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"Casino Royale" quotes

Casino Royale poster
In an early spy spoof, aging Sir James Bond comes out of retirement to take on SMERSH.

Director: Val Guest, Ken Hughes, John Huston
Writer: Wolf Mankowitz, John Law, Michael Sayers
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy
Year: 1967
MetaScore: 48/100
ImdbRating: 5.0
BoxOffice: N/A
Released: 28 Apr 1967
Awards: Nominated for 1 Oscar. 4 nominations total
Do you know me from somewhere Your book Tremble On Baccarat - Casino Royale 00:15 Do you know me from somewhere Your book Tremble On Baccarat It's uncanny Quite uncanny - Casino Royale 00:35 It's uncanny Quite uncanny I went through a lot of trouble to bring you here - Casino Royale 00:11 I went through a lot of trouble to bring you here Why thank you Monsieur Could we have the name please - Casino Royale 00:33 Why thank you Monsieur Could we have the name please It really is I think I better freshen up a bit quick - Casino Royale 00:17 It really is I think I better freshen up a bit quick Tell me about yourself James - Casino Royale 00:22 Tell me about yourself James What can I do for you - Casino Royale 00:14 What can I do for you You must forgive me I lose control of myself - Casino Royale 00:17 You must forgive me I lose control of myself The things I didn't understand too well in your book - Casino Royale 00:28 The things I didn't understand too well in your book Why don't you come down to me - Casino Royale 00:13 Why don't you come down to me I haven't got time for that now Will you be needing me tonight sir - Casino Royale 00:08 I haven't got time for that now Will you be needing me... What form are you in - Casino Royale 00:21 What form are you in I'm testing the temperature of the water as I always did for my daddy - Casino Royale 00:56 I'm testing the temperature of the water as I always... Proceed with Smersh Plan B - Casino Royale 00:14 Proceed with Smersh Plan B This'll show Sir James once and for all which of us has the perfect body - Casino Royale 00:11 This'll show Sir James once and for all which of us has... So that's your plan - Casino Royale 00:14 So that's your plan I'm Miss Goodthighs - Casino Royale 00:17 I'm Miss Goodthighs So nice of you to come My pleasure - Casino Royale 00:11 So nice of you to come My pleasure Well that's all right then Would you say good bye to Dad for me - Casino Royale 00:11 Well that's all right then Would you say good bye to... They seem to treat you like some kind of a goddess - Casino Royale 00:30 They seem to treat you like some kind of a goddess This is where you come in Moneypenny - Casino Royale 00:12 This is where you come in Moneypenny So long suckers - Casino Royale 00:06 So long suckers Taxi Over here - Casino Royale 00:05 Taxi Over here To your right Sir James Lady Mary - Casino Royale 00:47 To your right Sir James Lady Mary I'm Heather I'm Meg - Casino Royale 00:20 I'm Heather I'm Meg What's the strategy sir - Casino Royale 00:07 What's the strategy sir Of course Some tea - Casino Royale 00:06 Of course Some tea Never trust a rich spy - Casino Royale 00:04 Never trust a rich spy It looks as though luck isn't on your side of the road tonight old man - Casino Royale 00:08 It looks as though luck isn't on your side of the road... James I need you Yes - Casino Royale 00:13 James I need you Yes Tell me Miss Goodthighs - Casino Royale 00:18 Tell me Miss Goodthighs You want me to be a spy like Mom - Casino Royale 00:26 You want me to be a spy like Mom I do so like to feel comfortable whatever I'm doing - Casino Royale 00:33 I do so like to feel comfortable whatever I'm doing Doesn't that do something to you 007 - Casino Royale 00:16 Doesn't that do something to you 007 I must say this place brings back a few memories - Casino Royale 00:20 I must say this place brings back a few memories My dear - Casino Royale 00:33 My dear It's getting gae cold - Casino Royale 00:11 It's getting gae cold Are there any men in the house Nane but the pipers - Casino Royale 00:21 Are there any men in the house Nane but the pipers For you Think of it madam - Casino Royale 00:31 For you Think of it madam All this trouble just to make up for your feeling of sexual inferiority - Casino Royale 00:20 All this trouble just to make up for your feeling of sexual... I see everything that