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"Evan Almighty" quotes

Evan Almighty poster
God contacts Congressman Evan Baxter and tells him to build an ark in preparation for a great flood.

Director: Tom Shadyac
Writer: Steve Oedekerk, Joel Cohen, Alec Sokolow
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy, family, fantasy
Year: 2007
MetaScore: 37/100
ImdbRating: 5.4
BoxOffice: $100,462,298
Released: 22 Jun 2007
Awards: 2 wins & 11 nominations

122 video clips

GodEvan BaxterJoan BaxterCongressmenRitaEugeneArk ReporterEd CarsonMartyJon StewartCongressman Chuck LongCongressman Long
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Sheeeeep - Evan Almighty 00:04 Sheeeeep Oh my God - Evan Almighty 00:13 Oh my God Do the dance - Evan Almighty 00:18 Do the dance But before we sign off we'd like to congratulate our very own Evan Baxter - Evan Almighty 00:20 But before we sign off we'd like to congratulate our... The dam Congressman - Evan Almighty 00:35 The dam Congressman Let me ask you something - Evan Almighty 00:30 Let me ask you something How do we change the world - Evan Almighty 00:14 How do we change the world Honey maybe God didn't mean a literal flood - Evan Almighty 00:17 Honey maybe God didn't mean a literal flood I pledge allegiance to the flag - Evan Almighty 00:21 I pledge allegiance to the flag Evan what happened - Evan Almighty 00:15 Evan what happened The way things go around here - Evan Almighty 00:06 The way things go around here Did you say build a boat - Evan Almighty 00:12 Did you say build a boat What in the world I can't even get my cat to use the litter box - Evan Almighty 00:06 What in the world I can't even get my cat to use the... Evan Baxter You have gone from newsman to congressman to caveman - Evan Almighty 00:13 Evan Baxter You have gone from newsman to congressman to... If that comes out your front - Evan Almighty 00:06 If that comes out your front Get on the ark Everyone on the ark now - Evan Almighty 00:24 Get on the ark Everyone on the ark now Why do you sound like Evan Baxter but look like a Bee Gee - Evan Almighty 00:06 Why do you sound like Evan Baxter but look like a Bee Gee Is that a llama with a hammer - Evan Almighty 00:04 Is that a llama with a hammer Did you just do a wardrobe change - Evan Almighty 00:07 Did you just do a wardrobe change Why couldn't the man just buy a Corvette - Evan Almighty 00:05 Why couldn't the man just buy a Corvette This is too nice There's something crooked going on - Evan Almighty 00:06 This is too nice There's something crooked going on I am successful I'm powerful I'm handsome I'm happy - Evan Almighty 00:29 I am successful I'm powerful I'm handsome I'm... I can't shave Marty When I shave it grows back out - Evan Almighty 00:07 I can't shave Marty When I shave it grows back out I now issue a new commandment - Evan Almighty 00:07 I now issue a new commandment What Are you shooting up Rogaine - Evan Almighty 00:04 What Are you shooting up Rogaine Excuse me Do I know you - Evan Almighty 00:05 Excuse me Do I know you Can I tase him - Evan Almighty 00:03 Can I tase him There he is The head honcho The big kahuna - Evan Almighty 00:04 There he is The head honcho The big kahuna Evan what are you doing You have a pony tail on your face - Evan Almighty 00:10 Evan what are you doing You have a pony tail on your face He's filling the boat with two of every kind of animal - Evan Almighty 00:12 He's filling the boat with two of every kind of animal I'll tell you one thing these birds had a nice big meal before they flew in here - Evan Almighty 00:09 I'll tell you one thing these birds had a nice big meal... I love you - Evan Almighty 00:09 I love you Marty said that Long cut corners violated building codes - Evan Almighty 00:12 Marty said that Long cut corners violated building codes It's September 22 and we're all still here - Evan Almighty 00:08 It's September 22 and we're all still here With all these species what's being done about the feces - Evan Almighty 00:06 With all these species what's being done about the... That would be a good day to have chicken How about mom's chicken Huh - Evan Almighty 00:09 That would be a good day to have chicken How about... I'm just stressed and you are gone - Evan Almighty 00:04 I'm just stressed and you are gone Make thee an ark of gopher wood - Evan Almighty 00:07 Make thee an ark of gopher wood (ALARM RINGING) - Evan Almighty (ALARM