This is the origin story of former Special Forces operative turned mercenary Wade Wilson, who after being subjected to a rogue experiment that leaves him with accelerated healing powers, adopts the alter ego Deadpool. Armed with his new abilities and a dark, twisted sense of humor, Deadpool hunts down the man who nearly destroyed his life.
Director: Tim Miller
Writer: Rhett Reese, Paul Wernick
Production: 20th Century Fox
Released: 12 Feb 2016
Awards: Nominated for 2 Golden Globes. Another 27 wins & 73 nominations.
Movie Video Clips
I give you
But it rhymes with Polverine
I had another Liam Neeson nightmare
What the shit
I get why you're so pissy
Is that you
McAvoy or Stewart
All dinosaurs feared the T Rex
You're probably thinking
Time to make the chimi fuckin' changas
You're about to be killed by a zamboni
The day I decide to become a crime...
You're a lovely lady
A fourth wall break inside a fourth wall...
Here's what I'm actually gonna do
Do you like what you see
I'd go with you
But don't swallow
Check it out
Think of it like spring cleaning
Here's the thing
Finish fucking her the fuck up
You may be wondering
Rich Corinthian leather
I'm touching myself tonight
Can I come and visit you between the...
Your poor wife
What if I told you we can cure your...
Well I hate to break it to you
Have you decided what you're gonna say...
Why the fancy red suit
I should've come and found you sooner
Did I leave the stove on
Go be a big brother to someone
If I never see you again
Why such a douche this morning
Right up Main Street
How can I help you
I wouldn't do that if I were you
I'm a teenage girl
Vanessa's already working on plan's A
Have you seen this man
You've been warned before
How's the Kullen coming along
You can't buy love
I bet it feels huge in this hand
We can't allow this
Are you there God
What is that
Coming on to our stage right now
This my shit
There are no words
Cue the music
Kinda lonesome back here
Nice to see you
We both know that cancer is a shit show
You got something in your teeth
Do you have off switch
We have everything we need now
This is confusing
What's my name
Is Ajax your actual name
A heavily armed child
I presume a crisp high five
I hear you grow back body parts now
I've been traveling to exotic places
There's the money shot
Nothing warms my heart more than a...
Not out of the woods yet
That's all right
He's tied up in the trunk
She's like Robin to my Batman
Love is a beautiful thing
'Cause she knows you
Use seltzer water and lemon juice for...
You ate breakfast
I give a guy a pavement facial
Welcome to Sister Margaret's
I never carry a wallet when I'm working
Here we go
You're not clowning
You know the funniest part of this
What if I just held on and never let go
I wish I'd never heard of Craigslist
And maximum effort
I'm a bad guy who is paid to fuck up...
They pull down a gaggle of ass
I'd hit that
Did I say this was a love story
I told you
I miss cocaine
My old boyfriend
It reeks like old lady pants in here
Who brought this twinkly man
Not often a dude ruins your face
I don't want to
Go get her
You little spider monkey
I was a patient here once myself
Am I crazy
Fucking Wade Wilson
Ever hear of the one legged man in the...
Did you ever see 127 Hours
You're still here
Four or five moments
Ve been thinking
- Yeah, little help. Okay, um, just, I have to keep my hands on the wheel. Excuse me. Whoo! Ah, Dopinder. Pool. Dead.
- They won't disappoint. They'd better not. And what about next month's shipment? There won't be one. You're not the only one with a war to win. That won't do.
- See, we've had this small disruption to our supply chain...
- We'd appreciate your patience.
- Okay. We'll deliver in full the following month.
- Pleasure doing business with you.
- Oh, shit! I forgot my ammo bag. Shall we turn back? No, no time. Fuck it. I got this. 9, 10, 11, 12 bullets, or bust. Right here!
- That's, uh, $27.50. I... I never carry a wallet when I'm working. Ruins the lines of my suit. Oh. But, uh, how about a crisp high five? Okay. Merry Christmas. And a convivial Tuesday in Ap
- I'm looking for Francis! Have you seen this man? Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.
- I've never said this, but don't swallow.
- Shit. Did I leave the stove on?
- Now, breaking news. A multi-car collision turned shots fired on the crosstown expressway this morning. Gridlock has kept police from the scene. Residents are advised to remain in their homes.
