Good morning, Mr Blake. My name's Amanda. I've got a couple of questions here for you...

[first lines] Amanda the Health Care Professional: Good morning, Mr Blake. My name's Amanda. I've got a couple of questions here for you today to establish your eligibility for Employment Support Allowance. It won't take up much of your time. Could I just ask firstly, can you walk more than 50 metres unassisted by any other person? Daniel: Yes. Amanda the Health Care Professional: Okay... Can you raise either arm as if to put something in your top pocket? Daniel: I've filled this in already on your 52-page form. Amanda the Health Care Professional: Yeah, I can see that you have but, unfortunately, I couldn't make out what you had said there. Daniel: Yes. Amanda the Health Care Professional: Can you raise either arm to the top of your head as if you are putting on a hat? Daniel: I've telt you, there's nowt wrong with me arms and legs. Amanda the Health Care Professional: Could you just answer the question, please. Daniel: Well, you've got me medical records... Can we just talk about me heart? Amanda the Health Care Professional: D'you think you could just answer these questions? Daniel: Okay. Amanda the Health Care Professional: So was that a yes, that you can put a hat on your head? Daniel: Yes. Amanda the Health Care Professional: Okay, that's great... Can you press a button such as a telephone keypad? Daniel: There's nowt wrong with me fingers either... I mean, we're getting farther and farther away from me heart. Amanda the Health Care Professional: If we could just keep to these questions, thank you... Do you have any significant difficulty conveying a simple message to strangers? Daniel: Yes. Yes, it's me fucking heart. I'm trying to tell you but you'll not listen. Amanda the Health Care Professional: Mr Blake, if you continue to speak to us like that that's not gonna be very helpful for your assessment... If you could just answer the question, please. Daniel: Yes. Amanda the Health Care Professional: Okay... Do you ever experience any loss of control leading to extensive evacuation of the bowel? Daniel: No. But I cannot guarantee there won't be a first if we didn't get to the point. Amanda the Health Care Professional: Can you complete a simple task of setting an alarm clock? Daniel: Oh, Jesus. Yes... Can I ask you a question? Are you medically qualified? Amanda the Health Care Professional: I'm a health care professional appointed by the Department of Work and Pensions to carry out assessments for Employment and Support Allowance. Daniel: But there was a bloke out in the, er, in the waiting room, he says that you work for an American company. Amanda the Health Care Professional: Our company's been appointed by the Government. Daniel: Are you a nurse? Are you a doctor? Amanda the Health Care Professional: I'm a health care professional. Daniel: Listen, I've had a major heart attack. I nearly fell off the scaffolding. I wanna get back to work, too... Now, please, can we talk about me heart? Forget about me arse, that works a dream.