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So not only do I find out yesterday I'm adopted
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So not only yesterday do I find out I'm adopted. The people I've been calling "Mom" and...

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Nick Brady: [trying to talk his way out of football camp] So not only yesterday do I find out I'm adopted. The people I've been calling "Mom" and "Dad" are actually two infertile impostors who bought me outside of a meth clinic in Cincinatti for two boxes of Sudafed, but I also get this news dropped on me - my birth father, Bruce... well he needs a kidney and I'm the only match and apparently Bruce needs it "stat". Mmm-hmm. You need it stat, Bruce? Huh? Well maybe I needed a father stat instead of my stay-at-home dad who showers me with love everyday of his life, this goddamn spermless liar! [pause] Nick Brady: So now I have to be at Kaiser Permanente at 6 a.m. tomorrow. I know, Bruce couldn't even afford a real hospital... managed care. Ironic, isn't it? He never *managed* to care for me.


Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.063
So not only do I find out yesterday I'm adopted
00:00:03.008 --> 00:00:06.008
the people I've called mom and dad are infertile imposters
00:00:06.097 --> 00:00:10.007
who bought me outside a meth clinic for two boxes of Sudafed
00:00:10.024 --> 00:00:12.058
but I also get this news dropped on me
00:00:12.091 --> 00:00:15.044
My birth father Bruce
00:00:16.012 --> 00:00:18.098
well he needs a kidney and I'm the only match
00:00:19.019 --> 00:00:21.025
And apparently Bruce needs it stat
00:00:21.092 --> 00:00:24.039
You need it stat Bruce Huh
00:00:24.059 --> 00:00:27.032
I needed a father stat instead of the stay at home dad
00:00:27.049 --> 00:00:30.083
who showers me with love every day this goddamn spermless liar
00:00:32.027 --> 00:00:35.026
So now I gotta be at Kaiser Permanente tomorrow at 6 a m
00:00:35.047 --> 00:00:38.087
I know Bruce couldn't even afford a real hospital
00:00:39.007 --> 00:00:41.007
Managed care It's ironic huh
00:00:42.031 --> 00:00:44.999
Never managed to care for me

Clip duration: 45 seconds
Views: 161
Timestamp in movie: 00h 15m 54s
Uploaded: 02 December, 2022
Genres: comedy, sport
Summary: The two most popular guys in high school decide to ditch football camp for cheerleader camp. For the girls and for the glory.


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