RINGING) "Back to work"? - Evan Almighty "Back to work"? (BIRDS CHIRPING) - Evan Almighty (BIRDS CHIRPING) But before we sign off we'd like to congratulate our very own Evan Baxter - Evan Almighty But before we sign off we'd like to congratulate our... But, Evan, we have to talk about the ark. It has to come down. - Evan Almighty But, Evan, we have to talk about the ark. It has to come dow... Can I tase him - Evan Almighty Can I tase him Come on, Rita! - Evan Almighty Come on, Rita! Did you just do a wardrobe change - Evan Almighty Did you just do a wardrobe change Did you say build a boat - Evan Almighty Did you say build a boat Does this mean we're moving back home? - Evan Almighty Does this mean we're moving back home? Evan Baxter You have gone from newsman to congressman to caveman - Evan Almighty Evan Baxter You have gone from newsman to congressman to... Evan Baxter! You have gone from newsman to congressman to caveman. - Evan Almighty Evan Baxter! You have gone from newsman to congressman to ca... Evan, that was brilliant. Risky, but brilliant. - Evan Almighty Evan, that was brilliant. Risky, but brilliant. EVAN: Well, I guess they don't want to go. - Evan Almighty EVAN: Well, I guess they don't want to go. Evan what are you doing You have a pony tail on your face - Evan Almighty Evan what are you doing You have a pony tail on your face Evan what happened - Evan Almighty Evan what happened (EXCLAIMING) - Evan Almighty (EXCLAIMING) (EXCLAIMING) - Evan Almighty (EXCLAIMING) (EXCLAIMING) - Evan Almighty (EXCLAIMING) Excuse me Do I know you - Evan Almighty Excuse me Do I know you Genesis 6:14. - Evan Almighty Genesis 6:14. Get on the ark Everyone on the ark now - Evan Almighty Get on the ark Everyone on the ark now Good morning! - Evan Almighty Good morning! Goodbye, Evan. - Evan Almighty Goodbye, Evan. Ha, ha, ha! - Evan Almighty Ha, ha, ha! He's filling the boat with two of every kind of animal - Evan Almighty He's filling the boat with two of every kind of animal Hey! When you're on my lawn keep it in your pot! - Evan Almighty Hey! When you're on my lawn keep it in your pot! Hi. - Evan Almighty Hi. Honey maybe God didn't mean a literal flood - Evan Almighty Honey maybe God didn't mean a literal flood How do we change the world - Evan Almighty How do we change the world I am successful I'm powerful I'm handsome I'm happy - Evan Almighty I am successful I'm powerful I'm handsome I'm... I can't shave Marty When I shave it grows back out - Evan Almighty I can't shave Marty When I shave it grows back out I command thee halt! Stop! Whoa! - Evan Almighty I command thee halt! Stop! Whoa! I don't know what's going on, or what you're going through, - Evan Almighty I don't know what's going on, or what you're ... I know! I know. Whatever you do, you do because you love me! - Evan Almighty I know! I know. Whatever you do, you do because you love me! I now issue a new commandment, - Evan Almighty I now issue a new commandment, I now issue a new commandment - Evan Almighty I now issue a new commandment I think we can walk from here. - Evan Almighty I think we can walk from here. If that comes out your front - Evan Almighty If that comes out your front If that comes out your front - Evan Almighty If that comes out your front Is that a llama with a hammer - Evan Almighty Is that a llama with a hammer It's September 22 and we're all still here - Evan Almighty It's September 22 and we're all still here JOAN: Oh, my gosh. - Evan Almighty JOAN: Oh, my gosh. JON: Guess this comes as no surprise to those who remember his campaign promise, - Evan Almighty JON: Guess this comes as no surprise to those who remember h... LAUGHING I love you - Evan Almighty LAUGHING I love you (LAUGHING) - Evan Almighty (LAUGHING) Let me ask you something - Evan Almighty Let me ask you something Let me see that. - Evan Almighty Let me see that. (LIP-SYNCING) - Evan Almighty (LIP-SYNCING) LONG: All those in favor of the Public Land Act, please signify by saying, "Aye." - Evan Almighty LONG: All those in favor of the Public Land Act, please sign... Looks like the drought's finally over. Good news, eh, Congressman? - Evan Almighty Looks like the drought's finally over. Good news, eh, C...
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Cast

Evan Baxter - Steve Carell
God - Morgan Freeman
Joan Baxter - Lauren Graham
Dylan Baxter - Johnny Simmons
Jordan Baxter - Graham Phillips
All Cast