All I know is that I began to feel things again. Whatever I was, I knew there was only one...
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Valerie:
What would you have said to her?Susanna:I don't know. That I was sorry. That I will never know what it was like to be her. But I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. You hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside.Valerie:Susanna, it's all well and good to tell me all this, but you gotta tell some of this to your doctors.Susanna:How the hell am I supposed to recover when I don't even understand my disease?Valerie:But you do understand it. You spoke very clearly about it a second ago. But I think what you've gotta do is put it down. Put it away. Put it in your notebook, but get it out of yourself. Away so you can't curl up with it anymore.Susanna:Lisa thinks it's a gift. That it lets you see the truth.Valerie:Lisa's been here for eight years.Susanna: I'm so sorry. I was a bitch. I was a bitch.Valerie:Don't drop anchor here, you understand?Susanna: When you don't want to feel, death can seem like a dream. But seeing death, really seeing it, makes dreaming about it fucking ridiculous. Maybe, there's a moment growing up when something peels back... Maybe, maybe, we look for secrets because we can't believe our minds...Susanna:All I know is that I began to feel things again. Whatever I was, I knew there was only one way back to the world and that was to use the place to talk. So I saw the great and wonderful Dr. Wick three times a week, and I let her hear every thought in my head
What would you have said to her?Susanna:I don't know. That I was sorry. That I will never know what it was like to be her. But I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. You hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside.Valerie:Susanna, it's all well and good to tell me all this, but you gotta tell some of this to your doctors.Susanna:How the hell am I supposed to recover when I don't even understand my disease?Valerie:But you do understand it. You spoke very clearly about it a second ago. But I think what you've gotta do is put it down. Put it away. Put it in your notebook, but get it out of yourself. Away so you can't curl up with it anymore.Susanna:Lisa thinks it's a gift. That it lets you see the truth.Valerie:Lisa's been here for eight years.Susanna: I'm so sorry. I was a bitch. I was a bitch.Valerie:Don't drop anchor here, you understand?Susanna: When you don't want to feel, death can seem like a dream. But seeing death, really seeing it, makes dreaming about it fucking ridiculous. Maybe, there's a moment growing up when something peels back... Maybe, maybe, we look for secrets because we can't believe our minds...Susanna:All I know is that I began to feel things again. Whatever I was, I knew there was only one way back to the world and that was to use the place to talk. So I saw the great and wonderful Dr. Wick three times a week, and I let her hear every thought in my head
Full Transcript
00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.452
How you try to fit in but you can't
00:00:06.999 --> 00:00:09.291
How you hurt yourself on the outside
00:00:09.509 --> 00:00:12.795
to try to kill the thing on the inside
00:00:15.999 --> 00:00:19.884
Susanna it's all well and good to tell me all this
00:00:20.895 --> 00:00:24.478
But you've got to tell some of this to your doctors
00:00:30.822 --> 00:00:32.779
How am I supposed to recover
00:00:32.991 --> 00:00:35.861
when I don't even understand my disease
00:00:36.087 --> 00:00:39.242
But you do understand it
00:00:39.539 --> 00:00:43.998
You spoke very clearly about it a second ago
00:00:43.918 --> 00:00:47.001
But I think what you've got to do is put it down
00:00:47.338 --> 00:00:49.711
Put it away Put it in your notebook
00:00:49.924 --> 00:00:51.917
But get it out of yourself
00:00:52.635 --> 00:00:56.585
Away so you can't curl up with it anymore
00:01:03.521 --> 00:01:05.977
Lisa thinks it's a gift
00:01:08.777 --> 00:01:11.999
That it lets you see the truth
00:01:14.824 --> 00:01:17.315
Lisa's been here for eight years
00:01:25.877 --> 00:01:28.998
I'm so sorry
00:01:28.001 --> 00:01:31.631
I was a pig It's all right Listen
00:01:34.999 --> 00:01:36.999
Do not drop anchor here
00:01:37.999 --> 00:01:38.001
Understand
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When you don't want to feel
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death can seem like a dream
00:01:59.536 --> 00:02:02.001
But seeing death
00:02:02.914 --> 00:02:04.907
really seeing it
00:02:05.291 --> 00:02:09.001
makes dreaming about it fucking ridiculous
00:02:10.255 --> 00:02:14.001
Maybe there's a moment growing up
00:02:14.999 --> 00:02:16.001
when something peels back
00:02:16.886 --> 00:02:21.001
Maybe we look for secrets because we can't believe our minds
00:02:21.999 --> 00:02:25.001
Though I missed Lisa life was easier without her
00:02:25.001 --> 00:02:27.097
A thought is a hard thing to control
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All I know is that I began to feel again
00:02:32.999 --> 00:02:33.642
Crazy Sane
00:02:33.999 --> 00:02:38.524
Whatever I was I knew there was only one way back to the world
00:02:38.999 --> 00:02:41.233
and that was to use the place
00:02:41.494 --> 00:02:42.953
to talk
00:02:43.001 --> 00:02:47.577
So I saw the great and wonderful Dr Wick three times a week
00:02:47.792 --> 00:02:50.001
and I let her hear every thought in my head
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Movie Summary
Based on writer Susanna Kaysen's account of her 18-month stay at a mental hospital in the late 1960s.
Actors
Valerie
Susanna
