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I was sitting in a bar with Bruce
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Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis

I was sitting in a barwith Bruce and I asked him if he likedthe script I'd sent him, and...

I was sitting in a bar
with Bruce and I asked him if he liked
the script I'd sent him, and he says, "Try keeping
a marriage together when 22 is still on the menu." [ Laughter ] What the fuck does that mean?

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.138
I was sitting in a bar with Bruce
00:00:03.138 --> 00:00:04.965
and I asked him if he liked the script I'd sent him,
00:00:04.965 --> 00:00:07.413
and he says, "Try keeping a marriage together
00:00:07.413 --> 00:00:09.689
when 22 is still on the menu."
00:00:09.689 --> 00:00:12.001
[ Laughter ]
00:00:13.896 --> 00:00:17.031
What the fuck does that mean?
Duration
17 seconds
Views
44
Timestamp in Movie
00:36:32
Uploaded
Jun 26, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Comedy Central

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Movie Summary

Traditional comedy 'roast' where celebrities, comics and friends poke fun at actor Bruce Willis.
I had no idea why. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
I had no idea why.
I still don't know what he thought of the script, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
I still don't know what he thought of the script,
Can I -- Can I say things like, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:26
Can I -- Can I say things like,
I most definitely cannot. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
I most definitely cannot.
I wish I was Teflon like you, but, then again, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:07
I wish I was Teflon like you, but, then again,
[ Laughter ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:27
[ Laughter ]
No, I act my fucking ass off. Quentin never calls me. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
No, I act my fucking ass off. Quentin never calls me.
You know what I wouldn't give for the opportunity - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:08
You know what I wouldn't give for the opportunity
By the way -- By the way, when Wes Anderson calls him -- - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:07
By the way -- By the way, when Wes Anderson calls him --
Everyone in the cast stayed in a little house together. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
Everyone in the cast stayed in a little house together.
We did our own hair, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:08
We did our own hair,
[ Laughter ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
[ Laughter ]
When Wes said, "Do you think Bruce understands - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:08
When Wes said, "Do you think Bruce understands
That's a fuckin' movie star." - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
That's a fuckin' movie star."
I got acclaim, but I -- - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:10
I got acclaim, but I --
I'm not making any more movies unless they go straight to DVD." - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:10
I'm not making any more movies unless they go straight ...
No way. If I pulled that, my ass would be out in the cold, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:17
No way. If I pulled that, my ass would be out in the cold,
Was it your training? No. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
Was it your training? No.
You didn't go to candy-ass acting class for training. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
You didn't go to candy-ass acting class for training.
You did mounds of cocaine and tended bar - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
You did mounds of cocaine and tended bar