Deadpool quotes

Deadpool poster
This is the origin story of former Special Forces operative turned mercenary Wade Wilson, who after being subjected to a rogue experiment that leaves him with accelerated healing powers, adopts the alter ego Deadpool. Armed with his new abilities and a dark, twisted sense of humor, Deadpool hunts down the man who nearly destroyed his life.

Director: Tim Miller
Writer: Rhett Reese, Paul Wernick
Production: 20th Century Fox
Year: 2016
MetaScore: 65/100
ImdbRating: 8.0
BoxOffice: $328,674,489
Released: 12 Feb 2016
Awards: Nominated for 2 Golden Globes. Another 27 wins & 73 nominations.


117 Clips & Quotes

I give you - Deadpool 00:46 I give you But it rhymes with  Polverine - Deadpool 00:52 But it rhymes with Polverine I had another Liam Neeson nightmare - Deadpool 00:43 I had another Liam Neeson nightmare I get why you're so pissy - Deadpool 01:59 I get why you're so pissy Is that you - Deadpool 01:27 Is that you From Alien 3 - Deadpool 00:21 From Alien 3 McAvoy or Stewart - Deadpool 00:26 McAvoy or Stewart All dinosaurs feared the T Rex - Deadpool 00:13 All dinosaurs feared the T Rex You're probably thinking - Deadpool 01:27 You're probably thinking Time to make the chimi fuckin' changas - Deadpool 00:15 Time to make the chimi fuckin' changas You're about to be killed by a zamboni - Deadpool 00:32 You're about to be killed by a zamboni The day I decide to become a crime fighting shit swizzler - Deadpool 00:55 The day I decide to become a crime fighting shit swizzler You're a lovely lady - Deadpool 00:59 You're a lovely lady A fourth wall break inside a fourth wall break - Deadpool 00:22 A fourth wall break inside a fourth wall break Here's what I'm actually gonna do - Deadpool 01:45 Here's what I'm actually gonna do Do you like what you see - Deadpool 02:09 Do you like what you see Maximum effort - Deadpool 00:10 Maximum effort I'd go with you - Deadpool 00:13 I'd go with you But don't swallow - Deadpool 00:18 But don't swallow Check it out - Deadpool 00:51 Check it out Think of it like spring cleaning - Deadpool 01:15 Think of it like spring cleaning Bad Deadpool - Deadpool 00:12 Bad Deadpool Here's the thing - Deadpool 00:52 Here's the thing Finish fucking her the fuck up - Deadpool 00:16 Finish fucking her the fuck up You may be wondering - Deadpool 00:33 You may be wondering Rich Corinthian leather - Deadpool 00:12 Rich Corinthian leather I'm touching myself tonight - Deadpool 00:13 I'm touching myself tonight Can I come and visit you between the holidays - Deadpool 00:29 Can I come and visit you between the holidays Your poor wife - Deadpool 00:10 Your poor wife What if I told you we can cure your cancer - Deadpool 00:47 What if I told you we can cure your cancer Well I hate to break it to you - Deadpool 01:00 Well I hate to break it to you Have you decided what you're gonna say to her - Deadpool 00:21 Have you decided what you're gonna say to her Why the fancy red suit - Deadpool 00:51 Why the fancy red suit I should've come and found you sooner - Deadpool 00:58 I should've come and found you sooner Did I leave the stove on - Deadpool 00:12 Did I leave the stove on Go be a big brother to someone - Deadpool 00:22 Go be a big brother to someone If I never see you again - Deadpool 00:45 If I never see you again Why such a douche this morning - Deadpool 01:06 Why such a douche this morning Right up Main Street - Deadpool 00:11 Right up Main Street How can I help you - Deadpool 00:19 How can I help you I wouldn't do that if I were you - Deadpool 00:31 I wouldn't do that if I were you Happy Lent - Deadpool 00:12 Happy Lent I'm a teenage girl - Deadpool 00:54 I'm a teenage girl Vanessa's already working on plan's A - Deadpool 00:34 Vanessa's already working on plan's A Have you seen this man - Deadpool 00:12 Have you seen this man You've been warned before - Deadpool 00:41 You've been warned before How's the Kullen coming along - Deadpool 01:16 How's the Kullen coming along You can't buy love - Deadpool 00:18 You can't buy love Look away - Deadpool 00:12 Look away I bet it feels huge in this hand - Deadpool 00:14 I bet it feels huge in this hand We can't allow this - Deadpool 00:56 We can't allow this Are you there God - Deadpool 00:11 Are you there God Coming on to our stage right now - Deadpool 00:23 Coming on to our stage right now This my shit - Deadpool 00:47 This my shit There are no words - Deadpool 01:20 There are no words Cue the music - Deadpool 00:10 Cue the music Kinda lonesome back here - Deadpool 00:14 Kinda lonesome back here Captain Deadpool - Deadpool 00:36 Captain Deadpool Nice to see you - Deadpool 00:18 Nice to see you We both know that cancer is a shit show - Deadpool 01:45 We both know that cancer is a shit show You got something in your teeth - Deadpool 00:13 You got something in your teeth Do you have off switch - Deadpool 00:23 Do you have off switch We have everything we need now - Deadpool 00:33 We have everything we need now This is confusing - Deadpool 00:26 This is confusing What's my name - Deadpool 00:10 What's my name Wade Wilson - Deadpool 00:43 Wade Wilson Is Ajax your actual name - Deadpool 01:07 Is Ajax your actual name A heavily armed child - Deadpool 01:01 A heavily armed child Merchandise - Deadpool 02:25 Merchandise I presume a crisp high five - Deadpool 00:28 I presume a crisp high five I hear you grow back body parts now - Deadpool 00:39 I hear you grow back body parts now Douche Pool - Deadpool 00:25 Douche Pool I've been traveling to exotic places - Deadpool 00:52 I've been traveling to exotic places Jacksonville - Deadpool 00:42 Jacksonville There's the money shot - Deadpool 00:12 There's the money shot Nothing warms my heart more than a change of someone else's - Deadpool 00:49 Nothing warms my heart more than a change of someone else's Not out of the woods yet - Deadpool 01:07 Not out of the woods yet That's all right - Deadpool 01:05 That's all right He's tied up in the trunk - Deadpool 01:31 He's tied up in the trunk She's like Robin to my Batman - Deadpool 00:29 She's like Robin to my Batman Love is a beautiful thing - Deadpool 01:10 Love is a beautiful thing 'Cause she knows you - Deadpool 01:56 'Cause she knows you Which ones - Deadpool 00:17 Which ones Use seltzer water and lemon juice for blood - Deadpool 00:18 Use seltzer water and lemon juice for blood You ate breakfast - Deadpool 00:30 You ate breakfast I give a guy a pavement facial - Deadpool 00:35 I give a guy a pavement facial I never carry a wallet when I'm working - Deadpool 00:26 I never carry a wallet when I'm working Here we go - Deadpool 01:21 Here we go You're not clowning - Deadpool 00:17 You're not clowning You know the funniest part of this - Deadpool 01:38 You know the funniest part of this What if I just held on and never let go - Deadpool 00:36 What if I just held on and never let go I wish I'd never heard of Craigslist - Deadpool 00:44 I wish I'd never heard of Craigslist And maximum effort - Deadpool 00:24 And maximum effort I'm a bad guy who is paid to fuck up worse guys - Deadpool 00:17 I'm a bad guy who is paid to fuck up worse guys You're lovely - Deadpool 01:05 You're lovely Motherfucker - Deadpool 00:34 Motherfucker They pull down a gaggle of ass - Deadpool 00:59 They pull down a gaggle of ass Don't worry - Deadpool 00:27 Don't worry I'd hit that - Deadpool 00:41 I'd hit that Where's Francis - Deadpool 00:19 Where's Francis Did I say this was a love story - Deadpool 00:17 Did I say this was a love story I told you - Deadpool 00:53 I told you I miss cocaine - Deadpool 00:10 I miss cocaine My old boyfriend - Deadpool 00:53 My old boyfriend Apparently - Deadpool 00:31 Apparently It reeks like old lady pants in here - Deadpool 00:25 It reeks like old lady pants in here Who brought this twinkly man - Deadpool 00:47 Who brought this twinkly man Not often a dude ruins your face - Deadpool 00:48 Not often a dude ruins your face Go get her - Deadpool 00:09 Go get her You little spider monkey - Deadpool 00:12 You little spider monkey I was a patient here once myself - Deadpool 00:52 I was a patient here once myself Am I crazy - Deadpool 00:21 Am I crazy Ever hear of the one legged man in the ass kicking contest - Deadpool 00:19 Ever hear of the one legged man in the ass kicking contest Did you ever see 127 Hours - Deadpool 00:15 Did you ever see 127 Hours You're still here - Deadpool 01:02 You're still here Four or five moments - Deadpool 01:34 Four or five moments Ve been thinking - Deadpool 01:18 Ve been thinking

