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Dave Chappelle: The Closer

I was ready and then right when you think we would fight,guess what he did?

I was ready and then right when you think we would fight,
guess what he did?

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.045
I was ready and then
00:00:04.128 --> 00:00:06.923
right when you think we would fight, guess what he did?
Duration
7 seconds
Views
43
Timestamp in Movie
00:18:53
Uploaded
May 20, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Stan Lathan TV

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Movie Summary

As he closes out his slate of comedy specials, Dave takes the stage to try and set the record straight; and get a few things off his chest.
He picked up his phone and he called the police. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
He picked up his phone and he called the police.
And this, this thing I am describing - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
And this, this thing I am describing
Gay people are minorities, until they need to be White again. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:06
Gay people are minorities, until they need to be White again...
[laughter] - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:11
[laughter]
I'm telling you right now - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
I'm telling you right now
'Cause a Black gay person knows, when the police shows up - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:06
'Cause a Black gay person knows, when the police shows ...
They don't show up like, "Which one of you niggers is Clifford?" - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:08
They don't show up like, "Which one of you niggers...
Another time, about six years ago, there was a lesbian woman - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:08
Another time, about six years ago, there was a lesbian woman
Thank goodness, TMZ could see right through the sham of that story. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
Thank goodness, TMZ could see right through the sham of that...
This woman claimed that I beat her up in a night club - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:08
This woman claimed that I beat her up in a night club
Thank God! TMZ didn't believe that - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
Thank God! TMZ didn't believe that
[audience laughs] - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
[audience laughs]
I came into the club minding my own business - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
I came into the club minding my own business
Benign talk, nothing to it. And all of a sudden - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:08
Benign talk, nothing to it. And all of a sudden
"Hey nigga, that's my girl!" - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
"Hey nigga, that's my girl!"
She said, "I ain't backing up off shit, nigga, that's my girl!" - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:18
She said, "I ain't backing up off shit, nigga, tha...
And I said, "Oh my God, you are a woman." - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:14
And I said, "Oh my God, you are a woman."
I said softly, sweetly, like a pimp might say. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:06
I said softly, sweetly, like a pimp might say.
[laughter] - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:09
[laughter]
She dropped that foot back, she was in a perfect southpaw stance. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
She dropped that foot back, she was in a perfect southpaw st...