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Birdies

Maybe you people haven't realized this, but your new golf prois a convicted felon, an...

Maybe you people haven't realized this, but your new golf pro
is a convicted felon, an alcoholic and a drug addict

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.589
Maybe you people haven't realized this,
00:00:04.589 --> 00:00:07.743
but your new golf pro is a convicted felon,
00:00:08.092 --> 00:00:12.885
an alcoholic and a drug addict.
Duration
14 seconds
Views
27
Timestamp in Movie
00:32:03
Uploaded
Mar 29, 2025
Genres
comedy, sport
Production
Lighthouse Films,Crane House Film

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Movie Summary

Twin Pines, a failing country club where maintaining a buzz is par for the course, hires a new Golf Pro to help them get back on track before their rivals at the snooty Magnolia Pointe puts them out of business for good.
Trying to figure out what happened to this shithole. - Birdies 00:05
Trying to figure out what happened to this shithole.
Hey sweetie, how about three beers, stat. - Birdies 00:05
Hey sweetie, how about three beers, stat.
(they laugh) - Birdies 00:05
(they laugh)
(both laugh) - Birdies 00:06
(both laugh)
I promise you Baxter, I am a huge asshole. - Birdies 00:05
I promise you Baxter, I am a huge asshole.
So just absorb that negativity, turn it into something good. - Birdies 00:06
So just absorb that negativity, turn it into something good.
Can you come with me though just 'cause you can, - Birdies 00:07
Can you come with me though just 'cause you can,
Jake, I cannot wait to see how you perform in competition. - Birdies 00:05
Jake, I cannot wait to see how you perform in competition.
10 hookers from just like the yellow pages. - Birdies 00:07
10 hookers from just like the yellow pages.
But then also a pound of weed, half a gallon of jack. - Birdies 00:06
But then also a pound of weed, half a gallon of jack.
133 beers, I think they counted, and ounce of coke. - Birdies 00:07
133 beers, I think they counted, and ounce of coke.
So we did that and then poppers and then half a tab of acid. - Birdies 00:06
So we did that and then poppers and then half a tab of acid.
I invited her into bed with us and then she knew - Birdies 00:09
I invited her into bed with us and then she knew
You're together seven years, - Birdies 00:06
You're together seven years,
So back to this whole you not playing golf - Birdies 00:06
So back to this whole you not playing golf
Can we get you back out for another round or five tomorrow. - Birdies 00:06
Can we get you back out for another round or five tomorrow.
Jake, historically, we've not had the best relationship - Birdies 00:07
Jake, historically, we've not had the best relationship
You know the rumors that he's in the closet - Birdies 00:05
You know the rumors that he's in the closet
(car engine revving) - Birdies 00:05
(car engine revving)
If you quit, you have sex again. - Birdies 00:06
If you quit, you have sex again.