Cast

Dopinder - Karan Soni
Ajax - Ed Skrein
Warlord - Michael Benyaer
Colossus - Stefan Kapicic
Negasonic Teenage Warhead - Brianna Hildebrand
Jeremy (Pizza Guy) - Style Dayne
Gavin Merchant - Kyle Cassie
Meghan Orlovsky - Taylor Hickson
Teen Girl #1 - Ayzee
Teen Girl #2 - Naika Toussaint
Weasel - T.J. Miller
Vanessa - Morena Baccarin
Arcade Ticket Taker - Justyn Shippelt
Oncologist - Donna Yamamoto
Recruiter - Jed Rees
David Cunningham - Hugh Scott
Angel Dust - Gina Carano
Chinatown Merchant - Cindy Piper
Whisper Girlfriend - Emily Haine
Whisper Boyfriend - Aatash Amir
Pool Hall Goon - Chad Riley
Fight Club Boss - Paul Belsito
Garbage Truck Driver - Darcey Johnson
Blind Al - Leslie Uggams
Super Soldier #1 - Kyle Rideout
Super Soldier #2 (as Jason Day) - Jason William Day
Strip Club DJ - Stan Lee
No5 Orange Manager - Ben Wilkinson
Strip Club Worker (as Rachel Shaw) - Rachel Sheen
Flight Deck Guard - Paul Lazenby
Waitress Kelly - Kayla Adams
Hospital Doctor - Brad Archie
Bar Patron - Colleen Bradford
Stripclub Pole Performer - Heather Ashley Chase
Guadalajaran Nurse - Fabiola Colmenero
Stripper - Victoria De Mare
Thug #2 - John Dryden
Guy in Strip Club - Jesse Michael Fullington
Strip Club Spectator - David Hardware
Strip Club Patron - Matthew Hoglie
Fight Club Spectator - Tony Chris Kazoleas
Colossus (Facial Performance) - Greg LaSalle
Liefeld - Rob Liefeld
Elderly Man - David Longworth
Soldier #1 - Michael Neumeyer
Ten Year Old Boy - Sean Quan
Thug #3 - Anthony J Sacco
Biker in strip club - David Santana
Guadalajaran Mother - Olesia Shewchuk
Fight Club Spectator - Bronwyne Sloley
Biker - Dan Zachary