"Happy Gilmore" quotes

Happy Gilmore poster
A rejected hockey player puts his skills to the golf course to save his grandmother's house.

Director: Dennis Dugan
Writer: Tim Herlihy, Adam Sandler
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy, sport
Year: 1996
MetaScore: 31/100
ImdbRating: 7.0
BoxOffice: $38,824,099
Released: 16 Feb 1996
Awards: 1 win & 4 nominations

89 Clips

Hey Gilmore - Happy Gilmore 00:08 Hey Gilmore There you are - Happy Gilmore 00:59 There you are I'll make you a bet - Happy Gilmore 00:46 I'll make you a bet Must be something in the water Well time to play golf - Happy Gilmore 00:05 Must be something in the water Well time to play golf Mr Gilmore you're up - Happy Gilmore 00:55 Mr Gilmore you're up You're gonna make friends in no time - Happy Gilmore 00:10 You're gonna make friends in no time See if you can out drive the amazing Golf Ball - Happy Gilmore 00:09 See if you can out drive the amazing Golf Ball A guy your size - Happy Gilmore 00:11 A guy your size How nice to meet you - Happy Gilmore 00:09 How nice to meet you Happy Gilmore is in trouble if he can't hit the long ball - Happy Gilmore 00:06 Happy Gilmore is in trouble if he can't hit the long ball Who are you waving at - Happy Gilmore 00:05 Who are you waving at Nice to meet you - Happy Gilmore 00:03 Nice to meet you What are you doing Happy - Happy Gilmore 00:07 What are you doing Happy Nice shooting soldier - Happy Gilmore 00:04 Nice shooting soldier Incredible Happy Gilmore wins the gold jacket - Happy Gilmore 00:49 Incredible Happy Gilmore wins the gold jacket Remember the 'gator that got your hand - Happy Gilmore 00:06 Remember the 'gator that got your hand This guy sucks - Happy Gilmore 00:04 This guy sucks Don't feel bad about me - Happy Gilmore 00:08 Don't feel bad about me Happy look out - Happy Gilmore 00:15 Happy look out Great to hear from you - Happy Gilmore 00:07 Great to hear from you Happy Gilmore come on down - Happy Gilmore 00:04 Happy Gilmore come on down You like being the favorite - Happy Gilmore 00:03 You like being the favorite The real favorite is Portland Every time I visit it's harder to leave - Happy Gilmore 00:09 The real favorite is Portland Every time I visit it's harder... Stop fraternizing with the help Gilmore - Happy Gilmore 00:08 Stop fraternizing with the help Gilmore Quite a large and economically diverse crowd here at the Michelob Invitational - Happy Gilmore 00:15 Quite a large and economically diverse crowd here at the... Whoa must be Burt Reynolds or something - Happy Gilmore 00:05 Whoa must be Burt Reynolds or something Golf is no different requires talent self discipline - Happy Gilmore 00:34 Golf is no different requires talent self discipline You're a hockey player - Happy Gilmore 00:07 You're a hockey player He had Happy written on his ass - Happy Gilmore 00:40 He had Happy written on his ass We've only just begun - Happy Gilmore 00:07 We've only just begun God that hurt but I'm okay - Happy Gilmore 00:04 God that hurt but I'm okay It's about time - Happy Gilmore 00:08 It's about time He's going to be on the Tour Super - Happy Gilmore 00:10 He's going to be on the Tour Super Is that goal regulation size or what - Happy Gilmore 00:05 Is that goal regulation size or what You will not make this putt - Happy Gilmore 00:05 You will not make this putt That Son of a Bitch - Happy Gilmore 00:25 That Son of a Bitch Feelin' the flow - Happy Gilmore 00:06 Feelin' the flow I burn the house down and piss on the ashes - Happy Gilmore 00:12 I burn the house down and piss on the ashes Damn you people This is golf not a rock concert - Happy Gilmore 00:06 Damn you people This is golf not a rock concert What's going on here - Happy Gilmore 00:25 What's going on here The gold jacket's yours - Happy Gilmore 00:05 The gold jacket's yours Thanks for dressing up - Happy Gilmore 00:09 Thanks for dressing up You no want breakfast - Happy Gilmore 00:04 You no want breakfast It's all in the hips - Happy Gilmore 00:15 It's all in the hips What do you think - Happy Gilmore 00:13 What do you think Get this off of me - Happy Gilmore 00:11 Get this off of me You know what's pathetic You've been playing golf all your life - Happy Gilmore 00:06 You know what's pathetic You've been playing golf all your... Haven't you forgot your nine iron - Happy Gilmore 00:06 Haven't you forgot your nine iron I saw Doug playing yesterday - Happy Gilmore 00:09 I saw Doug playing yesterday Get me outta here - Happy Gilmore 00:12 Get me outta here That was so much easier than putting - Happy Gilmore 00:30 That was so much easier than putting Let me just enjoy the one thing that makes me a little bit happy - Happy Gilmore 00:29 Let me just enjoy the one thing that makes me a little bit... I believe that's Mr - Happy Gilmore 00:04 I believe that's Mr Damn you people - Happy Gilmore 00:05 Damn you people Cause you're never gonna get off that beach - Happy Gilmore 00:11 Cause you're never gonna get off that beach Don't you ever touch my puck - Happy Gilmore 00:08 Don't you ever touch my puck What are you doing - Happy Gilmore 00:08 What are you doing I'm sorry about that - Happy Gilmore 00:43 I'm sorry about that Sports Illustrated said I was going to be the next Arnold Palmer - Happy Gilmore 00:34 Sports Illustrated said I was going to be the next Arnold... I thought we were going to be just friends - Happy Gilmore 00:09 I thought we were going to be just friends Can I trouble you for a glass of warm milk - Happy Gilmore 00:18 Can I trouble you for a glass of warm milk My girlfriend is dead - Happy Gilmore 00:06 My girlfriend is dead I bet 20 you can't do it again - Happy Gilmore 00:44 I bet 20 you can't do it again You want to beat him Beat him on the course - Happy Gilmore 00:13 You want to beat him Beat him on the course I'd love to punch that guy in the face right now - Happy Gilmore 00:14 I'd love to punch that guy in the face right now What a shot by Happy Gilmore - Happy Gilmore 00:07 What a shot by Happy Gilmore You're the best - Happy Gilmore 00:14 You're the best You're gonna die - Happy Gilmore 00:04 You're gonna die That guy's driving me  crazy - Happy Gilmore 01:11 That guy's driving me crazy Trying to reach the green from here - Happy Gilmore 00:15 Trying to reach the green from here You like that old man You want a piece of me - Happy Gilmore 00:09 You like that old man You want a piece of me Just keep off your feet for a few days - Happy Gilmore 00:11 Just keep off your feet for a few days Happy learned how to putt - Happy Gilmore 00:06 Happy learned how to putt Somebody's closer - Happy Gilmore 00:05 Somebody's closer I didn't  break  it - Happy Gilmore 00:15 I didn't break it That's two thus far - Happy Gilmore 00:11 That's two thus far How's that nice girlfriend of yours - Happy Gilmore 00:06 How's that nice girlfriend of yours Just stay out of my way - Happy Gilmore 00:14 Just stay out of my way Block out the bad - Happy Gilmore 00:28 Block out the bad My fingers hurt - Happy Gilmore 00:23 My fingers hurt That's your HOME - Happy Gilmore 00:09 That's your HOME I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast - Happy Gilmore 00:08 I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast But she's an old lady - Happy Gilmore 00:27 But she's an old lady Is that Gilmore again - Happy Gilmore 00:39 Is that Gilmore again This is a biggie - Happy Gilmore 00:37 This is a biggie This guy spends more time in the sand than David Hasselhoff - Happy Gilmore 00:30 This guy spends more time in the sand than David Hasselhoff Kicking your ass - Happy Gilmore 01:07 Kicking your ass All you ever talk about is becoming a pro hockey player - Happy Gilmore 00:46 All you ever talk about is becoming a pro hockey player Let's play some golf - Happy Gilmore 00:41 Let's play some golf

