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"Epic Movie" quotes

Epic Movie poster
A spoof on previous years' epic movies (The Da Vinci Code (2006), The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (2005) + 20 more), TV series, music videos and celebs. 4 orphans are on an epic adventure.

Director: Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer
Writer: Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer
Production: N/A
Year: 2007
MetaScore: 17/100
ImdbRating: 2.4
BoxOffice: $39,739,367
Released: 26 Jan 2007
Awards: 2 wins & 3 nominations
This crystal will finally put an end to the resistance - Epic Movie 00:28 This crystal will finally put an end to the resistance And And the White Bitch doesn't care about black people - Epic Movie 00:07 And And the White Bitch doesn't care about black people And a mono brow Come again - Epic Movie 00:28 And a mono brow Come again What are you gonna do about it - Epic Movie 00:04 What are you gonna do about it Narrator And so it was that Peter Susan Edward and Lucy - Epic Movie 00:23 Narrator And so it was that Peter Susan Edward and Lucy Hope you chicks are on the pill - Epic Movie 00:09 Hope you chicks are on the pill I'm a shape changer - Epic Movie 00:05 I'm a shape changer We just punk'd Edward Schwow Schwow Yeah - Epic Movie 00:10 We just punk'd Edward Schwow Schwow Yeah We may not have the numbers on our side or the weapons she possesses - Epic Movie 00:10 We may not have the numbers on our side or the weapons she... Mono brow Mono brow King wants a mono brow - Epic Movie 00:05 Mono brow Mono brow King wants a mono brow We'll stand behind you Peter - Epic Movie 00:13 We'll stand behind you Peter Welcome My name is Harry Potter - Epic Movie 00:11 Welcome My name is Harry Potter But the prophecy says But the prophecy the prophecy - Epic Movie 00:15 But the prophecy says But the prophecy the prophecy But we have something far more powerful - Epic Movie 00:06 But we have something far more powerful Ow Was the fight over - Epic Movie 00:05 Ow Was the fight over The new Gnarnia will be a democracy - Epic Movie 00:12 The new Gnarnia will be a democracy And big flabby grandma arms - Epic Movie 00:04 And big flabby grandma arms The resistance has found out - Epic Movie 00:04 The resistance has found out Oh my God You shot me in the fucking eye That really hurts - Epic Movie 00:10 Oh my God You shot me in the fucking eye That really hurts I hate those fuckin' kids - Epic Movie 00:05 I hate those fuckin' kids A chocolate river - Epic Movie 00:16 A chocolate river Borat Jagshemash - Epic Movie 00:09 Borat Jagshemash Hey look Nicole Richie - Epic Movie 00:04 Hey look Nicole Richie And is going to launch it in 24 hours - Epic Movie 00:04 And is going to launch it in 24 hours Take that Kumar Huh - Epic Movie 00:05 Take that Kumar Huh But our parents Killed by the White Bitch - Epic Movie 00:05 But our parents Killed by the White Bitch Children do you want to know - Epic Movie 00:25 Children do you want to know Gasps Oh shit A talking beaver - Epic Movie 00:04 Gasps Oh shit A talking beaver Tomorrow we fight - Epic Movie 00:06 Tomorrow we fight May I present the kings and queens of Gnarnia - Epic Movie 00:18 May I present the kings and queens of Gnarnia Let's start things off with a bang shall we - Epic Movie 00:15 Let's start things off with a bang shall we He's unleashing his powers - Epic Movie 00:37 He's unleashing his powers Lucy Willy Who wants to play with Willy - Epic Movie 00:04 Lucy Willy Who wants to play with Willy Badonkadonk - Epic Movie 00:04 Badonkadonk Chuck Norris rules - Epic Movie 00:05 Chuck Norris rules Welcome My name is Harry Potter - Epic Movie 00:05 Welcome My name is Harry Potter What are you doing - Epic Movie 00:08 What are you doing Oh What's wrong - Epic Movie 00:04 Oh What's wrong Laughing Chocolate - Epic Movie 00:10 Laughing Chocolate Behold my white castle - Epic Movie 00:11 Behold my white castle

Cast

Edward - Kal Penn
Peter Pervertsky - Adam Campbell
White Bitch - Jennifer Coolidge
Lucy - Jayma Mays
Susan Pervertsky - Faune Chambers Watkins