- Wait! You may be wondering, "Why the red suit?" Well, that's so bad guys can't see me bleed. This guy's got the right idea. He wore the brown pants.
- Fine! I only have 12 bullets... so you're gonna have to share! Let's count them down.
- 10! Shit! Nine. Fuck. Eight. Shit-fuck!
- Bad Deadpool. Seven. Good Deadpool.
- Four... Gotcha. Right up main street.
- Three, two! Stupid! Worth it.
- I'm touching myself tonight. Francis! Francis... What the shit-biscuit! Where you at, Francis?
- Really? Rolling up the sleeves?
- You're probably thinking, "My boyfriend said this was a superhero movie... "but that guy in the red suit just turned "that other guy into a fucking kabab!" Well, I may be super, but I'm no he
- Pineapple and olive? Sweet and salty. The fuck are you? The fuck you doing in my crib... Is it burnt crust? I... God, I hope not. Um... Whoa... Man, look, if this is about that poker game. I
- Anyhoo, tell me something... what situation isn't improved by pizza? Do you happen to know a Meghan Orflosky? Getting that right? Orflosky? Orlovsky? Yeah? Good.
- Because she knows you. Jeremy, I belong to a group of guys who take a dime to beat a fella down. And little Meghan, she's not made of money, but lucky for her... I got a soft spot. But I'm a.
- You even look in her general direction again... and you will learn in the worst of ways that I have some hard spots too.
- That came out wrong. Or did it?
- You've heard the last of Jeremy. He's sorry. No friggin' way.
- Should've brought my roller blades. Show these kids how it's done. Oh. And that's why we do it. But mostly the money. Hey, think you could fuck up my step-dad? I give a guy a pavement facial,
- You're my hero. No-no-no-no. That I ain't!
- Nope. Never will be. Oh. Fuck you, Wade. I'm just a bad guy who gets paid to fuck up worse guys. Welcome to Sister Margaret's. It's like a job fair for mercenaries. Think of us as really fucke
- Hey, and I ain't taking any babysitting money, all right? Make sure that gets back to Ms... Orlovsky. Yeah, her. You sure? Hmm. You know, for a merc, you're pretty warm-blooded. I bet you le
- - Cheers. To your health. - Fuck you. Come here, you fat fuck! That's a new stool.
- Whoa! Took his ass out! All right, move. Move, move, move. Buck, go rest. Boothe got hit then went down.
- Nobody wins today. Nice try, Wade. You got me. I picked Boothe in the dead pool. Who did you pick? Yeah, Wade, about that, um... You did not bet on me to die.
- You bet on me to die. Wow! Motherfucker, you're the world's worst friend. Well, joke's on you. I'm living to 102. And then dying. Like the city of Detroit. I'm sorry. I just... I wanted to win
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... Baby, are you sure you wanna shoot your whole wad? Uh... Tight.
- Hopefully you, later tonight?
- Hey, what can I get for, uh, $275 and a... a Yogurtland rewards card? Baby, about 48 minutes of whatever the fuck you want. And a low-fat dessert.
- Did she just put a gift card in your mouth? It's time to put balls in holes. You said whatever I want. I get it. You love skee ball. Apparently more than you love vagina. That's a tough call.
- Uh-oh. Uh-oh. The limited edition Voltron: Defender of the Universe ring, por favor. Okay. Here we go. Had my eye on this sucker for a while. And I will take the pencil eraser. Okay. You ar
- How long can you keep this up? All year?
- Happy Chinese New Year. Year of the Dog.
- Relax. And Happy International Women's Day.
- Ow, ow. Wade? Sorry. Happy Halloween. Happy Halloween.
- If your left leg is Thanksgiving... and your right leg is Christmas... can I visit you between the holidays? That sweater is terrible. But red looks good on you. Red's your color. Brings out
- Will you, uh... stick it in my... Marry me?
- Uh... Jinx? Huh. Where were you hiding that? Nowhere. They say one month's salary. So, uh... You mean? I do. That's my line.
- I love you, Wade Wilson. You're supposed to... So that's a... Yes! Whoo! Yes!
- I feel just like a little girl.
- What if I just held on and never let go? Just ride a bitch's back, like Yoda on Luke. Oh, Star Wars jokes. Empire. Jesus Christ. It's like I made you in a computer.
