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Count Abdulla

Sitcom following a British Pakistani Muslim junior doctor based in London who is bitten by a halal-hunting vampire.

Director

N/A

Year

Genre

comedy, fantasy, horror

Production

Fudge Park Productions

Awards

N/A

Homepage

https://www.itv.com/watch/count-abdulla/10a3156

Abdulla

Kathy

Bushra

Amrita

Manpreet Bambra

Shafi

Nahima

Maajid

Frank

Charles

Ruby

Yazan

Chris

Rishi

Surgeon

Shakeel

Rashid

Bhupinder

Uncle Jabbar

Preethi

Fraser

Simran

Maitre D'

Jaswinder

Air Hostess

Auntie Gurinder

Marcus

Airport Passerby

Omar Alboukharey

Coven Vampire

Coven Vampire

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Explore 518 Clips

Shafi here was just telling me
about your new fiancee. - Count Abdulla

Shafi here was just telling me about your new fiancee.

I... bit him. - Count Abdulla

Did he taste good?
SHE CHUCKLES - Count Abdulla

Did he taste good? SHE CHUCKLES

They'll look right through
those cute brown-boy looks of yours, - Count Abdulla

They'll look right through those cute brown-boy looks o...

You can't marry a non-Muslim, bruv.
So it's Khadija, or no nikah... - Count Abdulla

You can't marry a non-Muslim, bruv. So it's Khadij...

Maj is in hospital, - Count Abdulla

Maj is in hospital,

You don't know what I've become, - Count Abdulla

You don't know what I've become,

Well, between the shock of hearing
how my son is engaged - Count Abdulla

Well, between the shock of hearing how my son is engaged

No, just some patient
with Real Housewife delusions - Count Abdulla

No, just some patient with Real Housewife delusions

So you're not gonna tell me - Count Abdulla

So you're not gonna tell me

Or maybe it's the more
obvious answer. - Count Abdulla

Or maybe it's the more obvious answer.

Bullshit. All this medical shit
has taken you away from God's truth. - Count Abdulla

Bullshit. All this medical shit has taken you away from God&...

SHE GROANS - Count Abdulla

You need to decide whether
you're on the side of the NHS, - Count Abdulla

You need to decide whether you're on the side of the NH...

'Have you forgotten
what day it is today?' - Count Abdulla

'Have you forgotten what day it is today?'

I'd have thought
the men you've a taste for - Count Abdulla

I'd have thought the men you've a taste for

YOU need to decide
whether you're on the side of... - Count Abdulla

YOU need to decide whether you're on the side of...

Cos most of these old school imams, - Count Abdulla

Cos most of these old school imams,

I love you so much, I really do,
but I really have to go, OK? - Count Abdulla

I love you so much, I really do, but I really have to go, OK...

Adidas or Allah, bro. - Count Abdulla

Adidas or Allah, bro.

'If you hadn't just finished
medical school, - Count Abdulla

'If you hadn't just finished medical school,

Something you wouldn't know about, - Count Abdulla

Something you wouldn't know about,

WOMAN CHUCKLES - Count Abdulla

You know the penalty
for breaking the One Progeny policy? - Count Abdulla

You know the penalty for breaking the One Progeny policy?

That is why I've been acting
a little differently recently. - Count Abdulla

That is why I've been acting a little differently recen...

T-T-Tomorrow.
SHE GASPS - Count Abdulla

T-T-Tomorrow. SHE GASPS

'Bout Adidas.
SUCKS AIR THROUGH HIS TEETH - Count Abdulla

'Bout Adidas. SUCKS AIR THROUGH HIS TEETH

'I mean, you can't leave your mum
alone on Eid, of all days!' - Count Abdulla

'I mean, you can't leave your mum alone on Eid, of...

Sundown tomorrow...
or it's the stake for you, too. - Count Abdulla

Sundown tomorrow... or it's the stake for you, too.

MAN SCREAMS
'What was that noise?' - Count Abdulla

MAN SCREAMS 'What was that noise?'

COIN CLINKS
Don't spend it all on drugs. - Count Abdulla

COIN CLINKS Don't spend it all on drugs.

Abdulla, I am happy to give you
the space that you need, - Count Abdulla

Abdulla, I am happy to give you the space that you need,

Well, Frank wanted
to invite you over, - Count Abdulla

Well, Frank wanted to invite you over,

HE GROANS - Count Abdulla

Abdulla sucked on your fiance's neck
like it was a Capri Sun. - Count Abdulla

Abdulla sucked on your fiance's neck like it was a Capr...

I think this'll be a good thing
for you and... Kathy. - Count Abdulla

I think this'll be a good thing for you and... Kathy.

SLURPS AND LAUGHS - Count Abdulla

SLURPS AND LAUGHS

MAN GROANS - Count Abdulla

You pushed Abdulla
into living life by your rules - Count Abdulla

You pushed Abdulla into living life by your rules

Yes, she's real! I'll bring her, OK? - Count Abdulla

Yes, she's real! I'll bring her, OK?

Er... Erm, tell Frank
not to use any garlic. - Count Abdulla

Er... Erm, tell Frank not to use any garlic.

Go on, big man ting, tell her.
Abdulla is a... - Count Abdulla

Go on, big man ting, tell her. Abdulla is a...

HE SIGHS - Count Abdulla

Vampire.
MEN SQUEAL - Count Abdulla

Vampire. MEN SQUEAL

Is there...
something you wanna tell me? - Count Abdulla

Is there... something you wanna tell me?

