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It gave Joshua a stomachache.
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Eric Andre: Legalize Everything

It gave Joshua a stomachache." You can cut the tip of my dick off,but I can't go to Red...

It gave Joshua a stomachache." You can cut the tip of my dick off,
but I can't go to Red Lobster?

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.753
It gave Joshua a stomachache."
00:00:06.505 --> 00:00:09.842
You can cut the tip of my dick off, but I can't go to Red Lobster?
Duration
10 seconds
Views
22
Timestamp in Movie
00:39:02
Uploaded
Jun 04, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Eric Andre takes the stage in New Orleans and tackles flawed fast-food icons, the wonders of autofill and the bizarre choice for the "Cops" theme song.
So, he flipped houses and renovated bathrooms and shit. - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:04
So, he flipped houses and renovated bathrooms and shit.
So this guy is like Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:06
So this guy is like Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor,
He's like, "Do you want some water, or... - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:04
He's like, "Do you want some water, or...
Pinot Grigio?" - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:06
Pinot Grigio?"
I kicked off this tour in Europe, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:07
I kicked off this tour in Europe,
And I come back here, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:05
And I come back here,
And the reason we got like this, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:06
And the reason we got like this,
And the pilgrims were the worst, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:07
And the pilgrims were the worst,
And they thought western Europe was Sodom and Gomorra, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:08
And they thought western Europe was Sodom and Gomorra,
So, they all hopped on the Mayflower in 1620, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:10
So, they all hopped on the Mayflower in 1620,
And Calvin, John Calvin, their spiritual forefather, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:18
And Calvin, John Calvin, their spiritual forefather,
And he would have his fucking critics tortured and murdered. - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:05
And he would have his fucking critics tortured and murdered.
He had his stepson and daughter-in-law - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:06
He had his stepson and daughter-in-law
And he fucking-- He would drown single pregnant women alive - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:08
And he fucking-- He would drown single pregnant women alive
This guy is the guy that continues - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:09
This guy is the guy that continues
So I beg of you, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:15
So I beg of you,
Go to Geneva, Switzerland where John Calvin's buried, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:10
Go to Geneva, Switzerland where John Calvin's buried,
And, uh... I text messaged this girl, Jessie, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:07
And, uh... I text messaged this girl, Jessie,
I texted her, "Come over." - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:15
I texted her, "Come over."
So, my follow-up text was 10,000 times worse. I go, - Eric Andre: Legalize Everything 00:23
So, my follow-up text was 10,000 times worse. I go,