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So if I'm not Luke, Han, Chewie, Lando
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Clerks III

So if I'm not Luke, Han, Chewie, Lando, the droids or the Lobot, then who the fuckam I in...

So if I'm not Luke, Han, Chewie, Lando, the droids or the Lobot, then who the fuck
am I in your Star Wars? - Princess fucking Leia?
- No, you're the Dak

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.708
So if I'm not Luke, Han, Chewie, Lando,
00:00:04.795 --> 00:00:08.208
the droids or the Lobot, then who the fuck am I in your Star Wars?
00:00:08.299 --> 00:00:11.542
- Princess fucking Leia? - No, you're the Dak.
Duration
12 seconds
Views
46
Timestamp in Movie
00:34:52
Uploaded
May 03, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
View Askew Productions,BondIt Media Capital,Lionsgate,TPC

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Movie Summary

Dante, Elias, and Jay and Silent Bob are enlisted by Randal after a heart attack to make a movie about the convenience store that started it all.
You know, the guy who's ready to take on the whole Empire himself - Clerks III 00:06
You know, the guy who's ready to take on the whole Empi...
I mean, Dak was plucky as shit, man, just like you. - Clerks III 00:04
I mean, Dak was plucky as shit, man, just like you.
Yes, I have a problem with the Friar Fuck character, - Clerks III 00:06
Yes, I have a problem with the Friar Fuck character,
Friar Fuck, uh, loves Jesus... - Clerks III 00:04
Friar Fuck, uh, loves Jesus...
Because it was Satan who saved you - Clerks III 00:09
Because it was Satan who saved you
I get that you just broke up with your boyfriend Jesus recently, - Clerks III 00:08
I get that you just broke up with your boyfriend Jesus recen...
But for the first 36 years of your life, - Clerks III 00:09
But for the first 36 years of your life,
Just build us a schedule, keep us under budget, - Clerks III 00:08
Just build us a schedule, keep us under budget,
Well, technically, it's $27,575, - Clerks III 00:06
Well, technically, it's $27,575,
So the Crimson Crypto Club could have a lot of money to invest - Clerks III 00:05
So the Crimson Crypto Club could have a lot of money to inve...
We need real loot to make a real movie, - Clerks III 00:07
We need real loot to make a real movie,
[scoffing] - Clerks III 00:09
[scoffing]
Slow down? I almost died, man. It doesn't get any slower than that. - Clerks III 00:05
Slow down? I almost died, man. It doesn't get any slowe...
You're the guy who can never decide whether to shit or get off the pot. - Clerks III 00:04
You're the guy who can never decide whether to shit or ...
For now on, I'm gonna shit bricks, or what's the point of being here? - Clerks III 00:05
For now on, I'm gonna shit bricks, or what's the p...
So come on, man, get behind me when I shit for once. - Clerks III 00:05
So come on, man, get behind me when I shit for once.
[scoffs] - Clerks III 00:07
[scoffs]
[Becky] Well, well, well, here he is, - Clerks III 00:06
[Becky] Well, well, well, here he is,
I Sit on Your Grave. - Clerks III 00:06
I Sit on Your Grave.
I Spit on Your Grave. - Clerks III 00:07
I Spit on Your Grave.