- Let's see. All right, wee break. Shake it, yeah.
- Here's the thing. Life is an endless series of train-wrecks... with only brief, commercial-like breaks of happiness. This had been the ultimate commercial break.
- Which meant it was time to return to our regularly scheduled program. What the... Oh, my God. Wade?
- You're clowning. You're not clowning? I sense clowns. People react to news of late-stage cancer differently. There are certainly options we can look into. New drugs are being developed every d
- So what do we do? Surely there is something we can do. My uncle Ivan was diagnosed with thyroid cancer... and there were all these new experimental drugs from Germany. Vanessa's already workin
- Now, if I were a 200-pound sack of assholes named Francis, where would I hide?
- A hush falls over the crowd as rookie sensation Wade W. Wilson... out of Regina, Saskatchewan, lines up the shot.
- His form looks good. And that's why Regina rhymes with fun. Ladies and gentlemen, what you're witnessing... is sweet dick-kicking revenge. Oh! Giving him the business. Incoming! This is taking
- Looking good, Francis. Well rested. Like you've been pitching, not catching. Ringing any bells? No?
- Well, hello, gorgeous. Yeah, like I got bit by a radioactive Shar-Pei. Yeah. And whose fault is that, huh, Francis? Yeah, time to undo what you did to this butterface. Please, you should than
- Now, I'm about to do to you what Limp Bizkit did to music in the late 90s.
- I think we can all agree that shit just went sideways in the most colossal way. Well, maybe not the most. Uh... This is my most prized possession. Wham? No, no, no. Wham! Make It Big is the al
- Like, a Yakov-Smirnoff- opening-for-the Spin-Doctors-at-the- Iowa-State-Fair shit-show.
- And under no circumstances will I take you to that show. I want you to remember me.
- Not the ghost of Christmas me. Well, I wanna remember us. I swear to God, I will find you in the next life... and I'm gonna boom-box Careless Whisper outside your window. Wham!
- No one is boom-boxing shit. Okay?
- Besides, I just realized something. You win. Your life is officially way more fucked up than mine.
- Weas. You look like you need a Blow Job and a shower. Though courtesy calls for the latter first. How about three shots of Patron? Or how about Triticum aestivum, wheatgrass. Excellent for t
- Mr. Wilson. How can I help you? Besides luring children into a panel van. I understand you've recently been diagnosed with terminal cancer. Stalker alert. It's my job. Recruitment. I'm sorry
- What if I told you we can cure your cancer? And what's more, give you abilities most men only dream of?
- I'd say that you sound like an infomercial, but not a good one, like Slap Chop. More Shake Weight-y. The world needs extraordinary soldiers. We won't just make you better. We will make you b
- Hey, what's going on? Hey. Sorry. I had a Liam Neeson nightmare. I dreamt I kidnapped his daughter and he just wasn't having it.
- Hey, uh, they've made three of those movies. At some point you have to wonder if he's just a bad parent. Hmm.
- The worst part about cancer isn't what it does to you... but what it does to the people you love. Who knew if this guy could save my life... but I knew there was only one way that I could save
- Isn't that what superheroes do?
- Okay. Let's pro-con this superhero thing. Pro: They pull down a gaggle of ass. Local dry cleaning discounts. Lucrative film deals, both origin stories and larger ensemble team movies. Con: Th
- So, what, you're like, uh, his sidekick? No. Trainee. Let me guess. X-Men left you behind on what? Shit detail? What does that make you? Pretending you're not here, Negasonic Teenage Warhead.
- You got me in a box here. Aha! We can't allow this, Deadpool. Please, come quietly. You big chrome cock-gobbler! That's not nice. You're really gonna fuck this up for me? Trust me, that whee
- That guy was already up there when I got here. Wade, you are better than this. Join us. Use your powers for good. Heads up. Be a superhero. Listen! The day I decide to become a crime-fightin
- That's not good. Wade, please. Cock shot! Oh, your poor wife. You really should stop.
- All the dinosaurs feared the T. rex.
- I promise this gets worse for you, big boy! This is embarrassing. Please, stay down. You ever hear of the one-legged man in the ass-kicking contest? Do you have off switch? Yeah, it's right ne
- Let us go talk to the Professor. McAvoy or Stewart? These timelines are so confusing. "Dead or alive, you're coming with me!" You will recover, Wade. You always do.
