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Thank God! TMZ didn't believe that
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Dave Chappelle: The Closer

Thank God! TMZ didn't believe that because I did beat the shit out of her,I am not gonna...

Thank God! TMZ didn't believe that because I did beat the shit out of her,
I am not gonna lie

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.294
Thank God! TMZ didn't believe that
00:00:04.754 --> 00:00:07.009
because I did beat the shit out of her, I am not gonna lie.
Duration
7 seconds
Views
49
Timestamp in Movie
00:20:15
Uploaded
May 20, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Stan Lathan TV

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Movie Summary

As he closes out his slate of comedy specials, Dave takes the stage to try and set the record straight; and get a few things off his chest.
[audience laughs] - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
[audience laughs]
I came into the club minding my own business - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
I came into the club minding my own business
Benign talk, nothing to it. And all of a sudden - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:08
Benign talk, nothing to it. And all of a sudden
"Hey nigga, that's my girl!" - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
"Hey nigga, that's my girl!"
She said, "I ain't backing up off shit, nigga, that's my girl!" - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:18
She said, "I ain't backing up off shit, nigga, tha...
And I said, "Oh my God, you are a woman." - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:14
And I said, "Oh my God, you are a woman."
I said softly, sweetly, like a pimp might say. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:06
I said softly, sweetly, like a pimp might say.
[laughter] - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:09
[laughter]
She dropped that foot back, she was in a perfect southpaw stance. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
She dropped that foot back, she was in a perfect southpaw st...
Her shoulders were angled correctly, - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
Her shoulders were angled correctly,
This bitch boxes for real." - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:09
This bitch boxes for real."
I had no choice, I had to go to work. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
I had no choice, I had to go to work.
I let that jab go, you should have seen me go nigga. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
I let that jab go, you should have seen me go nigga.
I tenderized them titties like chicken cutlets. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
I tenderized them titties like chicken cutlets.
I whooped the toxic masculinity out of that bitch. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
I whooped the toxic masculinity out of that bitch.
Just trying to chill, I'm just trying to live a peaceful life. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
Just trying to chill, I'm just trying to live a peacefu...
That's why I live in Ohio, you know, I live in a little town in Ohio. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
That's why I live in Ohio, you know, I live in a little...
Must be like 3700 people, small hippie town. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:04
Must be like 3700 people, small hippie town.
Culturally you might feel like, like Ann Arbor to you. - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:05
Culturally you might feel like, like Ann Arbor to you.
[laughter] - Dave Chappelle: The Closer 00:07
[laughter]