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I could be dead by Monday morning!
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Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy

I could be dead byMonday morning!" She said, "Well, you shouldhave washed your groceries,"...

I could be dead by
Monday morning!" She said, "Well, you should
have washed your groceries," and hung up

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.959
I could be dead by Monday morning!"
00:00:02.959 --> 00:00:04.308
She said, "Well, you should have washed your groceries,"
00:00:04.308 --> 00:00:05.222
and hung up.
Duration
6 seconds
Views
23
Timestamp in Movie
00:32:02
Uploaded
Apr 09, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Green Mountain West

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Movie Summary

Ferguson returns to the spotlight and despite life's setbacks - his recent bout with an unknown calcified infection that plagued his eyeball, a nasty UTI, long covid, his fear of millennials, and having to tiptoe his comedy around foreign accents and his wife - Craig Ferguson is still so happy.
So the whole weekend I was in this flat in Glasgow, - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:06
So the whole weekend I was in this flat in Glasgow,
I was like, "Oh my God." - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:11
I was like, "Oh my God."
I was like, "Quiet, Snorky. It's all right, boy." - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:09
I was like, "Quiet, Snorky. It's all right, boy.&q...
[all laughing] - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:11
[all laughing]
The fever wouldn't go away - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:08
The fever wouldn't go away
And it said a thing and I went, "Wow, - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:09
And it said a thing and I went, "Wow,
It went, "If I live through this, - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:16
It went, "If I live through this,
[audience laughing] - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:06
[audience laughing]
And it was a bit tricky - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:10
And it was a bit tricky
And she said, you know, "I talked to her about the Covid - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:09
And she said, you know, "I talked to her about the Covi...
And she said, "What is it?" - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:08
And she said, "What is it?"
She went, "Oh great." [audience laughing] - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:13
She went, "Oh great." [audience laughing]
10 points off Slytherin." - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:07
10 points off Slytherin."
She got a little tongue-depressor thing and she moved it. - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:05
She got a little tongue-depressor thing and she moved it.
She moved it and she went, - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:07
She moved it and she went,
I'll give you some antibiotics and it'll clear right up." - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:14
I'll give you some antibiotics and it'll clear rig...
It was like, "Yeah, we took some Patagonian acid, - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:06
It was like, "Yeah, we took some Patagonian acid,
Ah-ha-ha!" [audience laughing] - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:13
Ah-ha-ha!" [audience laughing]
Looked like a snail with leprosy." - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:12
Looked like a snail with leprosy."
[audience laughing] - Craig Ferguson: I'm So Happy 00:09
[audience laughing]