- You ever see 127 Hours? Spoiler alert.
- Nasty. Oh, there's the money shot, baby. Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret.
- Rock, meet bottom. And when life ends up breathtakingly fucked... you can generally trace it back to one big, bad decision. The one that sent you down the road to Shitsburgh. This? Well, this w
- This place seems sanitary. My first request is warmer hands. Oh! And, Jesus, a warmer table.
- We should really come up with a safe word, fellas. I'm thinking "pork and beans."
- Aren't you a little strong for a lady? I'm calling wang.
- What's up with the matches? Oral fixation or just a big Stallone fan? Patience, Angel. All in good time. Are you here for the turndown service, or what?
- We have another talker. I'm just excited about my first day at superhero camp. Shut the fuck up.
- Mr. Wilson, my name's Ajax. I manage this workshop. Ah, my welcome speech used to be full of euphemisms like... "This may hurt a little." "This may cause you some discomfort." But I've grown bl
- You've heard that whole "make an omelet, break some eggs" bit, right? I'm about to hurt you, Wade. I was a patient here once myself, you know. The treatment affects everyone differently. It mad
- Thanks! Thank you. Thank you. You have something in your teeth. Right in the middle there. Just, I don't... A little nugget of romaine lettuce or something.
- It's been bothering me for a long time.
- Ah, made you look. Hey, is Ajax your actual name? Because it sounds suspiciously made up. What is it, really? Kevin? Bruce? Scott? Mitch? The Rickster? Is it Basil Fawlty? Oh, joke away. One
- He's all yours. Oh, come on. You're gonna leave me all alone here. With less-angry Rosie O'Donnell?
- This is how it's going to work. Adrenaline acts as a catalyst for the serum... so we're going to have to make you suffer. If you're lucky, the mutant genes will activate and manifest in a spe
- If not, well, we'll have to keep on hurting you...
- in new and different ways, each more painful than the last...
- You mean a bucket list? Like a fuck-it list. I'd really like to light a spliff off the Olympic torch. Pass it to me right after. Let's not forget naked tandem base-jumping with the WNBA's Sa
- Making banana pancakes for my kids.
- I wanna see Vanessa. You're lovely. I don't know about anyone else, but I'm touched. We were just joking. No, no. It's okay. I encourage distractions. Wouldn't want you giving up on us, now wo
- F, R, A, N, C, I... Oops! Snagged the dry cleaning tag off your lab coat.
- FYI, I could probably get you the superhero discount. You are so relentlessly annoying. Thanks. Never heard that before. Why don't you do us all a favor and shut the fuck up? Or I'll sew your
- If this doesn't unlock your mutation, then, well... nothing will. Now, what we're going to do is lower the oxygen concentration in the air... to the exact point you feel like you're suffocating
- Maybe just mow the occasional lawn. What the fuck is wrong with you?
- You're never going home after this. Now there's a brave face. Wait, wait! Wait. Wait.
- Seriously, you actually have something in your teeth now.
- Enjoy your weekend. "Weekend"? Back up. Weekend?
- Did I say this was a love story? No, it's a horror movie.
- Fucking hell. Looks like someone lost his shot at Homecoming King. What have you done to me? I've merely raised your stress levels high enough to trigger a mutation. You sadistic fuck! I've c
- Yeah, I've seen similar side-effects before. I could cure them...
- Now, I'm gonna shut you in again, Wade. Not because I need to.
- Oh, you smell like shit. Whoa! Motherfucker. Hey, hey, hey. It's all right, it's all right. I think we owe him that one, yeah? You take off. Go on. Off you go.
- Sorry, Francis. My lips are sealed.
- You don't want to kill me. I'm the only one who can fix your ugly mug.
- I didn't just get the cure to el cancer... I got the cure to el everything.
- But there was only one thing... that really mattered.
- Oh, that must hurt. Thank you so much.
- God, he's so fucking gnarly. Look at his face. Oh, my God. Poor guy. Honey, don't stare. Freak.
- No, just... Just Deadpool, yeah. Just Deadpool. To you, Mr. Pool. Deadpool. That sounds like a fucking franchise.
- This shit's gonna have nuts in it. Where's Francis?
