Fine day, Sunday. In my opinion, best day of the week. Why is that, Dudley? Because...

Uncle Vernon: [the Dursleys are sitting in the lounge, peacefully. It is Sunday and no letters have arrived] Fine day, Sunday. In my opinion, best day of the week. [turns to Dudley] Uncle Vernon: Why is that, Dudley? [Dudley shrugs] Harry: [Harry serves the Dursleys biscuits on a platter] Because there's no post on Sundays? Uncle Vernon: Right you are, Harry! [Vernon takes a biscuit from the platter that Harry served them] Uncle Vernon: No post on Sundays. Ha! [Harry stares out to see a parliament of owls outside Privet Drive] Uncle Vernon: No blasted letters *today*! No, sir! Not one single bloody letter! Not *one*! [the owls hoot outside the window] Uncle Vernon: No sir! Not one blasted, miserable - [a letter whizzes toward Vernon and hits him in the face. The Dursleys and Harry hear a rumble and a whole lot of letters shoot through the fireplace. The Dursleys scream as the letters shoot toward them, as Harry tries to catch one. Harry has a letter in his hand and Vernon chases after him] Uncle Vernon: Give me that! Give me that letter! [Harry runs to his room underneath the staircase and Vernon grabs him, trying to get the letter] Harry: [getting grabbed by Vernon] Get off! [Petunia screams as more letters shoot toward her and Vernon screams as the letters topple him, whilst still grabbing Harry] Harry: They're *my* letters! Let go of me! [even more letters shoot through the mailbox] Uncle Vernon: [Vernon has had enough of the letters and starts yelling] THAT'S IT! WE'RE GOING AWAY! FAR AWAY! WHERE THEY CAN'T FIND US! Dudley Dursley: [to Petunia] Daddy's gone mad, hasn't he? [Petunia looks at Vernon in shock]

In my opinion, best day of the week. Why is that, Dudley? - Because there's no post on Sundays? - Right you are, Harry! No post on Sunday. VERNON: No blasted letters today! No, sir. Not one single bloody letter. Not one! No, sir, not one blasted, miserable- DUDLEY: Make it stop, please! VERNON: Stop it!