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Dave Chappelle: The Closer

I'd be mad as shit if I was a woman.I'd be mad if I was me

[laughter] I'd be mad as shit if I was a woman.
I'd be mad if I was me

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.046
[laughter]
00:00:02.543 --> 00:00:05.546
I'd be mad as shit if I was a woman. I'd be mad if I was me.
Duration
6 seconds
Views
32
Timestamp in Movie
00:54:22
Uploaded
May 20, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Stan Lathan TV

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Movie Summary

As he closes out his slate of comedy specials, Dave takes the stage to try and set the record straight; and get a few things off his chest.
If I was in the BET awards, sitting there and they're like - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:09
If I was in the BET awards, sitting there and they're l...
Every human being in this room, every human being on Earth - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:08
Every human being in this room, every human being on Earth
That is a fact. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
That is a fact.
[laughter] - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
[laughter]
I am not saying that to say, that trans women aren't women. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
I am not saying that to say, that trans women aren't wo...
I'm just sayin, that those pussies that they got... - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
I'm just sayin, that those pussies that they got...
I'm not saying it is not pussy, but that's like - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
I'm not saying it is not pussy, but that's like
It tastes like pussy but that's not quite what it is, is it? - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
It tastes like pussy but that's not quite what it is, i...
Before I go, I want to share this story with you - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
Before I go, I want to share this story with you
I want your community to know that one of the coolest people I ever met - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:06
I want your community to know that one of the coolest people...
And this is not a man that I knew - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
And this is not a man that I knew
Lived in San Francisco, Daphne Dwarman is the name. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
Lived in San Francisco, Daphne Dwarman is the name.
I would do 18 shows in the Bay Area - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:12
I would do 18 shows in the Bay Area
And what it was, turns out - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
And what it was, turns out
I could not dislike somebody that felt that way about me. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
I could not dislike somebody that felt that way about me.
And when I made that special Sticks and Stones - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:08
And when I made that special Sticks and Stones
And I called her myself, - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:06
And I called her myself,
And I go, "I'm in San Francisco." - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:08
And I go, "I'm in San Francisco."
I'm just calling, because I'm doing a show and I need an opening act. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
I'm just calling, because I'm doing a show and I n...
And I was wondering if you'd open the show?" - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:12
And I was wondering if you'd open the show?"