Log-in to add movie to favourites
Movie added to favourites
Movie removed from favourites

"Grumpy Old Men" quotes

Grumpy Old Men poster
A lifelong feud between two neighbors since childhood only gets worse when a new female neighbor moves across the street.

Director: Donald Petrie
Writer: Mark Steven Johnson
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy, drama, romance
Year: 1993
MetaScore: 53/100
ImdbRating: 7.0
BoxOffice: $70,172,621
Released: 25 Dec 1993
Awards: 1 win & 1 nomination

45 video clips

John GustafsonMax GoldmanGrandpa GustafsonSnyderAriel TruaxWeathermanChuckMelanie
Did you mount her - Grumpy Old Men 00:20 Did you mount her Looks like Chuck's taking old one eye to the optometrist - Grumpy Old Men 00:08 Looks like Chuck's taking old one eye to the... You're supposed to be smoking filter cigarettes - Grumpy Old Men 00:09 You're supposed to be smoking filter cigarettes I was married to the woman for 20 years - Grumpy Old Men 00:28 I was married to the woman for 20 years I've laid more pipe in this town than Wabasha Plumbing - Grumpy Old Men 00:09 I've laid more pipe in this town than Wabasha Plumbing Morning dickhead Hello moron - Grumpy Old Men 00:05 Morning dickhead Hello moron When I had my ulcers - Grumpy Old Men 00:14 When I had my ulcers I'm sure John started every fight since 1940 - Grumpy Old Men 00:10 I'm sure John started every fight since 1940 But I don't want to die looking at your ugly face - Grumpy Old Men 00:20 But I don't want to die looking at your ugly face Do the world a favor and pull your lip over your head and swallow - Grumpy Old Men 00:07 Do the world a favor and pull your lip over your head and... You mean the low life - Grumpy Old Men 00:34 You mean the low life You know what Jacob said - Grumpy Old Men 00:34 You know what Jacob said I hit the cans again - Grumpy Old Men 00:11 I hit the cans again And these two little guys - Grumpy Old Men 00:34 And these two little guys Your cat crapped on my steps again - Grumpy Old Men 00:11 Your cat crapped on my steps again I'd have asked for another million - Grumpy Old Men 00:12 I'd have asked for another million Pretty damn fast Yeah - Grumpy Old Men 00:08 Pretty damn fast Yeah Hey dickhead you win the lottery - Grumpy Old Men 00:10 Hey dickhead you win the lottery Who's the guy yakkin' at your door - Grumpy Old Men 00:18 Who's the guy yakkin' at your door Moron Putz - Grumpy Old Men 00:05 Moron Putz Gotta use hot water - Grumpy Old Men 00:06 Gotta use hot water Did you mount her Oh Dad - Grumpy Old Men 00:20 Did you mount her Oh Dad When was the last time you made love - Grumpy Old Men 00:28 When was the last time you made love Hey dickhead you win the lottery - Grumpy Old Men 00:06 Hey dickhead you win the lottery Cold enough for ya - Grumpy Old Men 00:10 Cold enough for ya Ohh you don't know a damn things about me - Grumpy Old Men 00:14 Ohh you don't know a damn things about me Gay or straight - Grumpy Old Men 00:22 Gay or straight Up yours Gustafson - Grumpy Old Men 00:05 Up yours Gustafson We did the horizontal mambo - Grumpy Old Men 00:06 We did the horizontal mambo She chose me She did - Grumpy Old Men 00:09 She chose me She did That's not just a woman living across your street - Grumpy Old Men 00:12 That's not just a woman living across your street It was an awakening - Grumpy Old Men 00:17 It was an awakening And then you begin to count the minutes rather than the days - Grumpy Old Men 00:40 And then you begin to count the minutes rather than the days Very interesting woman - Grumpy Old Men 00:17 Very interesting woman Can't live with them - Grumpy Old Men 00:06 Can't live with them Hey watch your mouth you dumb frigging Swede - Grumpy Old Men 00:06 Hey watch your mouth you dumb frigging Swede Hey Drop that fish - Grumpy Old Men 00:06 Hey Drop that fish All the ideas that you brought to those young minds - Grumpy Old Men 00:18 All the ideas that you brought to those young minds Damn kids - Grumpy Old Men 00:11 Damn kids Holy moly - Grumpy Old Men 00:07 Holy moly I have to talk to you - Grumpy Old Men 01:06 I have to talk to you CHUCK Ha ha Can I get you something - Grumpy Old Men 00:30 CHUCK Ha ha Can I get you something You know you can tell a lot about a person from his bathroom - Grumpy Old Men 00:19 You know you can tell a lot about a person from his bathroom Did you hear about Eddie Hicks - Grumpy Old Men 00:21 Did you hear about Eddie Hicks Like a damned catfish Well I've had a lot on my mind lately - Grumpy Old Men 00:13 Like a damned catfish Well I've had a lot on my mind...

Cast

John Gustafson - Jack Lemmon
Max Goldman - Walter Matthau
Ariel Truax - Ann-Margret
Grandpa Gustafson - Burgess Meredith
Melanie - Daryl Hannah
All Cast