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What do you mean

Bobby:
I'd like a plain omelette, no potatoes, tomatoes instead, a cup of coffee and wheat toast.
Waitress:
[points at his menu]
No substitutions.
Bobby:
What do you mean? You don't have any tomatoes?
Waitress:
Only what's on the menu. You can have a number two, a plain omelette, it comes with cottage fries and rolls.
Bobby:
Yeah, I know what it comes with, but it's not what I want.
Waitress:
Well, I'll come back when you make up your mind
Bobby:
Wait a minute, I have made up my mind. I'd like a plain omelette, no potatoes on the plate, a cup of coffee and a side order of wheat toast.
Waitress:
I'm sorry, we don't have any side orders of toast. I'll give you an English muffin or a coffee roll.
Bobby:
What do you mean you don't make side orders of toast? You make sandwiches, don't you?
Waitress:
Would you like to talk to the manager?
Palm Apodaca:
Hey, mac...
Bobby:
Shut up.
[to the waitress]

Bobby:
You've got bread and a toaster of some kind?
Waitress:
I don't make the rules.
Bobby:
OK, I'll make it as easy for you as I can. I'd like an omelette, plain, and a chicken salad sandwich on wheat toast, no mayonnaise, no butter, no lettuce, and a cup of coffee.
Waitress:
A number two, a chicken salad sand. Hold the butter, the lettuce, and the mayonnaise, and a cup of coffee. Anything else?
Bobby:
Yeah, now all you have to do is hold the chicken, bring me the toast, give me a cheque for the chicken salad sandwich, and you haven't broken any rules.
Waitress:
You want me to hold the chicken, huh?
Bobby:
I want you to hold it between your knees.
[Palm Apodaca sniggers]

Waitress:
[points at a sign behind her]
You see that sign, sir? Yes, you'll all have to leave! I'm not taking any more of your smartness and sarcasm!
Bobby:
You see this sign?
[he sweeps all the glasses off the table onto the floor]

Transcript:
I was collecting onto me
more garbage every day...
till I was getting to thinkin'
that I should get a disposal.
Disposal?
What's that but more crap?
I've never seen such crap.
- Mass production is what does it.
- What do you mean, mass?
I have to come out and tell you the truth.
You're not that clean either.
Wait a minute.
I'm not that neat maybe, but I am clean.
Well, you're not that bad.
But some people.
[Scoffs]
People's homes - just filth.
I've been in people's homes -
In my personal observation,
I think that more people are neat than are clean.
My personal thing, I don't see that.
I'm seeing more filth. A lot of filth.
What they need to do every day -
No, once in a while -
is do a cockroach thing,
you know, where they spray the homes.
Can you imagine if their doors were painted
a pretty color, and they had a pot outside?
- Yeah, could be adorable.
- And they picked up.
Then it wouldn't be filthy
with Coke bottles and whiskey and, uh -
Those signs everywhere -
they should be erased!
All those signs selling you crap
and more crap and more crap.
I - I don't know. I don't know.
I don't even want to talk about it.
- Well -
- It's just filthy! People are filthy.
I think that's the biggest thing
that's wrong with people.
I think they wouldn't be as violent
if they were clean...
because then they wouldn't
have anybody to pick on.
[Scoffs]
Dirt.
Not dirt. See, dirt isn't bad.
It's filth. Filth is bad.
That's what starts maggots and riots.
Hey, follow that truck.
They know the best places to stop.
That's an old maid's tale.
Bullshit!
Truck drivers are the only ones
that know the best places to stop on the road.
Salesmen and cops are the ones.
If you'd ever waitressed, honey, you'd know that.
- Don't call me honey, mack.
- Don't call me mack, honey.
I wouldn't be a waitress.
They're nasty and full of crap.
You just hold on to your tongue!
Hold on to this.
- [Laughing]
- If you think that you can talk to me like that -
Shut up! All of ya.
[Horn Honking]
I'd like a, uh, plain omelet,
no potatoes, tomatoes instead...
a cup of coffee and wheat toast.
No substitutions.
What do you mean?
You don't have any tomatoes?
Only what's on the menu.
You can have a number two, a plain omelet.
It comes with cottage fries and rolls.
I know what it comes with,
but it's not what I want.
- Well, I'll come back when you make up your mind.
- Wait a minute.
I have made up my mind.
I'd like a plain omelet.
No potatoes on the plate.
A cup of coffee and a side order of wheat toast.
I'm sorry, we don't have
any side orders of toast.
I'll give you an English muffin
or a coffee roll.
What do you mean you don't
make side orders of toast?
You make sandwiches, don't you?
- Would you like to talk to the manager?
- Hey, mack!
Shut up.
You've got bread and a toaster of some kind?
I don't make the rules.
Okay, I'll make it as easy for you as I can.
I'd like an omelet, plain...
and a chicken salad sandwich on wheat toast.
No mayonnaise, no butter, no lettuce,
and a cup of coffee.
A number two - chicken sal san...
hold the butter, the lettuce
and the mayonnaise.
And a cup of coffee. Anything else?
Yeah. Now all you have to do
is hold the chicken, bring me the toast...
give me a check for the chicken salad sandwich,
and you haven't broken any rules.
You want me to hold the chicken, huh?
I want you to hold it between your knees.
[Snickering]
You see that sign, sir?
Yes, you all have to leave. I'm not taking
any more of your smartness and sarcasm!
- You see this sign?
- [Gasps]
Fantastic that you could figure that all out
and lie that down on her...
so you could come up with
a way to get your toast.
- Fantastic!
- Yeah? Well, I didn't get it, did I?
No. But it was very clever.
I would have just punched her out.
People.
[Scoffs]
Animals are not like that. Mm-mmm.
They're always cleaning themselves.
Did you ever see, um...
pigeons?
Well, he's always picking
on himself and his friends.
They're always picking bugs
out of their hair all the time.
Monkeys too.
Except they do something
out in the open that I don't go for.

Clip duration: 258 seconds
Views: 15
Movie: Five Easy Pieces
Year: 1970
Genres: drama
Summary: A dropout from upper-class America picks up work along the way on oil rigs when his life isn't spent in a squalid succession of bars, motels, and other points of interest.


Watch Full Movie on Amazon

Actors

Waitress - Lorna Thayer
Palm Apodaca - Helena Kallianiotes