"Better Off Dead" quotes

Better Off Dead poster
High school student Lane Meyer sinks into suicidal depression when his girlfriend dumps him for jock Roy Stalin, the high school ski racing champion. Meanwhile, he has to deal with his eccentric family, a tenacious paperboy and an obnoxious neighbor whose mother is hosting a beautiful French exchange student named Monique.

Director: Savage Steve Holland
Writer: Savage Steve Holland
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy
Year: 1985
MetaScore: 51/100
ImdbRating: 7.1
BoxOffice: $10,297,601
Released: 11 Oct 1985
Awards: N/A

84 Clips

Gee I'm real sorry your mom blew up Ricky - Better Off Dead 00:05
Gee I'm real sorry your mom blew up Ricky
Those are the keys to this establishment - Better Off Dead 00:13
Those are the keys to this establishment
Do you have Christmas in France - Better Off Dead 00:12
Do you have Christmas in France
One night with me and she'll probably go blind with ecstasy - Better Off Dead 00:14
One night with me and she'll probably go blind with ecstasy
Hello How was your day - Better Off Dead 00:08
Hello How was your day
Do something to him - Better Off Dead 00:05
Do something to him
How was your day - Better Off Dead 00:08
How was your day
That makes sense - Better Off Dead 00:05
That makes sense
I just wanted to thank you - Better Off Dead 00:10
I just wanted to thank you
Well you'll make a fine little helper - Better Off Dead 00:18
Well you'll make a fine little helper
We'll beat that slope together - Better Off Dead 00:09
We'll beat that slope together
It's got raisins in it - Better Off Dead 00:09
It's got raisins in it
You'd make a fine little helper - Better Off Dead 00:08
You'd make a fine little helper
Well you sure have my vote for cutest couple - Better Off Dead 00:09
Well you sure have my vote for cutest couple
Language lessons - Better Off Dead 00:16
Language lessons
It's real aardvark fur - Better Off Dead 00:05
It's real aardvark fur
I want my two dollars - Better Off Dead 00:05
I want my two dollars
You're the hottest thing since sunburns - Better Off Dead 00:05
You're the hottest thing since sunburns
I think all you need is a small taste of success - Better Off Dead 00:06
I think all you need is a small taste of success
You look pretty stupid to me - Better Off Dead 00:06
You look pretty stupid to me
He just sits around crocheting all day and snorting nasal spray - Better Off Dead 00:18
He just sits around crocheting all day and snorting nasal...
I think I just froze the left half of my brain - Better Off Dead 00:34
I think I just froze the left half of my brain
The mail got wet in the rain - Better Off Dead 00:19
The mail got wet in the rain
Frawnch dressing - Better Off Dead 00:20
Frawnch dressing
I already had breakfast - Better Off Dead 00:11
I already had breakfast
That you're a Dodgers fan - Better Off Dead 00:05
That you're a Dodgers fan
I have great fear of tools - Better Off Dead 00:11
I have great fear of tools
I'm really sorry your mom blew up - Better Off Dead 00:11
I'm really sorry your mom blew up
And dying when you're not really sick - Better Off Dead 00:06
And dying when you're not really sick
Suicide is never the answer - Better Off Dead 00:05
Suicide is never the answer
Greendale is a bodaciously small town - Better Off Dead 00:13
Greendale is a bodaciously small town
The K 12 dude - Better Off Dead 00:11
The K 12 dude
Truly a sight to behold - Better Off Dead 00:25
Truly a sight to behold
What's a little boy like you doing with big boy smut like this - Better Off Dead 00:07
What's a little boy like you doing with big boy smut like...
I thought if Casanova and I had nothing to say to each other - Better Off Dead 00:25
I thought if Casanova and I had nothing to say to each other
She only speaks French - Better Off Dead 00:05
She only speaks French
I want my two dollars - Better Off Dead 00:05
I want my two dollars
One speaks no English - Better Off Dead 00:12
One speaks no English
This is pure snow It's everywhere - Better Off Dead 00:09
This is pure snow It's everywhere
Johnny - Better Off Dead 00:43
Johnny
Go that way really fast - Better Off Dead 00:11
Go that way really fast
I'm real sorry your mom blew up - Better Off Dead 00:05
I'm real sorry your mom blew up
Tsk Man now that's a real shame when folks be throwing away - Better Off Dead 00:09
Tsk Man now that's a real shame when folks be throwing away
Lane I've been going to this high school for seven and a half years - Better Off Dead 00:13
Lane I've been going to this high school for seven and a...
Two dollars - Better Off Dead 00:04
Two dollars
What's that - Better Off Dead 00:13
What's that
Do you have Christmas in France - Better Off Dead 00:09
Do you have Christmas in France
Who'd like to hold my clipboard Me Me - Better Off Dead 00:18
Who'd like to hold my clipboard Me Me
Do something to him - Better Off Dead 00:04
Do something to him
Buck up little camper - Better Off Dead 00:09
Buck up little camper
You see it's got raisins in it - Better Off Dead 00:09
You see it's got raisins in it
Him And her Mm hmm Mm hmm - Better Off Dead 00:07
Him And her Mm hmm Mm hmm
Well you sure got my vote for cutest couple - Better Off Dead 00:09
Well you sure got my vote for cutest couple
It's real aardvark fur - Better Off Dead 00:04
It's real aardvark fur
Monique I just wanted to thank you for everything - Better Off Dead 00:10
Monique I just wanted to thank you for everything
You fiend Man you're the hottest thing since sunburn - Better Off Dead 00:06
You fiend Man you're the hottest thing since sunburn
You'll make a fine little helper What's your name - Better Off Dead 00:08
You'll make a fine little helper What's your name
Language lessons - Better Off Dead 00:09
Language lessons
I think all you need is a small taste of success - Better Off Dead 00:08
I think all you need is a small taste of success
Wait a minute Hold it - Better Off Dead 00:34
Wait a minute Hold it
First we have - Better Off Dead 00:20
First we have
You look pretty stupid to me Thank you - Better Off Dead 00:06
You look pretty stupid to me Thank you
Suicide is never the answer little trooper - Better Off Dead 00:06
Suicide is never the answer little trooper
Greendale is a bodaciously small town - Better Off Dead 00:13
Greendale is a bodaciously small town
I got the recipe from the Ladies' Home Journal - Better Off Dead 00:19
I got the recipe from the Ladies' Home Journal
Hello Hello - Better Off Dead 00:12
Hello Hello
Then you will not tell That you're a Dodgers fan - Better Off Dead 00:05
Then you will not tell That you're a Dodgers fan
I have a great fear of tools I once made a birdhouse in wood shop - Better Off Dead 00:10
I have a great fear of tools I once made a birdhouse in wood...
I'm real sorry your mom blew up Ricky Doctor said she'll be okay - Better Off Dead 00:10
I'm real sorry your mom blew up Ricky Doctor said she'll be...
Truly a sight to behold a man beaten - Better Off Dead 00:25
Truly a sight to behold a man beaten
I gotta do it He snorts nasal spray - Better Off Dead 00:09
I gotta do it He snorts nasal spray
What's a little boy like you doing with big boy smut like this - Better Off Dead 00:06
What's a little boy like you doing with big boy smut like...
She only speaks French Roy She doesn't speak imbecile - Better Off Dead 00:05
She only speaks French Roy She doesn't speak imbecile
I don't know Brothers One speaks no English - Better Off Dead 00:13
I don't know Brothers One speaks no English
This is pure snow It's everywhere - Better Off Dead 00:09
This is pure snow It's everywhere
Twenty papers That's two dollars - Better Off Dead 00:36
Twenty papers That's two dollars
I'm real sorry your mom blew up Ricky Doctor said she'll be okay - Better Off Dead 00:07
I'm real sorry your mom blew up Ricky Doctor said she'll be...
Go that way really fast - Better Off Dead 00:10
Go that way really fast
Man it's a real shame when folks be throwin' away - Better Off Dead 00:08
Man it's a real shame when folks be throwin' away
I've been going to this high school for 71 2 years - Better Off Dead 00:11
I've been going to this high school for 71 2 years
If something gets in your way - Better Off Dead 00:13
If something gets in your way
I know high school girls - Better Off Dead 00:25
I know high school girls
This is pure snow - Better Off Dead 00:26
This is pure snow
That's two dollars - Better Off Dead 01:16
That's two dollars

