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"How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life" quotes

How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life poster
When a carefree bachelor tries to get his best friend to drop his mistress and return to his wife, he finds himself with romantic problems as well.

Director: Fielder Cook
Writer: Stanley Shapiro, Nate Monaster
Production: N/A
Genre: comedy, romance
Year: 1968
MetaScore: N/A/100
ImdbRating: 6.3
BoxOffice: N/A
Released: 29 Jan 1968
Awards: N/A

130 video clips

David SloaneMary HunterEddie RankinThelmaHarry HunterEverett BauerCarol CormanMarcia BorieRogerMuriel LaszloMr. SlotkinHall SatlerWally Hammond
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I'll never ruin another woman unless - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 I'll never ruin another woman unless Heaven knows I've tried to be a good wife - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:31 Heaven knows I've tried to be a good wife A bachelor's conscience is a woman's best friend - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:05 A bachelor's conscience is a woman's best friend The only nice thing you can say about men is they're all the same - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 The only nice thing you can say about men is they're... Harry Yes - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:10 Harry Yes But there is an opening in merchandising - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:14 But there is an opening in merchandising You find my touch repugnant - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:09 You find my touch repugnant Mr Hunter nice man - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:18 Mr Hunter nice man Miss Corman goodbye - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:11 Miss Corman goodbye Squashing one bug is not the answer to pest control - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:07 Squashing one bug is not the answer to pest control You know every day hundreds of you out of town Cinderellas - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:15 You know every day hundreds of you out of town Cinderellas Tommy I promised the customer - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:14 Tommy I promised the customer Now that we've established my guilt I think you will concede - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:30 Now that we've established my guilt I think you will... Oh ask him Harry's never been a liar - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:21 Oh ask him Harry's never been a liar Pardon me Yes - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:07 Pardon me Yes I hope Lester's mother's better - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:08 I hope Lester's mother's better Aren't you shocked - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 Aren't you shocked Why is it the only time a wife knows how you feel - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:07 Why is it the only time a wife knows how you feel That there's a war going on out there in the suburbs - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:13 That there's a war going on out there in the suburbs When your marriage isn't going well - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:08 When your marriage isn't going well Somehow the meatloaf is never cold - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 Somehow the meatloaf is never cold You're like one of the family - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:09 You're like one of the family Roger I don't love you - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:48 Roger I don't love you Every time you have something unpleasant to say - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 Every time you have something unpleasant to say How do you describe a saint - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:10 How do you describe a saint Have you any plans for tonight - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:07 Have you any plans for tonight Oh honesty is just something you grow up with - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:05 Oh honesty is just something you grow up with My father always said Plant a cabbage grow a cabbage - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 My father always said Plant a cabbage grow a cabbage Now if you can get by that mental block - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:05 Now if you can get by that mental block Honest loyal - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:18 Honest loyal Visit the shrine so you can throw away your crutches of disbelief - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:07 Visit the shrine so you can throw away your crutches of... When he comes home at night and he's quiet and you ask him what's wrong - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:27 When he comes home at night and he's quiet and you ask... My name is David Sloane and well - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:21 My name is David Sloane and well CAROL Such a rare combination - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:15 CAROL Such a rare combination I have a friend who's in trouble He doesn't know it - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:14 I have a friend who's in trouble He doesn't know... Mary's mother gave that to me as a present She trained it - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:23 Mary's mother gave that to me as a present She trained... Dragged out in the middle of the night to hear the ravings of a madman - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 Dragged out in the middle of the night to hear the ravings... I'd turn that dog loose on you if I wasn't afraid he'd tear me apart - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 I'd turn that dog loose on you if I wasn't afraid... Don't ever try selling four button Italian suits - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 Don't ever try selling four button Italian suits You know if Lewis and Clark had carried a line of men's clothing - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:07 You know if Lewis and Clark had carried a line of men's... I just hope I don't end up in an old salesman's home - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:08 I just hope I don't end up in an old salesman's... Well thank you Bread and salt - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:10 Well thank you Bread and salt Sloane I'm ashamed to dignify this evil lie with a phone call - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:12 Sloane I'm ashamed to dignify this evil lie with a... David only a cruel sadistic mind could think of that - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:10 David only a cruel sadistic mind could think of that He's an animal - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:07 He's an animal For two days I rode in a refrigerated boxcar with a load of broccoli - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:08 For two days I rode in a refrigerated boxcar with a load of... You don't just set people adrift on an ice floe - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 You don't just set people adrift on an ice floe This is anarchy socialism creeping Trotskyism - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:14 This is anarchy socialism creeping Trotskyism Hey when are you ever going to learn Harry - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:27 Hey when are you ever going to learn Harry If we only knew what turned decent people into Harry Hunters - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:14 If we only knew what turned decent people into Harry Hunters There is one type of woman that's very popular with men - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:38 There is one type of woman that's very popular with men It's strange - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:25 It's strange Muriel - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:19 Muriel Can I have a baby - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:03 Can I have a baby The twisted perverted mind that would make up a story like that - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 The twisted perverted mind that would make up a story like... Somewhere in this neighborhood - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:09 Somewhere in this neighborhood I'll go to see the chief psychiatrist - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:15 I'll go to see the chief psychiatrist STUTTERS Edna you keep away from me - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:18 STUTTERS Edna you keep away from me He gave me till sundown - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:18 He gave me till sundown I think a very good friend of mine is making a serious mistake - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:11 I think a very good friend of mine is making a serious... Yeah You're successful you're charming in a sneaky way - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:04 Yeah You're successful you're charming in a sneaky... I'm up very late - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:19 I'm up very late When I mentioned marriage to you - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:12 When I mentioned marriage to you I saw a picture last night - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:21 I saw a picture last night No no Don't give her the satisfaction of anger - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:38 No no Don't give her the satisfaction of anger Oh I see that's good that's good - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:10 Oh I see that's good that's good It was my great grandmother's - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:31 It was my great grandmother's A man You were with a man - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:50 A man You were with a man Maybe the first night she uses the ultimate weapon - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:47 Maybe the first night she uses the ultimate weapon The executive who says nothing is known for his wisdom - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:06 The executive who says nothing is known for his wisdom Miss Corman - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:23 Miss Corman You have a sharp tongue Miss Corman - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:11 You have a sharp tongue Miss Corman Yes Miss Corman has had a remarkable career - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:26 Yes Miss Corman has had a remarkable career Mr Slotkin why didn't you ever remarry - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:18 Mr Slotkin why didn't you ever remarry From the beginning you've been determined to vilify this innocent girl - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:21 From the beginning you've been determined to vilify... When I figure that out I'm going to try to remember it - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:07 When I figure that out I'm going to try to remember it Harry's not the mistress type - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:11 Harry's not the mistress type Miss And who opened the door - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:18 Miss And who opened the door I've always prided myself on my ability - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:26 I've always prided myself on my ability He stays away two nights a week - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:24 He stays away two nights a week Oh honey put away the fairy tale - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:09 Oh honey put away the fairy tale Oh I wish he'd say something - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:07 Oh I wish he'd say something We never kissed - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:16 We never kissed The first night that you walked into French class I said - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:11 The first night that you walked into French class I said Rome The firm's setting up a branch - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:10 Rome The firm's setting up a branch All right This girl that lights your cigar - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:10 All right This girl that lights your cigar The nights you don't go to see her - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:33 The nights you don't go to see her Sloane you're cynical - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:09 Sloane you're cynical Taxi Oh David - How to Save a Marriage and Ruin Your Life 00:17 Taxi Oh David
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Cast

David Sloane - Dean Martin
Carol Corman - Stella Stevens
Harry Hunter - Eli Wallach
Muriel Laszlo - Anne Jackson
Thelma - Betty Field
All Cast