"Humping their way over dunes
and..." - Count Abdulla

"Humping their way over dunes and..."

I know, Abdulla.
I know, it's just... - Count Abdulla

I know, Abdulla. I know, it's just...

SHE GROANS,
HE CHUCKLES - Count Abdulla

SHE GROANS, HE CHUCKLES

SHE SIGHS - Count Abdulla

Oh, no. Oh!
Stop it. - Count Abdulla

Oh, no. Oh! Stop it.

That's rather curious,
as you're certainly not a vampire. - Count Abdulla

That's rather curious, as you're certainly not a v...

SHE EXHALES - Count Abdulla

A single bite
only has a small chance - Count Abdulla

A single bite only has a small chance

I know about the Mehndi night
and the Haldi ceremony, - Count Abdulla

I know about the Mehndi night and the Haldi ceremony,

Well, for the same reason
Black characters in horror movies - Count Abdulla

Well, for the same reason Black characters in horror movies

This is a Hamsa, the Hand of Fatima. - Count Abdulla

This is a Hamsa, the Hand of Fatima.

Come on,
I know that was brown-girl talk - Count Abdulla

Come on, I know that was brown-girl talk

If immortal creatures of the night
were on our side, Abs, - Count Abdulla

If immortal creatures of the night were on our side, Abs,

Abhijeet, who's this?
Abhijeet? - Count Abdulla

Abhijeet, who's this? Abhijeet?

Nah, you know what,
if my stupid little cousin - Count Abdulla

Nah, you know what, if my stupid little cousin

I'm heading to Amrita's
for a dinner party. Mm. - Count Abdulla

I'm heading to Amrita's for a dinner party. Mm.

SMOKE FIZZES - Count Abdulla

Like the feminist icons
from the James Gordon classic, - Count Abdulla

Like the feminist icons from the James Gordon classic,

I'm Frank. Amrita's boyfriend?
What? - Count Abdulla

I'm Frank. Amrita's boyfriend? What?

What's THIS all about?
Oh, this? - Count Abdulla

What's THIS all about? Oh, this?

You know, Transylvanian count
wreaking havoc - Count Abdulla

You know, Transylvanian count wreaking havoc

I want you to hold onto it. For me. - Count Abdulla

I want you to hold onto it. For me.

Who literally became a vampire - Count Abdulla

Who literally became a vampire

And is that a decanter
of your finest mango Rubicon? - Count Abdulla

And is that a decanter of your finest mango Rubicon?

He'll be fine, as long as he stops
all that... licking. - Count Abdulla

He'll be fine, as long as he stops all that... licking.

I can't believe you came.
Why? What's wrong, babe? - Count Abdulla

I can't believe you came. Why? What's wrong, babe?

I'm not drunk, Mum.
I never drink... alcohol. - Count Abdulla

I'm not drunk, Mum. I never drink... alcohol.

Just setting the atmosphere
for a bit of self-love tonight. - Count Abdulla

Just setting the atmosphere for a bit of self-love tonight.

If we can get to the airport
before he does tomorrow, - Count Abdulla

If we can get to the airport before he does tomorrow,

FOOTSTEPS ASCEND STAIRS - Count Abdulla

FOOTSTEPS ASCEND STAIRS

It's Eid today.
It c-can't be Halloween. - Count Abdulla

It's Eid today. It c-can't be Halloween.

Number two,
can you stop throwing terms at me - Count Abdulla

Number two, can you stop throwing terms at me

KEYS JANGLE - Count Abdulla

Baby girl, I love you, - Count Abdulla

Baby girl, I love you,

I'm not like
those other white boys, ya? - Count Abdulla

I'm not like those other white boys, ya?

This must be what it feels like - Count Abdulla

This must be what it feels like

Baby, you cannot be a Muslim
and a vampire, OK? - Count Abdulla

Baby, you cannot be a Muslim and a vampire, OK?

Iqra, he seems to have got it
into his head that a Shisha bar - Count Abdulla

Iqra, he seems to have got it into his head that a Shisha ba...

AND... And he's calling himself
an Imam now, - Count Abdulla

AND... And he's calling himself an Imam now,

I... I...
SHE SIGHS - Count Abdulla

I... I... SHE SIGHS

There's nobody stopping
Shafi the vampire slayer. - Count Abdulla

There's nobody stopping Shafi the vampire slayer.

Er... Frank,
why don't we hang out today, - Count Abdulla

Er... Frank, why don't we hang out today,

No. Am... Amri... Amrita, I'm sorry. - Count Abdulla

No. Am... Amri... Amrita, I'm sorry.

Come on! My guy! What a dialogue.
Yeah, man. - Count Abdulla

Come on! My guy! What a dialogue. Yeah, man.

Muslim... a-phobe,
or whatever it is, OK? - Count Abdulla

Muslim... a-phobe, or whatever it is, OK?

Count Abdulla poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Sitcom following a British Pakistani Muslim junior doctor based in London who is bitten by a halal-hunting vampire.

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: N/A

Writer: Kaamil Shah

Production: Fudge Park Productions

Genre: comedy, fantasy, horror

Year: 2023

MetaScore: N/A/100

ImdbRating: 5.4

BoxOffice:

Released: 15 Jun 2023

Awards: N/A

Homepage: https://www.itv.com/watch/count-abdulla/10a3156