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No matter how good I am, no matter how committed
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Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis

No matter how good I am,no matter how committed, no matter how professional, all those...

No matter how good I am,
no matter how committed, no matter how professional, all those things take me further
from your standard of stardom

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.931
No matter how good I am, no matter how committed,
00:00:02.931 --> 00:00:04.517
no matter how professional,
00:00:04.517 --> 00:00:08.031
all those things take me further from your standard of stardom.
Duration
8 seconds
Views
31
Timestamp in Movie
00:43:16
Uploaded
Jun 26, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Comedy Central

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Movie Summary

Traditional comedy 'roast' where celebrities, comics and friends poke fun at actor Bruce Willis.
There is nobody else like you, damn it. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:05
There is nobody else like you, damn it.
Nobody. Um, joking aside... - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
Nobody. Um, joking aside...
I was doing a play many years ago in New York, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
I was doing a play many years ago in New York,
And there was a letter in my apartment building - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
And there was a letter in my apartment building
And I read it, and it was one of the most thoughtful, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:07
And I read it, and it was one of the most thoughtful,
And it was signed "Bruce Willis." - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:09
And it was signed "Bruce Willis."
I said, "Did you really write me this letter?" - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:23
I said, "Did you really write me this letter?"
And many years later, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:10
And many years later,
And he said, "I told ya, if you ever need me, I'm in." - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:09
And he said, "I told ya, if you ever need me, I'm ...
Uh, and I'm really deeply grateful for that. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
Uh, and I'm really deeply grateful for that.
[ Laughter, cheers and applause ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
[ Laughter, cheers and applause ]
You wouldn't know the difference, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
You wouldn't know the difference,
[ Cheers and applause ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
[ Cheers and applause ]
...and Dom Irrera, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:06
...and Dom Irrera,
Sorry, I just have to say, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:07
Sorry, I just have to say,
[ Cheers and applause ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:11
[ Cheers and applause ]
[ Laughter ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:07
[ Laughter ]
But her rap sheet has an 800-thread count. - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:04
But her rap sheet has an 800-thread count.
[ Cheers and applause ] - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:15
[ Cheers and applause ]
I know something about hosting parties, - Comedy Central Roast of Bruce Willis 00:08
I know something about hosting parties,