Cast

Lane Meyer - John Cusack
Jenny Meyer - Kim Darby
Johnny Gasparini - Demian Slade
Badger Meyer - Scooter Stevens
Monique Junot - Diane Franklin
Mrs. Smith - Laura Waterbury
Ricky Smith - Dan Schneider
Yee Sook Ree - Yuji Okumoto
Chen Ree - Brian Imada
Beth Truss - Amanda Wyss
Charles De Mar - Curtis Armstrong
Roy Stalin - Aaron Dozier
Roy's Ski Buddy #1 - Frank Burt Avalon
Roy's Ski Buddy #2 - Joe W. Davis
Roy's Ski Buddy #3 - Peter Ellenstein
Mr. Kerber - Vincent Schiavelli
Buster - Edward Mehler
Roller Skater - Thomas Rollerson
Nerd #1 - Toby Iland
Nerd #2 (as Jonathon Charles Fox) - Jonathan Charles Fox
Nerd #3 - Darren Harris
Jock #1 - Randy Stoklos
Jock #2 - Sam High
Jock #3 - David Vaughn
Chris Cummins - Tina Littlewood
Tree Trimmer - Steven Williams
Tree Trimmer's Helper - Stuart K. Robinson
Mailman - Taylor Negron
Joanne Greenwald - Rima Lyn
Elizabeth Daily - Elizabeth Daily
The Band - Ron Anello
The Band - Dominick Certo
The Band - Jude Cole
The Band - Robert Gianette
Backup Singer - Angie Rubin
Paperboy - Yano Anaya
Paperboy - Joey Tushnet
Paperboy - Sebastian Dungan
Additional Voices (voice) - Rich Little
Student - Catherine Fitz
Student - Stevie Mack