- Seltzer water and lemon for blood. Or wear red. Dumbass.
- Don't make me ask twice. Where... is Francis? He made me ask twice. Is the mask muffling my voice?
- You're about to be killed by a Zamboni. Where's Francis?
- No! Please! Oh, God! I'm so sorry! Oh! You little spider monkey!
- Where... is... Francis? This is confusing. Is it sexist to hit you? Is it more sexist to not hit you? I mean, the line gets real... blurry. WHERE IS FRANCIS? Tell me where your fucking boss i
- Nice to see you, Jared. I'll take the footlong... Fully loaded.
- Whoa, whoa! 41 confirmed kills. Now it's 89. About to be 90. Mr. Wilson? Ding-ding. You're looking very alive. Ha! Only on the outside! This is not going to end well for me, is it? This is
- Oh, you'll tell me. But first... You might wanna look away for this. Now this little piggy went to...
- Hop in! Great day for a ride.
- And we all know how this turned out.
- Whoops! You weren't meant to see that.
- We're here. Sorry about bleeding in all your garbage.
- Seltzer water and lemon for blood. Whoo! Some kinds of anger can't be managed... like the kind where your year-long plan ends with the wrong guy getting dismembered! That said, when it comes
- Morning, sleepyhead. It smells like old lady pants in here. Yes, I'm old. I wear pants. But you're no lady. Oh! So comfy. Upside of being blind: I've never seen you in Crocs. You mean my big,
- Sit on a stick. Bactin? Yeah. Bactin should do it. How's that Kullen coming along? IKEA doesn't assemble itself, you know. You're telling me. I don't mind the Kullen. It's an improvement on
- I wish I never heard of Craigslist. And I quote, "Looking for roommate, "blind to life's imperfections. "Must be good with hands." Or would you rather I build the IKEA, and you pay rent? Why
- Arm. Catching him was my only chance to be hot again, get my super sexy ex back... and prevent this shit from happening to someone else. So, yeah, today was about as much fun as a sandpaper d
- Found out who our friend in the red suit is.
- Fucking Wade Wilson. I suppose I'd wear a mask too if I had a face like that. I only wish I healed the same.
- Still, we'll put him out of our misery. On our terms. Right. And when he heals? He can't. Not if there's nothing left of him to heal. You know, it's funny. I almost miss the fucker.
- I like a challenge. But he's bad for business. Now let's go find him.
- Tylenol PM? You can stick that where you stuck the Bactin. I raided my stash of wisdom tooth Percocet... and I am orbiting fucking Saturn right now.
- I heard you might be able to point me in the direction of a, um, friend of mine. Name of Wade Wilson.
- Sorry. I don't know the name.
- Hey, you're not supposed to be behind the bar.
- I've seen this girl. Ah, this must be Vanessa. I've heard so much about you.
- Um, sweetheart, you might wanna look around. This isn't really the place to do something like that. Easy, Angel. Put the little man down. We have everything we need now. You sure? You don't w
- Whoo. Thanks for having my back, guys.
- Wade, we have a fucking problem. And by "we," I mean "you." Ah, I can't believe I'm doing this. Is there a word for half afraid, half angry? Yeah, "afrangry", I guess. Have you decided what
- Hey, coming onto our stage right now... give it up for Chastity!
- Or as I like to call her, Irony. Better find her fast before numbnuts does. How do you know she's in here? Because I'm constantly stalking that fox.
- Every time I see her, it's like the first time... Especially from this angle.
- You can't buy love, but you can rent it for three minutes.
- Ah, you weak motherfucker! Come on! Come on, get it together. This isn't about me, this is about Vanessa.
- Someone out back asking for you. Something about, uh, an old boyfriend.
- The weird, curvy edges. Like a jigsaw puzzle.
- You have Wade Wilson to thank for this.
- Hey. Hey! Where'd she go? Uh, I saw her head to the back. Go get her, tiger.
- Motherfucker! Wait, wait. Let's... Just... Cock juggling... We can talk about what we're gonna... Jiminy! Fuck face! Okay, or you can hit that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck! Fuck! No, no. All ri
- That's about 3,000 rounds. We all know what I can do with 12. Hey, hey, careful with that, Ronnie Milsap! We're downrange.
