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Clerks III

Oh, would you Shut the fuck up! That's not the line, man. What are you doing? My whole...

Dante: Oh, would you Shut the fuck up!
Randal: That's not the line, man. What are you doing?
Dante: My whole life, you've been running your mouth a million miles an hour and saying absolutely nothing! I gotta listen to you talk shit about everybody and everything, you'd think as if the world's waiting for you to weigh in! Nobody fucking cares!
Randal: Oh, real nice, pal! Get me all worked up cuz it's not like I had a heart attack and almost...
Dante: Died! I almost died! From a heart attack! Did I not mention that a couple thousand times yet?
Randal: Fuck you!
Dante: Hey everybody, look at me! I'm the boy who lived! So I gotta make a movie all about what a relentless fucking asshole I am to everybody I ever met, especially my so-called fucking friends!
Randal: Oh, we're not friends anymore, man. You can fucking believe that shit.
Dante: Good! Cuz if we're not friends, I don't have to worry anymore what the cold hard truth might do to your poor wittle heart!
Randal: Don't worry about me, pal. I'll be just fine.
Dante: So can I can be completely honest with you?
Randal: Oh please. Be completely honest.
Dante: You think you deserve a movie?
Randal: Yeah.
Dante: What did you ever do in life but watch it? And mock it?
Randal: What have YOU ever fucking done?
Dante: *I* had a life. I was this close to happily ever after and then... one drunk driver later... my movie's over. Forever. No happy ending! No sequel! Not even a third fucking act! Just fuck you and, oh, by the way, fuck you! Credits. Ah, but hey, what's that compared to a heart attack? I mean, shit! You could've almost died, right?
Randal: Yeah.
Dante: Well, some of us did die. Some of us have been dead inside ever since. And then, just when I'm able to walk into this place without wanting to kill myself every day, you have an idea. You want to make a movie about *your* life. Oh, and you've been very clear about that. It's *your* life! Well, get this, you self-centered, gapping wound of a human being, with your insatiable fucking ego!
Randal: The fuck!
Dante: *Your* life is my life! I've been there with you, the whole time! And since you know how hard my life's been on me, did it ever occur to you that maybe I didn't want to relive that fucking life? So I quit. As your producer. And I quit... As your fucking friend. Cuz I'm not even supposed to

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.201
Oh good Yeah
00:00:02.301 --> 00:00:04.236
Because if we're not friends
00:00:04.336 --> 00:00:07.039
I don't have to worry anymore what the cold hard truth
00:00:07.139 --> 00:00:09.108
might do to your poor wittle heart
00:00:09.208 --> 00:00:11.844
Oh don't worry about me pal I'll be just fine
00:00:11.944 --> 00:00:13.112
So since I can be completely
00:00:13.212 --> 00:00:14.613
honest with you Oh please
00:00:14.713 --> 00:00:16.382
be completely honest
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You think you deserve a movie
00:00:21.186 --> 00:00:22.488
Yeah
00:00:22.588 --> 00:00:26.999
What did you ever do in life but watch it
00:00:26.125 --> 00:00:27.076
and mock it
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What have you ever fucking done
00:00:30.362 --> 00:00:31.093
I had a life
00:00:33.499 --> 00:00:35.901
I was this close to happily ever after
00:00:36.767 --> 00:00:39.571
and then one drunk driver later
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My movie's over
00:00:43.175 --> 00:00:44.243
Forever
00:00:45.811 --> 00:00:47.479
No happy ending
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no sequel
00:00:49.481 --> 00:00:51.517
Not even a third fucking act
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just fuck you And oh by the way
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fuck you Credits
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But hey
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What's that compared to a heart attack
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I mean shit
00:01:07.996 --> 00:01:09.468
You could have almost died right
00:01:09.568 --> 00:01:10.001
Yeah
00:01:11.001 --> 00:01:13.955
Well some of us did die
00:01:15.541 --> 00:01:18.577
Some of us have been dead inside ever since
00:01:18.001 --> 00:01:22.214
But then just when I'm able to walk into this place
00:01:22.999 --> 00:01:26.452
without wanting to kill myself every day you have an idea
00:01:27.586 --> 00:01:29.001
You wanna make a movie about your life
00:01:29.655 --> 00:01:32.999
Oh and you You've been very clear about that
00:01:33.559 --> 00:01:34.999
It's your life
00:01:36.462 --> 00:01:39.732
Well get this you self centered
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gaping wound of a human being
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with your insatiable fucking ego
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The fuck
00:01:45.571 --> 00:01:46.905
Your life
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Is my life
00:01:50.777 --> 00:01:54.999
I've been there with you the whole time
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And since you know how hard that life's been on me
00:02:00.854 --> 00:02:03.322
did it ever occur to you
00:02:03.422 --> 00:02:07.997
that maybe I didn't wanna relive that fucking life
00:02:09.001 --> 00:02:10.999
So I quit
00:02:11.999 --> 00:02:13.999
As your producer
00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:16.535
And I quit
00:02:17.097 --> 00:02:20.003
As your fucking friend
00:02:23.999 --> 00:02:26.996
'Cause I'm not even supposed to
Duration
0 seconds
Views
229
Timestamp in Movie
00:00:00
Uploaded
Apr 30, 2024
Genres
Production
View Askew Productions,BondIt Media Capital,Lionsgate,TPC

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Movie Summary

Dante, Elias, and Jay and Silent Bob are enlisted by Randal after a heart attack to make a movie about the convenience store that started it all.