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I mean, if I -- if I end up settling
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Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis

I mean, if I --if I end up settling for three Academy Award nodsand the -- the respect of...

I mean, if I --
if I end up settling for three Academy Award nods
and the -- the respect of audiences
and critics and my peers globally,
I'll -- I'll -- I'll find a way
to be happy about it

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.104
I mean, if I -- if I end up settling
00:00:04.104 --> 00:00:06.038
for three Academy Award nods and the --
00:00:06.038 --> 00:00:07.862
the respect of audiences and critics
00:00:07.862 --> 00:00:11.000
and my peers globally, I'll -- I'll --
00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:12.345
I'll find a way to be happy about it.
Duration
12 seconds
Views
35
Timestamp in Movie
00:35:38
Uploaded
Jun 26, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Comedy Central

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Movie Summary

Traditional comedy 'roast' where celebrities, comics and friends poke fun at actor Bruce Willis.
But the cold truth of it -- - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:12
But the cold truth of it --
[ Laughter ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:13
[ Laughter ]
It's not that I'm jealous, but, Jesus, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
It's not that I'm jealous, but, Jesus,
I mean, can I cock my eye and say some cryptic shit - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:10
I mean, can I cock my eye and say some cryptic shit
I was sitting in a bar with Bruce - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:17
I was sitting in a bar with Bruce
I had no idea why. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
I had no idea why.
I still don't know what he thought of the script, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
I still don't know what he thought of the script,
Can I -- Can I say things like, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:26
Can I -- Can I say things like,
I most definitely cannot. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
I most definitely cannot.
I wish I was Teflon like you, but, then again, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:07
I wish I was Teflon like you, but, then again,
[ Laughter ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:27
[ Laughter ]
No, I act my fucking ass off. Quentin never calls me. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
No, I act my fucking ass off. Quentin never calls me.
You know what I wouldn't give for the opportunity - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:08
You know what I wouldn't give for the opportunity
By the way -- By the way, when Wes Anderson calls him -- - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:07
By the way -- By the way, when Wes Anderson calls him --
Everyone in the cast stayed in a little house together. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
Everyone in the cast stayed in a little house together.
We did our own hair, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:08
We did our own hair,
[ Laughter ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
[ Laughter ]
When Wes said, "Do you think Bruce understands - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:08
When Wes said, "Do you think Bruce understands
That's a fuckin' movie star." - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
That's a fuckin' movie star."
I got acclaim, but I -- - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:10
I got acclaim, but I --