To watch in HD, get ClipCafe PRO
Because honestly, if I saw heroin
Please log in to add to collections.
David Spade: Nothing Personal

Because honestly, if I saw heroin, I'd really want to jump on a stooland go "Eek, a...

Because honestly, if I saw heroin, I'd really want to jump on a stool
and go "Eek, a mouse," you know, but… [crowd laughing] I, uh… Oh, I look good? Thank you

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.127
Because honestly, if I saw heroin,
00:00:03.021 --> 00:00:06.547
I'd really want to jump on a stool and go "Eek, a mouse," you know, but…
00:00:06.063 --> 00:00:07.506
[crowd laughing]
00:00:08.674 --> 00:00:10.001
I, uh…
00:00:10.926 --> 00:00:12.636
Oh, I look good? Thank you.
Duration
14 seconds
Views
24
Timestamp in Movie
00:25:25
Uploaded
Mar 29, 2025
Genres
documentary, comedy
Production
N/A

Want This Clip in HD?

Upgrade for HD/4K downloads and unlimited access. Upgrade now →

Movie Summary

Follows David Spade sharing his disdain for crabs and his unique approach to turning down drugs. Spade is going to prove that no topic is off limits.
-[girl whooping] -I… - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:07
-[girl whooping] -I…
And the subject of weight is funny, 'cause with guys… - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:09
And the subject of weight is funny, 'cause with guys…
And I remember I got weighed the last time when I was about, you know, 30. - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:06
And I remember I got weighed the last time when I was about,...
And then for the rest of my life - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:05
And then for the rest of my life
[crowd laughing] - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:11
[crowd laughing]
And it sort of backfired on me 'cause I was… - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:11
And it sort of backfired on me 'cause I was…
And when we were doing Grown Ups, I had to go in and get, uh, tested for it. - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:06
And when we were doing Grown Ups, I had to go in and get, uh...
And Grown Ups is a movie you've probably seen - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:08
And Grown Ups is a movie you've probably seen
[crowd laughing] - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:12
[crowd laughing]
So the doctor calls me and goes, "Hey, come in for a physical." - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:25
So the doctor calls me and goes, "Hey, come in for a ph...
[crowd laughing] - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:07
[crowd laughing]
"Oh, you don't have the chalupa today?" - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:15
"Oh, you don't have the chalupa today?"
But… - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:07
But…
He goes, "How much you weigh?" - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:25
He goes, "How much you weigh?"
So I go over to this old man doctor stick scale thing. - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:06
So I go over to this old man doctor stick scale thing.
Little black cinder blocks. I go, "These are 50 each, right?" - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:09
Little black cinder blocks. I go, "These are 50 each, r...
And then… [clacking] …the one-pounder, - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:06
And then… [clacking] …the one-pounder,
"I'm 145, 'cause I'm such a fat ox, according to you." - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:06
"I'm 145, 'cause I'm such a fat ox, acco...
"What is he talking about?" So I go like this… - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:09
"What is he talking about?" So I go like this…
[crowd laughing] - David Spade: Nothing Personal 00:09
[crowd laughing]