Cast

Happy Gilmore - Adam Sandler
Shooter McGavin - Christopher McDonald
Virginia Venit - Julie Bowen
Grandma - Frances Bay
Chubbs - Carl Weathers
IRS Agent - Robert Smigel
Bob Barker - Bob Barker
Mr. Larson - Richard Kiel
Doug Thompson - Dennis Dugan
Jeering Fan - Joe Flaherty
Potter - Kevin Nealon
Announcer - Verne Lundquist
Happy's Waterbury Caddy - Jared Van Snellenberg
Assistant Coach - Rich Elwood
Terry - Nancy Hillis
Chinese Lady - Helena Yea
Mover - Will Sasso
Registrar - Ellie Harvie
Guy on Green - Ian Boothby
Crowd Guy - Waterbury - Andrew Johnston
Crowd Girl - Waterbury - Kim Restell
Waterbury Heckler - Fred Perron
Crazy Old Lady - Helen Honeywell
Starter #1 - Waterbury - Paul Raskin
Starter #2 - AT&T - William Samples
Daniel Lafferty - John Shaw
Auctioneer - Ted Deekan
Zamboni Driver - John Destry
Shooter's AT&T Caddy - James Crescenzo
Shooter's Tournament Caddy - Brett Armstrong
Potter's Caddy - Peter Kelamis
Pro Golfer - Stephen Tibbetts
Pro Golfer - Ed Lieberman
Young Happy - Donnie MacMillan
Happy's Dad - Louis O'Donoghue
Happy's Mom - Lisanne Collett
Italian Guy - Stephen Dimopoulos
Starter #4 - Pro-Am - Douglas Newell
Blue Collar Fan - Frank L. Frazier
Reporter - David Kaye
Batting Kid - Zachary Webb
Doctor - Simon Webb
Mark Lye - Mark Lye
Elderly Woman - Betty Linde
Reporter #2 - Dave Cameron
Reporter #3 - Louis Kliman
Official - Brent Chapman
Signed Chest Woman - Jessica Gunn
Cowboy Joe - Phillip Beer
Jack Beard - Fat Jack
Babe on Green - Michelle Holdsworth
Abe Lincoln - Charles L. Brame
Valerie - Valarie Trapp
Golf Fan - Mark Falvo
Sportscaster - Jack Giarraputo
Golf Fan - Adam Khedheri
Shirtless 'H' Fan - Michael Roberds
Player at Hockey Tryouts - Joe Sakic
Hal L. - Orderly in Nursing Home - Ben Stiller
Golf Fan - Heath Young