- I was gonna spend the night assembling the Borje, but this is holding my interest. I told you, we're going with the Urvaj, not the Borje. Get it through your head or get out of fuck town. Shit
- Wade... I'd go with you, but I don't want to.
- Uh... Listen, Al... if I never see you again, I want you to know that I love you very much. And also, uh, there's about 116 kilos of cocaine buried somewhere in the apartment... right next t
- Thanks, dickless. And I mean you. Wow. You're a talker too. You and Wade. I've been trying to tell you assholes, you've got the wrong girl. My old boyfriend, he's dead. See, I thought that to
- Ripley, from Alien 3! Fuck, you're old. Fake laugh. Hiding real pain. Go get Silver Balls. You guys going for a bite? Early bird special? Oh, like there's something wrong with eating before s
- I'm gonna wait out here, okay? It's a big house. It's funny that I only ever see two of you. It's almost like the studio couldn't afford another X-Man.
- And that is why, in my opinion... the movie Cocoon is pure pornography. Who brought this twinkly man? Twinkly, but deadly. My chrome-penised friend back there has agreed to do me this solid.
- What was that? Uh... That was Bandhu in the trunk. Ban who? My romantic rival Bandhu. He's tied up in the trunk. I'm doing as you said, DP. I plan to gut him like a tandoori fish, then dump
- I presume a crisp high five? For you? 10. Okay, guys, let's get out there and make a difference. You know what to do. Knock 'em dead, Pool Boy! Time to make the chimi-fuckin'-changas. Not of
- Hey. Where's your duffle bag?
- Bandhu? Leave a message and have a happy day. God damn it! I'm gonna do this the old fashioned way... with two swords and maximum effort. Cue the music.
- Wade Wilson! What's my name? Oh, I'mma fuckin' spell it out for ya.
- Go get some. Superhero landing. She's gonna do a superhero landing. Wait for it.
- Whoo! Superhero landing! You know, that's really hard on your knees. Totally impractical. They all do it. You're a lovely lady, but I'm saving myself for Francis. That's why I brought him. I
- I mean, that's why I brought her? Oh, no, finish your tweet. It's not... That's... Just give us a second. Yeah. There you go. Hashtag it. Go get her, tiger.
- Oh, I so pity the dude who pressures her into prom sex. All right, then. Fire!
- Finish fucking her the fuck up! Language, please. Suck a cock.
- Look away, child. Look away!
- Wait! Wait! Cease fire! Cease fire! Fellas! Hey! Hey! You only work for that shit-spackled muppet fart. So, I'mma give you a chance for y'all to lay down your firearms... in exchange for pre
- Bob? Wade? Oh, my God, I haven't seen you since... Jacksonville. Fridays. Since TGI Fridays. Well, what the hell! God, come here, you.
- How are the kids? Good? And Gail, she still fixing that tuna casserole? So good. But bad for the waistline, if you know what I'm talking about.
- Your... On the left. You are beautiful woman. That is so sweet. Uh... Thanks.
- Yoo-hoo! Does he write you notes too? He's such a romantic. Don't worry, baby. I'm comin'.
- Motherfucker should have worn his brown pants.
- You were right, beautiful. Red really is my color. Wade? Don't worry, baby... I'mma get you out of that shit-box. What better way to crawl back inside that head of yours? Oh, you never left.
- I hope they blocked pain to your every last nerve. 'Cause I'mma go lookin'! I hear you grow back body parts now, Wade. When I'm finished... parts will have to grow back you. Good one. Yep, th
- Fine. Fists. Oh, sounds like your last Saturday night.
- Hang in there, baby! Wade! I gotcha!
- I got a plan. You're not gonna like it.
- Don't worry. I'm totally on top of this.
- Ah! Damn it! Maximum effort!
- There are no words! Me and you are headed to fix this butterface. What?
- You stupid fucking idiot. Did you really think there was a cure... for that? What? You heard me.
- So, you mean to say... after all this, you can't fix me? It sounds even stupider when you say it. Like the kind of stupid who admits he can't do the one thing I'm keeping him alive for?
- What's my name? Who fucking cares? Wade!
- Four or five moments. I'm sorry? Four or five moments, that's all it takes. Be a hero.
