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Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King

"No one is going to marry him

"No one is going to marry him

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.254
"No one is going to marry him.
Duration
5 seconds
Views
19
Timestamp in Movie
00:24:01
Uploaded
Oct 30, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

In his first stand-up special, Hasan Minhaj weaves humorous and heartbreaking anecdotes to tell his life story as an Indian-American Muslim. Topics include racism, bullying and meeting the demanding expectations of his immigrant p...
Get him married before she changes her mind." - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:08
Get him married before she changes her mind."
She Phil Jacksoned that situation. She got all these people working together. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:06
She Phil Jacksoned that situation. She got all these people ...
For years I resented that brown girl. I hated her. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:05
For years I resented that brown girl. I hated her.
But on that day, on that special day, - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:08
But on that day, on that special day,
You know, they say - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:08
You know, they say
Every generation is defined by a great struggle or tragedy - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:18
Every generation is defined by a great struggle or tragedy
They won't get it, dude. You'll never get it. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:05
They won't get it, dude. You'll never get it.
You don't get it, man. You won't. That was our World War I, man. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:06
You don't get it, man. You won't. That was our Wor...
Especially in middle school, if a girl called the house, - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:08
Especially in middle school, if a girl called the house,
We used to have landlines. It's like phones connected to the land. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:07
We used to have landlines. It's like phones connected t...
And one time in middle school a girl called the house. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:05
And one time in middle school a girl called the house.
My dad picked it up before me - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:34
My dad picked it up before me
Ages zero through 30, "No girls!" At 35, "Why can't you talk to girls?" - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:13
Ages zero through 30, "No girls!" At 35, "Why...
Our parents are like a firewall to the outside world. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:06
Our parents are like a firewall to the outside world.
They disseminate information to us. It's like living in North Korea. - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:06
They disseminate information to us. It's like living in...
He's like, "Hasan, whatever you do, - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:14
He's like, "Hasan, whatever you do,
I hear a voice. "Hey, you sand nigger, where's Osama?" - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:08
I hear a voice. "Hey, you sand nigger, where's Osa...
"You can hear me, right? You fucking dune coon. Where's Osama?" - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:06
"You can hear me, right? You fucking dune coon. Where&#...
"Hey, 2631 Regatta Lane, that's where you live, right? - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:05
"Hey, 2631 Regatta Lane, that's where you live, ri...
Do you ever see your parents, and you see the mortality in them? - Hasan Minhaj: Homecoming King 00:07
Do you ever see your parents, and you see the mortality in t...