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Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King

"Brunettes? Not for me." I'm like, "You work at Subway.You don't deserve so much choice."...

"Brunettes? Not for me." I'm like, "You work at Subway.
You don't deserve so much choice." We're getting soft

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.668
"Brunettes? Not for me."
00:00:02.752 --> 00:00:05.922
I'm like, "You work at Subway. You don't deserve so much choice."
00:00:06.999 --> 00:00:07.715
We're getting soft.
Duration
9 seconds
Views
17
Timestamp in Movie
00:01:50
Uploaded
Oct 30, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

In his first stand-up special, Hasan Minhaj weaves humorous and heartbreaking anecdotes to tell his life story as an Indian-American Muslim. Topics include racism, bullying and meeting the demanding expectations of his immigrant p...
You realize my parents physically never saw each other? - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:06
You realize my parents physically never saw each other?
Thirty years ago in a town in India, population 990,000 - - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:11
Thirty years ago in a town in India, population 990,000 -
And, like, Seema was that chick, you guys. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:05
And, like, Seema was that chick, you guys.
"Have you heard of Seema? She's slim. Her family owns a camera." - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:11
"Have you heard of Seema? She's slim. Her family o...
"I'm going to America. I want to marry Seema. YOLO." - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:10
"I'm going to America. I want to marry Seema. YOLO...
I want that for the rest of my life - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:10
I want that for the rest of my life
Let's move to the US where we're the only people that know each other." - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:09
Let's move to the US where we're the only people t...
Najmi marries Question Mark, they come to the States, I come out. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:06
Najmi marries Question Mark, they come to the States, I come...
Popping out of your mom is like real estate. It's all about location. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:06
Popping out of your mom is like real estate. It's all a...
I popped out here. Anybody brown, we popped out here, we made it. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:05
I popped out here. Anybody brown, we popped out here, we mad...
What's wild is, I never even knew how the whole X-Men Origins story went down. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:07
What's wild is, I never even knew how the whole X-Men O...
It's crazy, because we know nothing about our parents - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:07
It's crazy, because we know nothing about our parents
"Dad, your favorite color?" "Stanford!" - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:16
"Dad, your favorite color?" "Stanford!"
They love bottling them up deep down, - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:08
They love bottling them up deep down,
"Mom's a ninja, Dad's a communist? Why are you telling me this right now?" - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:11
"Mom's a ninja, Dad's a communist? Why are yo...
"That's the ending?" - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:13
"That's the ending?"
In the photo he's like, "You had better get all As." - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:09
In the photo he's like, "You had better get all As...
I grew up here. Like, Pioneer... I grew up here. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:06
I grew up here. Like, Pioneer... I grew up here.
But Davis was like super white - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:07
But Davis was like super white
Roll call was a problem. It was a big deal for a lot of us. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:05
Roll call was a problem. It was a big deal for a lot of us.