One day about a month ago, I really hit bottom. Ya know I just felt that in a Godless...

Mickey: One day about a month ago, I really hit bottom. Ya know I just felt that in a Godless universe I didn't wanna go on living. Now I happen to own this rifle, which I loaded believe it or not, and pressed it to my forehead. And I remember thinking, I'm gonna kill myself. Then I thought, what if I'm wrong, what if there is a God. I mean, after all nobody really knows that. Then I thought no, ya know maybe is not good enough, I want certainty or nothing. And I remember very clearly, the clock was ticking, and I was sitting there frozen with the gun to my head, debating whether to shoot. [gun fires] Mickey: All of a sudden the gun went off. I had been so tense my finger squeezed the trigger inadvertantly. But I was perspiring so much the gun had slid off my forehead and missed me. Suddenly neighbors were pounding on the door, and I dunno the whole scene was just pandemonium. I ran to the door, I didn't know what to say. I was embarrassed and confused and my mind was racing a mile a minute. And I just knew one thing I had to get out of that house, I had to just get out in the fresh air and clear my head. I remember very clearly I walked the streets, I walked and I walked I didn't know what was going through my mind, it all seemed so violent and unreal to me. I wandered for a long time on the upper west side, it must have been hours. My feet hurt, my head was pounding, and I had to sit down I went into a movie house. I didn't know what was playing or anything I just needed a moment to gather my thoughts and be logical and put the world back into rational perspective. And I went upstairs to the balcony, and I sat down, and the movie was a film that I'd seen many times in my life since I was a kid, and I always loved it. I'm watching these people up on the screen and I started getting hooked on the film. I started to feel, how can you even think of killing yourself, I mean isn't it so stupid. Look at all the people up there on the screen, they're real funny, and what if the worst is true. What if there is no God and you only go around once and that's it. Well, ya know, don't you wanna be part of the experience? You know, what the hell it's not all a drag. And I'm thinking to myself, Jeez, I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts. And after who knows, I mean maybe there is something, nobody really knows. I know maybe is a very slim reed to hang your whole life on, but that's the best we have. And then I started to sit back, and I actually began to enjoy myself.

When I ran into you, you seemed just perfectly fine. You seem fine now. Well, I'll tell you. One clay, about a month ago, I really hit bottom. I just felt that in a Godless universe, I didn't want to go on living. Now, I happen to own this rifle, which I loaded and pressed to my forehead. And I remember thinking, "I'm gonna kill myself." Then I thought, "What if I'm wrong? "What if there is a God?" After all, nobody really knows that. But then I thought, "No, 'maybe' is not good enough. "I want certainty or nothing." And I remember very clearly the clock was ticking, and I was sitting there, frozen, with the gun to my head, debating whether to shoot.' (Gunshot) All of a sudden, the gun went off. I'd been so tense, my finger had squeezed the trigger inadvertently. But I was perspiring so much, the gun had slid off my forehead and missed me. - (Gunshot) - Neighbours were pounding on the door and, I don't know, the whole scene was just pandemonium. And I ran to the door, I didn't know what to say. I was embarrassed and confused. My mind was racing a mile a minute, and I just knew one thing. I had to get out of that house, I just had to get out in the fresh air and clear my head. And I remember very clearly I walked the streets. I didn't know what was going through my mind. It all seemed so violent and unreal to me. And I wandered for a long time on the Upper West Side. It must've been hours. My feet hurt and my head was pounding. I had to sit down. I went into a movie house. I didn't know what was playing. I just needed a moment to gather my thoughts and be logical and put the world back into rational perspective... And I went upstairs to the balcony and I sat down. And the movie was a film that I'd seen many times in my life since I was a kid, and I always loved it. And I'm watching these people up on the screen and I started getting hooked on the film. And I started to feel, "How can you even think of killing yourself? "Isn't that stupid? "Look at all the people up there on the screen. "They're real funny, and what if the worst is true? "What if there's no God and you only go around once and that's it? "Don't you want to be part of the experience? "What the hell? It's not all a drag." I'm thinking to myself, "Jeez, I should stop ruining my life, "searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts." And after, who knows? Maybe there is something. Nobody really knows. I know 'maybe' is a very slim reed to hang your whole life on, but it's the best we have. And then I started to sit back and I actually began to enjoy myself.' ♪ Oh, Freedonia, Oh, don't you cry for me ♪ Cos I'm coming round the mountain ♪ Erm... Look, there's something that's been bothering me for a long time. I just thought I'd tell you what it was and just sort of clear the deck here. I've always regretted the way I behaved that evening we went out. - I just thought I'd tell you that... - Don't be silly. Don't be ridiculous. I was the... You know, it was my fault. So you wanna go out to dinner again? Do you have any interest in that? - Sure. - Are you free this evening? Yeah, yeah. I want ice! Who's got some? Oh, there it is. Hey, where's Holly? She's late. Did you read that last thing Holly wrote? She's really developed. She really writes good dialogue. Hannah, can I tell everybody you're going to play Desdemona? - Mom, it's only television. - But it's public television. To me, Shakespeare doesn't get any greater than "Othello". - You with some big, black stud. I love it! - Oh, honey! (Elliot) Oh, Lee. You are something. You look very beautiful. Marriage agrees with you. Everything that happened between us seems more and more hazy. I acted like such a fool. I don't know what came over me. The complete conviction that I couldn't live without you. What I put us both through! And Hannah, who, as you once said, I love much more than I realised.' Hi! Happy Thanksgiving! - Hi, Daisy. I didn't miss dinner, did I? - No. Hi, Marge. Happy Thanksgiving! Happy Thanksgiving, Amy. (♪ ROGERS & HART: "isn't It Romantic") It's beautiful. - Don't be nervous. It's your husband. - Hi. - Hi. How are you doing? - OK. - When did you get here? - Just a few minutes ago. - You look so beautiful. - Thanks. I was talking to your father before. I was telling him that it's ironic. I used to always have Thanksgiving with Hannah. I never thought that I could love anybody else. And here it is, years later, and I'm married to you and completely in love with you. The heart is a very, very resilient little muscle. It'd make a great story, I think. A guy marries one sister and it doesn't work out. Then, years later, he winds up married to the other sister. How you're gonna top that? - Mickey? - What? I'm pregnant.