fingers]
And the Columbian drug lord was five! That means I have two more coming. The Devil:
You forgot the Big Mac and Coke. Elliot Richards:
[again chuckling in disbelief]
What? That wasn't a wish. The Devil:
Well, what would you call it? You said, "I wish," and I got it for you. Sounds like a wish to me. Elliot Richards:
[now peeved]
No! No, no, no, no. That's not fair. The Devil:
[angry]
Fair? Who do you think you're talking to? I don't recall anybody accusing me of being fair before. I think I'm insulted! Elliot Richards:
What? No. This isn't right! You can't do this! The Devil:
What are you gonna do? Sue me? Elliot Richards:
No, that's it! I've had it with you! The whole deal is off. Off!
What are you doing here? The Devil:
Just think of me as a computer virus. Elliot Richards:
I think of you as a PLAGUE! Now will you get off my screen! I have work to do! The Devil:
Whoa, whoa, what's this "get thee behind me" thing? [frowns] The Devil:
We still have business here, Mr. Richards. Elliot Richards:
No, not now. I told you, I've got work to do. And besides, I've only got two wishes left. The Devil:
Correction: you have one wish left. Elliot Richards:
[chuckles in disbelief]
Nice try. I've got two more coming. The Devil:
Nuh-uh. Count 'em, baby. You were President of the United States. Elliot Richards:
[rolling his eyes, holding up one finger]
Yeah, okay, one. The Devil:
You were a handsome, articulate, celebrated author and raconteur. Elliot Richards:
[now holding up two fingers]
Yeah, and you turned me into a flaming homosexual. The Devil:
Pro basketball player. Elliot Richards:
[holds up three fingers]
Three. The Devil:
The caring, artistic guy was four. Elliot Richards:
[holding up four fingers]
And the Columbian drug lord was five! That means I have two more coming. The Devil:
You forgot the Big Mac and Coke. Elliot Richards:
[again chuckling in disbelief]
What? That wasn't a wish. The Devil:
Well, what would you call it? You said, "I wish," and I got it for you. Sounds like a wish to me. Elliot Richards:
[now peeved]
No! No, no, no, no. That's not fair. The Devil:
[angry]
Fair? Who do you think you're talking to? I don't recall anybody accusing me of being fair before. I think I'm insulted! Elliot Richards:
What? No. This isn't right! You can't do this! The Devil:
What are you gonna do? Sue me? Elliot Richards:
No, that's it! I've had it with you! The whole deal is off. Off!
Full Transcript
00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.956
We still have business here
00:00:03.252 --> 00:00:06.005
No not now I told you I've got work to do
00:00:06.038 --> 00:00:08.974
And besides I've only got two wishes left
00:00:09.466 --> 00:00:11.582
Correction You have one wish left
00:00:13.512 --> 00:00:14.911
Nice try
00:00:15.222 --> 00:00:18.737
I've got two more coming No Count them baby
00:00:19.101 --> 00:00:22.537
You were president Yeah okay one
00:00:22.897 --> 00:00:26.526
You were a handsome articulate celebrated author and raconteur
00:00:26.901 --> 00:00:29.734
Yeah and you turned me into a flaming homosexual
00:00:30.237 --> 00:00:31.829
Pro basketball player Three
00:00:32.114 --> 00:00:35.743
The caring artistic guy was four The Colombian drug lord was five
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Movie Summary
Hopeless dweeb Elliot Richards is granted seven wishes by the Devil to snare Allison, the girl of his dreams, in exchange for his soul.