goes on at this table - Casino Royale 00:36 I see everything that goes on at this table No one can be such a perverse idiot as to assault a customs official - Casino Royale 00:09 No one can be such a perverse idiot as to assault a customs... Sleep I've had nane for thinking on my dearie - Casino Royale 00:51 Sleep I've had nane for thinking on my dearie And what is your name Cooper big eyes but don't be formal - Casino Royale 00:10 And what is your name Cooper big eyes but don't be... Naught else remains Nothing to speak of I'm afraid - Casino Royale 00:35 Naught else remains Nothing to speak of I'm afraid Hadley we're up against an opposition of fiendish ingenuity - Casino Royale 00:25 Hadley we're up against an opposition of fiendish... Good lord Moneypenny - Casino Royale 00:39 Good lord Moneypenny But why Why at the height of his powers did Bond decide to retire - Casino Royale 00:30 But why Why at the height of his powers did Bond decide to... Look at this masterpiece gentlemen Surely we can do better than that - Casino Royale 00:07 Look at this masterpiece gentlemen Surely we can do better... Don't worry about that chair with the hole in the middle - Casino Royale 00:07 Don't worry about that chair with the hole in the... No not anymore He's mine Haven't you read the papers today - Casino Royale 00:20 No not anymore He's mine Haven't you read the... Do you treat all the girls you desire this way - Casino Royale 00:13 Do you treat all the girls you desire this way You're so like your mother you're driving me mad - Casino Royale 00:23 You're so like your mother you're driving me mad My battery needs recharging - Casino Royale 00:09 My battery needs recharging Who are you What you do want - Casino Royale 00:24 Who are you What you do want It's the first john I've ever gone round with - Casino Royale 00:05 It's the first john I've ever gone round with You mean there are only Be careful of my loose kneecap - Casino Royale 00:08 You mean there are only Be careful of my loose kneecap I never should've have let Nellie send him to progressive school - Casino Royale 00:05 I never should've have let Nellie send him to... Which side do you dress sir - Casino Royale 00:11 Which side do you dress sir I'll be back in five minutes If I'm not start without me - Casino Royale 00:07 I'll be back in five minutes If I'm not start... Goes against my nature you know I sensed that - Casino Royale 00:11 Goes against my nature you know I sensed that Grand Prix enthusiasts may be worried by the amount of time - Casino Royale 00:27 Grand Prix enthusiasts may be worried by the amount of time My love - Casino Royale 00:19 My love It's vaporized lysergic acid It's highly explosive - Casino Royale 00:09 It's vaporized lysergic acid It's highly explosive The Mata Hari School of Dancing - Casino Royale 00:24 The Mata Hari School of Dancing You know if you weren't my dad - Casino Royale 00:36 You know if you weren't my dad Handle these capsules with care - Casino Royale 00:17 Handle these capsules with care Don't be afraid It's a one way mirror - Casino Royale 00:08 Don't be afraid It's a one way mirror My dear Miss Lynd - Casino Royale 00:27 My dear Miss Lynd The auction is about to begin - Casino Royale 00:31 The auction is about to begin What's the strategy sir - Casino Royale 00:07 What's the strategy sir Gentlemen I am here tonight - Casino Royale 00:42 Gentlemen I am here tonight Bond James Bond - Casino Royale 00:17 Bond James Bond All remaining agents and trainees will be known as James Bond 007 including girls - Casino Royale 00:27 All remaining agents and trainees will be known as James... Thank you What a charming outfit that is - Casino Royale 00:12 Thank you What a charming outfit that is Listen you can't shoot me I have a very low threshold of death - Casino Royale 00:10 Listen you can't shoot me I have a very low threshold... They're the high priests of the temple Okay up it - Casino Royale 00:31 They're the high priests of the temple Okay up it Excuse me Willingly - Casino Royale 00:12 Excuse me Willingly Yes Lf you'll be good enough to sign here sir - Casino Royale 00:19 Yes Lf you'll be good enough to sign here sir

Cast

Evelyn Tremble (James Bond - 007) - Peter Sellers
Vesper Lynd (007) - Ursula Andress
Sir James Bond - David Niven
Le Chiffre - Orson Welles
Mata Bond - Joanna Pettet