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Blood Relatives

A vampire's loner lifestyle is thrown into disarray when a teenager shows up claiming to be his daughter, and she's got the fangs to prove it. On a road trip across America's blacktops, they decide how to sink their teeth into fam...

Director

Noah Segan

Year

Genre

Box Office

N/A

Production

Paper Street Pictures,Nocturnal Kid

Awards

1 nomination

Cast information not available.

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Explore 199 Clips

When we met, - Blood Relatives

And you know I think
it's a miracle, - Blood Relatives

And you know I think it's a miracle,

That's a debate we've
had ever since - Blood Relatives

That's a debate we've had ever since

Thank goodness we had
something in common, - Blood Relatives

Thank goodness we had something in common,

It belongs to both of
you, and that's family. - Blood Relatives

It belongs to both of you, and that's family.

I'm not mad, I'm, - Blood Relatives

I'm not mad, I'm,

You're absolutely sure you're
never coming back here. - Blood Relatives

You're absolutely sure you're never coming back he...

Fuck no, - Blood Relatives

May the corpses we burn
lead the way. - Blood Relatives

May the corpses we burn lead the way.

I guess, have you ever tried
to avoid people for meals? - Blood Relatives

I guess, have you ever tried to avoid people for meals?

Yeah, it's doable, but
it doesn't feel good. - Blood Relatives

Yeah, it's doable, but it doesn't feel good.

Affects my metabolism,
I get paunchy, - Blood Relatives

Affects my metabolism, I get paunchy,

Yeah, - Blood Relatives

And why the fuck would
you bother schlipping- - Blood Relatives

And why the fuck would you bother schlipping-

Clearly, you didn't
think this through, - Blood Relatives

Clearly, you didn't think this through,

You can imagine how I
feel as a vampire, - Blood Relatives

You can imagine how I feel as a vampire,

Plus, it might be good to
be with somebody - Blood Relatives

Plus, it might be good to be with somebody

This feels like a hard sell,
or blackmail. - Blood Relatives

This feels like a hard sell, or blackmail.

Or maybe just facing some
semblance of responsibility - Blood Relatives

Or maybe just facing some semblance of responsibility

What do you suggest that I- - Blood Relatives

What do you suggest that I-

Well, we need to live somewhere, - Blood Relatives

Well, we need to live somewhere,

You need a birth certificate,
so you can get a license, - Blood Relatives

You need a birth certificate, so you can get a license,

You'd have to get that
from an actual person, - Blood Relatives

You'd have to get that from an actual person,

That thing tell you how far
we are from Sunbeam, Colorado? - Blood Relatives

That thing tell you how far we are from Sunbeam, Colorado?

I think I know someone - Blood Relatives

I think I know someone

I was driving through
the Rockies, - Blood Relatives

I was driving through the Rockies,

She's on the run from
some scumbag, - Blood Relatives

She's on the run from some scumbag,

First person that I see,
I go for. - Blood Relatives

First person that I see, I go for.

I barely bit him before I saw
his lanyard, camp counselor. - Blood Relatives

I barely bit him before I saw his lanyard, camp counselor.

Yeah, you're his niece, - Blood Relatives

Yeah, you're his niece,

See if you can find out
where they keep the records, - Blood Relatives

See if you can find out where they keep the records,

A little while later, - Blood Relatives

A little while later,

Well, there's this
thing I can do. - Blood Relatives

Well, there's this thing I can do.

He thinks he's a, - Blood Relatives

He thinks he's a,

Anyway, they send him to
an institution, for life. - Blood Relatives

Anyway, they send him to an institution, for life.

Well, I'm a looking for a
Roger Fieldner. - Blood Relatives

Well, I'm a looking for a Roger Fieldner.

I was in the area visiting
a friend and my mom said, - Blood Relatives

I was in the area visiting a friend and my mom said,

Of course he hasn't
had much to say - Blood Relatives

Of course he hasn't had much to say

Yeah. Good, good old Uncle- - Blood Relatives

Yeah. Good, good old Uncle-

You know, I, - Blood Relatives

Seeing a family member
can be very therapeutic. - Blood Relatives

Seeing a family member can be very therapeutic.

He comes out to watch Judge
Judy and Judge Joe Brown, - Blood Relatives

He comes out to watch Judge Judy and Judge Joe Brown,

I, I, I, I don't know. - Blood Relatives

I, I, I, I don't know.

Me and him, - Blood Relatives

The smell of his leather jacket, - Blood Relatives

The smell of his leather jacket,

I've been waiting for
this moment for so long. - Blood Relatives

I've been waiting for this moment for so long.

