I hope you had a hell of a piss, Arnold!
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Brad Hamilton:
Yes, sir, can I help you? Businessman:
Uh, yes, this is not the best breakfast I've ever had and I'd like my money back. Brad Hamilton:
Uh, okay, I believe you have to fill out a form for that. Businessman:
Uh, no, I'd like my money back now. Brad Hamilton:
I'm sorry, it doesn't work that way. You see, I have to fill out a form and-- [looks down at the half-eaten breakfast] Brad Hamilton:
--well, you ate most of it, already, so... Businessman:
[points at the 100% Guaranteed sign]
You see that sign? It says "100 % Guaranteed". You know what the meaning of "guarantee" is? Did they teach you that here? Brad Hamilton:
Sir, I... Businessman:
Look, just put your little hand back into the cash register and give me my two dollars and seventy-five cents back, please... [looks at Brad's name tag] Businessman:
... Brad. Brad Hamilton:
Sir, if you'd just give me a minute, I'll find the forms. I'll take care of everything. [gets down to search under the counter] Businessman:
I don't have a minute. You made me late enough. I am so tired of dealing with incompetence. [coming out of the restroom, Arnold hears the angry customer and goes back in] Businessman:
It says "100 % Guaranteed", you moron! Brad Hamilton:
[jumps up angrily]
MISTER, IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP, I'M GONNA KICK ONE HUNDERED PERCENT OF YOUR ASS! [hearing the commotion, Dennis immediately appears] Dennis Taylor:
Uh, is there a problem here? Can I help you, sir? Businessman:
You bet you have a problem. Your employee here threatened me with violence. I'm surprised. I eat here, all the time, and I usually get good service until today. All I wanted was money back on this breakfast. It was a little undercooked and he threatens me with violence. Now, I'm going to speak to your supervisor... Dennis Taylor:
[holds up a hand to stop him]
Uh, I can take care of this. Mr. Hamilton, Did you threaten this customer with violence or use profanity in any way? Brad Hamilton:
Well, he insulted me, first. He called me a moron, Dennis. Dennis Taylor:
Answer me! Did you threaten this customer with violence or use profanity in any way? Brad Hamilton:
Yes! Dennis Taylor:
You're fired. [to the customer, who smiles happily at Brad] Dennis Taylor:
I'm sorry, sir, I'll refund your money, right now. [Brad angrily takes off his hat and apron and storms towards the exit] Dennis Taylor:
Hope you won't hold this against us. You know how kids are, these days. Here we are. Perhaps another breakfast? Brad Hamilton:
[slams his hand on the men's restroom door]
I hope you had a hell of a piss, Arnold!
Yes, sir, can I help you? Businessman:
Uh, yes, this is not the best breakfast I've ever had and I'd like my money back. Brad Hamilton:
Uh, okay, I believe you have to fill out a form for that. Businessman:
Uh, no, I'd like my money back now. Brad Hamilton:
I'm sorry, it doesn't work that way. You see, I have to fill out a form and-- [looks down at the half-eaten breakfast] Brad Hamilton:
--well, you ate most of it, already, so... Businessman:
[points at the 100% Guaranteed sign]
You see that sign? It says "100 % Guaranteed". You know what the meaning of "guarantee" is? Did they teach you that here? Brad Hamilton:
Sir, I... Businessman:
Look, just put your little hand back into the cash register and give me my two dollars and seventy-five cents back, please... [looks at Brad's name tag] Businessman:
... Brad. Brad Hamilton:
Sir, if you'd just give me a minute, I'll find the forms. I'll take care of everything. [gets down to search under the counter] Businessman:
I don't have a minute. You made me late enough. I am so tired of dealing with incompetence. [coming out of the restroom, Arnold hears the angry customer and goes back in] Businessman:
It says "100 % Guaranteed", you moron! Brad Hamilton:
[jumps up angrily]
MISTER, IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP, I'M GONNA KICK ONE HUNDERED PERCENT OF YOUR ASS! [hearing the commotion, Dennis immediately appears] Dennis Taylor:
Uh, is there a problem here? Can I help you, sir? Businessman:
You bet you have a problem. Your employee here threatened me with violence. I'm surprised. I eat here, all the time, and I usually get good service until today. All I wanted was money back on this breakfast. It was a little undercooked and he threatens me with violence. Now, I'm going to speak to your supervisor... Dennis Taylor:
[holds up a hand to stop him]
Uh, I can take care of this. Mr. Hamilton, Did you threaten this customer with violence or use profanity in any way? Brad Hamilton:
Well, he insulted me, first. He called me a moron, Dennis. Dennis Taylor:
Answer me! Did you threaten this customer with violence or use profanity in any way? Brad Hamilton:
Yes! Dennis Taylor:
You're fired. [to the customer, who smiles happily at Brad] Dennis Taylor:
I'm sorry, sir, I'll refund your money, right now. [Brad angrily takes off his hat and apron and storms towards the exit] Dennis Taylor:
Hope you won't hold this against us. You know how kids are, these days. Here we are. Perhaps another breakfast? Brad Hamilton:
[slams his hand on the men's restroom door]
I hope you had a hell of a piss, Arnold!
Full Transcript
00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.837
Is there a problem here Can I help you sir
00:00:03.092 --> 00:00:05.213
You bet you have a problem
00:00:05.296 --> 00:00:08.383
Your employee used profanity and threatened me with violence
00:00:08.466 --> 00:00:10.385
I'm surprised I eat here all the time
00:00:10.468 --> 00:00:12.512
and usually have good service
00:00:12.595 --> 00:00:15.014
All I wanted was my money back on this breakfast
00:00:15.223 --> 00:00:16.808
It was a little under cooked
00:00:16.891 --> 00:00:20.437
And he threatens me with violence I'm gonna call your
00:00:20.052 --> 00:00:22.439
I can take care of it
00:00:22.897 --> 00:00:27.036
Mr Hamilton did you threaten this customer or use profanity in any way
00:00:30.989 --> 00:00:33.783
He insulted me first He called me a moron Dennis
00:00:33.867 --> 00:00:37.062
Answer rne Did you threaten this customer or use profanity
00:00:38.163 --> 00:00:39.247
Yes
00:00:39.033 --> 00:00:40.749
You're fired
00:00:40.832 --> 00:00:44.127
I'm very sorry sir I'll refund your money right now
00:00:44.021 --> 00:00:45.879
I hope you won't hold this against us
00:00:45.962 --> 00:00:48.673
You know how these young kids are these days
00:00:48.084 --> 00:00:51.176
Here we are Perhaps another breakfast
00:00:51.384 --> 00:00:54.179
I hope you had a hell of a piss Arnold
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Movie Summary
Based on the real-life adventures chronicled by Cameron Crowe, Fast Times follows a group of high school students growing up in Southern California. Stacy Hamilton and Mark Ratner are looking for a love interest, and are helped along by their older classmates, Linda Barrett and Mike Damone, respectively. At the center of the film is Jeff Spicoli, a perpetually stoned surfer who faces-off with the resolute Mr. Hand—a man convinced that everyone is on dope.
