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"Caddyshack" quotes

Caddyshack poster
An exclusive golf course has to deal with a brash new member and a destructive dancing gopher.

Director: Harold Ramis
Writer: Brian Doyle-Murray, Harold Ramis, Douglas Kenney
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy, sport
Year: 1980
MetaScore: 48/100
ImdbRating: 7.2
BoxOffice: $39,918,650
Released: 25 Jul 1980
Awards: 1 nomination
You know what this is called in the East - Caddyshack 00:38 You know what this is called in the East It's time to christen the sloop - Caddyshack 00:12 It's time to christen the sloop Forget the massage - Caddyshack 00:14 Forget the massage Great big gobs of greasy - Caddyshack 00:36 Great big gobs of greasy Dog food - Caddyshack 00:10 Dog food In one physical model of the universe the shortest distance between two points - Caddyshack 00:11 In one physical model of the universe the shortest distance... Let me just clean this up here - Caddyshack 00:12 Let me just clean this up here I should have stayed home and played with myself - Caddyshack 00:06 I should have stayed home and played with myself Who do you want - Caddyshack 00:14 Who do you want I'm a very qualified acupuncturist - Caddyshack 00:26 I'm a very qualified acupuncturist What do you stand for Danny - Caddyshack 00:09 What do you stand for Danny That kangaroo stole my ball - Caddyshack 00:07 That kangaroo stole my ball Spalding get your foot off the boat - Caddyshack 00:08 Spalding get your foot off the boat What kind of sh t is this - Caddyshack 00:10 What kind of sh t is this Can you make a Bullshot - Caddyshack 00:10 Can you make a Bullshot Yes Yes Winter rules Oh yes - Caddyshack 00:05 Yes Yes Winter rules Oh yes I got to get into this dude's pelt and crawl around for a few days - Caddyshack 00:13 I got to get into this dude's pelt and crawl around for... Waiting for these guys - Caddyshack 00:43 Waiting for these guys We're both starving - Caddyshack 00:33 We're both starving You're no gentleman - Caddyshack 00:13 You're no gentleman I tried calling - Caddyshack 00:16 I tried calling Here you are kid Park my car Get my bags - Caddyshack 00:08 Here you are kid Park my car Get my bags I'll tell you country clubs and cemeteries biggest wastes of prime real estate - Caddyshack 00:10 I'll tell you country clubs and cemeteries biggest... Freeze gopher - Caddyshack 00:11 Freeze gopher Now Maggie's pants - Caddyshack 00:08 Now Maggie's pants What do you stand for Danny - Caddyshack 00:14 What do you stand for Danny Who's you decorator - Caddyshack 00:22 Who's you decorator While we're young - Caddyshack 00:05 While we're young Look at the wax build up on those shoes - Caddyshack 00:22 Look at the wax build up on those shoes I'm going to put it right on the line - Caddyshack 00:23 I'm going to put it right on the line How about we go swimming - Caddyshack 00:17 How about we go swimming What do you do for excitement - Caddyshack 00:29 What do you do for excitement This is a hybrid This is a cross bluegrass - Caddyshack 00:40 This is a hybrid This is a cross bluegrass I just want you to know that you know because of this - Caddyshack 00:14 I just want you to know that you know because of this Guess I'm a little overdressed - Caddyshack 00:08 Guess I'm a little overdressed Great big globs of greasy - Caddyshack 00:08 Great big globs of greasy What's that sign say - Caddyshack 00:21 What's that sign say Don't include me in this - Caddyshack 00:20 Don't include me in this I had a couple of burgers and some Cokes for lunch - Caddyshack 00:25 I had a couple of burgers and some Cokes for lunch You put your suit on - Caddyshack 00:11 You put your suit on How many times have I spoken to you about your language - Caddyshack 00:32 How many times have I spoken to you about your language This is your fate line - Caddyshack 00:24 This is your fate line No one likes a tattletale - Caddyshack 00:07 No one likes a tattletale For not being pregnant - Caddyshack 00:09 For not being pregnant Doodie - Caddyshack 00:06 Doodie I can't pay you - Caddyshack 00:39 I can't pay you What did you shoot today - Caddyshack 00:19 What did you shoot today When your ship comes in - Caddyshack 00:30 When your ship comes in I should have yelled - Caddyshack 00:04 I should have yelled My dinghy's bigger than your whole boat - Caddyshack 00:08 My dinghy's bigger than your whole boat There You're crazy - Caddyshack 00:08 There You're crazy And all who sail on her - Caddyshack 00:12 And all who sail on her Don't put yourself down - Caddyshack 00:13 Don't put yourself down Would you come and loofa my stretch marks - Caddyshack 00:08 Would you come and loofa my stretch marks You demand satisfaction - Caddyshack 00:32 You demand satisfaction I bet you've got a lot of nice ties - Caddyshack 00:16 I bet you've got a lot of nice ties I thought you'd be the man to beat this year - Caddyshack 00:15 I thought you'd be the man to beat this year I got it from a Negro - Caddyshack 00:10 I got it from a Negro I have to laugh - Caddyshack 00:25 I have to laugh I was born to lick your face - Caddyshack 00:22 I was born to lick your face I smell varmint poontang - Caddyshack 00:12 I smell varmint poontang Are you going to Harvard - Caddyshack 00:40 Are you going to Harvard Your ball's right over there - Caddyshack 00:39 Your ball's right over there You scratched my anchor - Caddyshack 00:06 You scratched my anchor Let me tell you a little story - Caddyshack 00:35 Let me tell you a little story Say I'm having a little party at the Yacht Club this Sunday - Caddyshack 00:18 Say I'm having a little party at the Yacht Club this... And the colored boy who went to heaven - Caddyshack 00:19 And the colored boy who went to heaven Well I'll guarantee you'll never be a member here - Caddyshack 00:16 Well I'll guarantee you'll never be a member here That kangaroo just took my ball - Caddyshack 00:07 That kangaroo just took my ball I got a salami I gotta hide still - Caddyshack 00:07 I got a salami I gotta hide still What brings you to this nape of the woods - Caddyshack 00:14 What brings you to this nape of the woods I planned to go to law school after I graduated - Caddyshack 00:19 I planned to go to law school after I graduated Bark like a dog - Caddyshack 00:05 Bark like a dog You're not being the ball Danny - Caddyshack 00:31 You're not being the ball Danny He called me a baboon - Caddyshack 00:13 He called me a baboon Where did you come from - Caddyshack 00:08 Where did you come from Why don't you drop by sometime - Caddyshack 00:21 Why don't you drop by sometime Did somebody step on a duck - Caddyshack 00:04 Did somebody step on a duck ' where's your hat - Caddyshack 00:23 ' where's your hat

Cast

Ty Webb - Chevy Chase
Al Czervik - Rodney Dangerfield
Judge Elihu Smails - Ted Knight
Danny Noonan - Michael O'Keefe
Carl Spackler - Bill Murray