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[ Laughter ]
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Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis

We want you to havea good time tonight, but don't get too comfortableup here, because...

[ Laughter ] We want you to have
a good time tonight, but don't get too comfortable
up here, because later,
we're gonna be replacing you with Ashton Kutcher

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.034
[ Laughter ]
00:00:03.034 --> 00:00:04.276
We want you to have a good time tonight,
00:00:04.276 --> 00:00:06.345
but don't get too comfortable up here,
00:00:06.345 --> 00:00:08.517
because later, we're gonna be replacing you
00:00:08.517 --> 00:00:10.517
with Ashton Kutcher.
Duration
11 seconds
Views
53
Timestamp in Movie
00:10:03
Uploaded
Jun 26, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Comedy Central

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Movie Summary

Traditional comedy 'roast' where celebrities, comics and friends poke fun at actor Bruce Willis.
We want you to have a good time tonight - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:20
We want you to have a good time tonight
His gift was a toaster and $90 million. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
His gift was a toaster and $90 million.
[ Laughter ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:08
[ Laughter ]
Deep down, every single one of us - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:13
Deep down, every single one of us
Really. You give us what we want, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
Really. You give us what we want,
And so, tonight, let's honor - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:07
And so, tonight, let's honor
[ Laughter ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:16
[ Laughter ]
[ Cheers and applause ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
[ Cheers and applause ]
...Edward Norton, Martha Stewart, Dom Irrera, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:11
...Edward Norton, Martha Stewart, Dom Irrera,
[ Cheers and applause ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:11
[ Cheers and applause ]
When she's not hosting her hit radio show, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:08
When she's not hosting her hit radio show,
[ Cheers and applause ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:10
[ Cheers and applause ]
Joseph Gordon Levitt everyone - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:14
Joseph Gordon Levitt everyone
[ Cheers and applause ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
[ Cheers and applause ]
I bet you eat pussy but only with the crust cut off first. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
I bet you eat pussy but only with the crust cut off first.
[ Laughter ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
[ Laughter ]
Martha Stewart, "shank" you for being here. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
Martha Stewart, "shank" you for being here.
Seriously, and congratulations - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
Seriously, and congratulations
And into your sweatshops. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
And into your sweatshops.
Surprisingly, Martha said that prison food wasn't that bad. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
Surprisingly, Martha said that prison food wasn't that ...