- Everyone thinks it's a full-time job. Wake up a hero, brush your teeth a hero, go to work a hero. Not true. Over a lifetime, there are only four or five moments that really matter. Moments wh
- You were droning on. Sure, I may be stuck looking like pepperoni flatbread... but at least fuckface won't heal from that. If wearing superhero tights... means sparing psychopaths... then maybe
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. For everything, I'm sorry for leaving...
- I'm sorry for not cowboying up sooner. It's been rough couple of years. Rough?
- I live in a crackhouse. With a family of 12.
- Every night we spoon for warmth. Everybody fights for Noelle. She's the fattest. There's nothing that we don't share. Floor space, dental floss, even condoms.
- I should have come and found you sooner.
- But, baby, the guy under this mask, he ain't the same one that you remember.
- All right. Yeah, just... Ow. Like a Band-Aid, just give it a... Owdie 5,000. Wait, wait, wait...
- After a brief adjustment period... and a bunch of drinks...
- I'm not the same underneath this suit, either. Super-penis. Come on, Wade. Language. Young one is present. What are you still doing? Get out of here. Go make yourself useful! You, go be a real
- What in the ass? That was not mean. I'm proud of you! We will make an X-Man of you yet, Wade. For a second there, it felt like we were three mini-lion robots... coming together to form one su
- And now, for the moment I've all been waiting for.
- See? You don't need to be a superhero to get the girl. The right girl will bring out the hero in you. Now, let's finish this epic wide shot. Pull out. There we go, that looks nice. That's gonn
- It's over. Go home. Oh, you're expecting a teaser for Deadpool 2. Well, we don't have that kind of money. What are you expecting? Sam Jackson to show up? With an eye patch and a saucy little l
- But I can tell you one thing, and it's a bit of a secret. For the sequel, we're gonna have Cable. Amazing character. Bionic arm, time travel. We have no idea who we're gonna cast yet, but it c
Wade - Ryan Reynolds
Dopinder - Karan Soni
Ajax - Ed Skrein
Warlord - Michael Benyaer
Colossus - Stefan Kapicic
Negasonic Teenage Warhead - Brianna Hildebrand
Jeremy (Pizza Guy) - Style Dayne
Gavin Merchant - Kyle Cassie
Meghan Orlovsky - Taylor Hickson
Teen Girl #1 - Ayzee
Teen Girl #2 - Naika Toussaint
Buck - Randal Reeder
Weasel - T.J. Miller
Boothe - Isaac C. Singleton Jr.
Vanessa - Morena Baccarin
Arcade Ticket Taker - Justyn Shippelt
Oncologist - Donna Yamamoto
Recruiter - Jed Rees
David Cunningham - Hugh Scott
Angel Dust - Gina Carano
Chinatown Merchant - Cindy Piper
Whisper Girlfriend - Emily Haine
Whisper Boyfriend - Aatash Amir
Pool Hall Goon - Chad Riley
Fight Club Boss - Paul Belsito
Garbage Truck Driver - Darcey Johnson
Blind Al - Leslie Uggams
Super Soldier #1 - Kyle Rideout
Super Soldier #2 (as Jason Day) - Jason William Day
Strip Club DJ - Stan Lee
No5 Orange Manager - Ben Wilkinson
Strip Club Worker (as Rachel Shaw) - Rachel Sheen
Flight Deck Guard - Paul Lazenby
Bob - Rob Hayter
Waitress Kelly - Kayla Adams
Hospital Doctor - Brad Archie
Bar Patron - Colleen Bradford
Stripclub Pole Performer - Heather Ashley Chase
Guadalajaran Nurse - Fabiola Colmenero
Stripper - Victoria De Mare
Thug #2 - John Dryden
Guy in Strip Club - Jesse Michael Fullington
Strip Club Spectator - David Hardware
Strip Club Patron - Matthew Hoglie
Fight Club Spectator - Tony Chris Kazoleas
Colossus (Facial Performance) - Greg LaSalle
Liefeld - Rob Liefeld
Elderly Man - David Longworth
Soldier #1 - Michael Neumeyer
Ten Year Old Boy - Sean Quan
Thug #3 - Anthony J Sacco
Biker in strip club - David Santana
Guadalajaran Mother - Olesia Shewchuk
Fight Club Spectator - Bronwyne Sloley
Biker - Dan Zachary