Buddy, I don't think - Blood Relatives

Buddy, I don't think

My liege, my king in leather. - Blood Relatives

My liege, my king in leather.

Anything, just give me a taste. - Blood Relatives

Anything, just give me a taste.

Hey, you know you could have
just done the staring thing. - Blood Relatives

Hey, you know you could have just done the staring thing.

Yeah, that guy's not
going anywhere, anytime. - Blood Relatives

Yeah, that guy's not going anywhere, anytime.

You show up in
photos and videos. - Blood Relatives

You show up in photos and videos.

Skies the other day, - Blood Relatives

Skies the other day,

I know, but I think I dropped
my keys earlier, inside. - Blood Relatives

I know, but I think I dropped my keys earlier, inside.

Oh man, I gotta be at work
in the morning, real early, - Blood Relatives

Oh man, I gotta be at work in the morning, real early,

It's very important, and so
could I come in and look. - Blood Relatives

It's very important, and so could I come in and look.

Hey man, could we please
just come in for a second, - Blood Relatives

Hey man, could we please just come in for a second,

This is exactly why mom
left you, you're such a bum. - Blood Relatives

This is exactly why mom left you, you're such a bum.

Uh, - Blood Relatives

I'm not gonna like get on
the ground or anything, - Blood Relatives

I'm not gonna like get on the ground or anything,

Hey, - Blood Relatives

You know she just
wouldn't like get in line - Blood Relatives

You know she just wouldn't like get in line

You know, now I hear she's
screwing- - Blood Relatives

You know, now I hear she's screwing-

Yeah and, - Blood Relatives

And there you, alright. - Blood Relatives

And there you, alright.

They just want an army - Blood Relatives

They just want an army

If you can get it all done,
I don't care when you work. - Blood Relatives

If you can get it all done, I don't care when you work.

You look like your dressed
as the Fonz for Halloween, - Blood Relatives

You look like your dressed as the Fonz for Halloween,

I can't tell if I'm schvitzing - Blood Relatives

I can't tell if I'm schvitzing

Well, since you were
homeschooled, - Blood Relatives

Well, since you were homeschooled,

And, uh, we also have some
programs that may interest you, - Blood Relatives

And, uh, we also have some programs that may interest you,

Told you that's what happens
when I eat dead stock. - Blood Relatives

Told you that's what happens when I eat dead stock.

Wanna catch an early
movie tonight? - Blood Relatives

Wanna catch an early movie tonight?

It isn't what I want from
you, it's what we have to do. - Blood Relatives

It isn't what I want from you, it's what we have t...

We have something to hide, - Blood Relatives

We have something to hide,

Your dream of finally going
from boring dad to fun brother. - Blood Relatives

Your dream of finally going from boring dad to fun brother.

Just think, you'll
eventually be my son, - Blood Relatives

Just think, you'll eventually be my son,

Look around, look at
my fucking gut, - Blood Relatives

Look around, look at my fucking gut,

Hi, my name is Roger, - Blood Relatives

Hi, my name is Roger,

Her mother raised her,
raised her well, - Blood Relatives

Her mother raised her, raised her well,

So building that, - Blood Relatives

So building that,

It's hard to know if the
decisions that I'm making - Blood Relatives

It's hard to know if the decisions that I'm making

Could you elaborate on that,
Roger? - Blood Relatives

Could you elaborate on that, Roger?

I guess I mean, - Blood Relatives

I guess I mean,

But it doesn't change
the urge to- - Blood Relatives

But it doesn't change the urge to-

Or at least remember
who you were, - Blood Relatives

Or at least remember who you were,

Hey, - Blood Relatives

It seems like you're in the
middle of a major transition, - Blood Relatives

It seems like you're in the middle of a major transitio...

Find something that you
and your kid connect on, - Blood Relatives

Find something that you and your kid connect on,

I was thinking, maybe we could
go on a little field trip? - Blood Relatives

I was thinking, maybe we could go on a little field trip?

Blood Relatives poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

A vampire's loner lifestyle is thrown into disarray when a teenager shows up claiming to be his daughter, and she's got the fangs to prove it. On a road trip across America's blacktops, they decide how to sink their teeth into fam...

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: Noah Segan

Writer: Noah Segan

Production: Paper Street Pictures,Nocturnal Kid

Genre: comedy, horror

Year: 2022

MetaScore: 69/100

ImdbRating: 5.5

BoxOffice: N/A

Released: 22 Nov 2022

Awards: 1 nomination

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