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Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Iliza Shlesinger talks about different topics. She starts from every girl's ugly bra to how all adult men need to own a box spring.

Director

Steve Paley

Year

Genre

documentary, comedy

Box Office

N/A

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N/A

Awards

N/A

Self

Iliza Shlesinger

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I could be walking with a girlfriend,
and one of you walk by, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

I could be walking with a girlfriend, and one of you walk by...

There is an anger toward women
in our world, in our country. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

There is an anger toward women in our world, in our country.

Lucky for me, hating women is evergreen
and so these jokes still work. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Lucky for me, hating women is evergreen and so these jokes s...

But there is an anger toward women
when they don't give attention, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

But there is an anger toward women when they don't give...

Now is the portion where I bring it down
in order to bring it back up, here we go. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Now is the portion where I bring it down in order to bring i...

I know, it is hard to keep them
straight, America, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

I know, it is hard to keep them straight, America,

That guy that shot up
that Asian strip mall in Atlanta, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

That guy that shot up that Asian strip mall in Atlanta,

So now this next part,
I'm going to be as clear as possible, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

So now this next part, I'm going to be as clear as poss...

Gentlemen, if you are not having sex, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Gentlemen, if you are not having sex,

And the narrative of your life - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

And the narrative of your life

That is nature's way of saying
you should not be having sex, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

That is nature's way of saying you should not be having...

And I understand,
women cheer for that, most men do. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

And I understand, women cheer for that, most men do.

And you don't know,
"I don't wanna cheer for that." - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

And you don't know, "I don't wanna cheer for ...

Leave the diseased portion
of your herd that is broken. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Leave the diseased portion of your herd that is broken.

Come with us for snacks
and sex and good-looking babies. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Come with us for snacks and sex and good-looking babies.

It might make you more comfortable
to note that I stole that idea from a man - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

It might make you more comfortable to note that I stole that...

Because here's the truth, boys,
it is so easy to get a girl. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Because here's the truth, boys, it is so easy to get a ...

This is where I lose the women.
You were on my side, "We're outta here." - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

This is where I lose the women. You were on my side, "W...

By virtue of the fact that there are
more women than men on this planet, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

By virtue of the fact that there are more women than men on ...

The fact that women are brainwashed
into thinking that we lose value - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

The fact that women are brainwashed into thinking that we lo...

And I know, I'm supposed
to stand here and be like, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

And I know, I'm supposed to stand here and be like,

"All women are She-Diva
power bitches, that's right." - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

"All women are She-Diva power bitches, that's righ...

And, boys, get you an armadillo. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

And, boys, get you an armadillo.

You get you a fully loaded armadilly
with a CD changer and everything. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You get you a fully loaded armadilly with a CD changer and e...

I'm afraid that when I say that,
I'm gonna see that back door open - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

I'm afraid that when I say that, I'm gonna see tha...

It is so easy to get a girl, gentlemen.
All you got to do is show up. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

It is so easy to get a girl, gentlemen. All you got to do is...

"I love model trains." - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

"I love model trains."

You know what?
Even fishing, someone will take you. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You know what? Even fishing, someone will take you.

Some woman will be like, "I'll take him.
So, is that a wide-mouth you caught?" - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Some woman will be like, "I'll take him. So, is th...

You could be rich, obviously,
good-looking, good at math. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You could be rich, obviously, good-looking, good at math.

You could be nice.
Turns out that's attractive. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You could be nice. Turns out that's attractive.

I know, men don't...
"I don't want to be nice, I'm Rambo!" - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

I know, men don't... "I don't want to be nice...

You can be shy, that's kind of cute.
You can be nerdy. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You can be shy, that's kind of cute. You can be nerdy.

"I will roll
the eight-sided die with thee." - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

"I will roll the eight-sided die with thee."

Honestly, sometimes
you could just be tall. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Honestly, sometimes you could just be tall.

All the 5'10" guys are like, "Fuck you,
motherfucker, you could be tall." - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

All the 5'10" guys are like, "Fuck you, mothe...

You see the way girls' eyes light up?
"Tell us about your boyfriend." - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You see the way girls' eyes light up? "Tell us abo...

"Stop it." - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

I'm not even talking like David Blaine,
multimillionaire Vegas magician. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

I'm not even talking like David Blaine, multimillionair...

He's got a girl waiting in his Ultima
in the parking lot. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

He's got a girl waiting in his Ultima in the parking lo...

"That's my baby!" - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

"That's my baby!"

And before we had that beautiful
little girl, about a year before, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

And before we had that beautiful little girl, about a year b...

And I don't tell you that
to garner sympathy - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

And I don't tell you that to garner sympathy

I only tell you I had a miscarriage
because I have a microphone, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

I only tell you I had a miscarriage because I have a microph...

And maybe if we did talk
about these things, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

And maybe if we did talk about these things,

If this happens to you, because it happens
to three out of every ten women, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

If this happens to you, because it happens to three out of e...

You did nothing wrong.
You're not weird. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You did nothing wrong. You're not weird.

You certainly shouldn't
be prosecuted for it. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You certainly shouldn't be prosecuted for it.

But it wasn't until
I got pregnant that first time - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

But it wasn't until I got pregnant that first time

Prior to that, no one had ever
asked me about children - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Prior to that, no one had ever asked me about children

"Well, you'll just die
in a clown suit somewhere - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

"Well, you'll just die in a clown suit somewhere

Now, it's totally normal and innocuous
to ask a woman, "Do you have kids?" - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Now, it's totally normal and innocuous to ask a woman, ...

It's totally traditional for two humans
regardless of gender - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

It's totally traditional for two humans regardless of g...

...acquire smaller humans
that they then put in their home - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

...acquire smaller humans that they then put in their home

It's a little less traditional to be like, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

It's a little less traditional to be like,

However, you ask a woman,
"Do you have kids?" and she says no, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

However, you ask a woman, "Do you have kids?" and ...

"Do you want kids?" - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

"Do you want kids?"

She has her answer and she's thought
a lot about it, and it's personal to her, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

She has her answer and she's thought a lot about it, an...

Whatever the answer, I promise you
her answer is never that she forgot - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Whatever the answer, I promise you her answer is never that ...

Because, Cleveland, I think it speaks
to the constant conversations about women, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Because, Cleveland, I think it speaks to the constant conver...

Remember, there's a lot of people making
a lot of money off of you feeling bad - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Remember, there's a lot of people making a lot of money...

We don't have to make
this political, we already did, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

We don't have to make this political, we already did,

We'll talk about all the things
that we hear about this idea - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

We'll talk about all the things that we hear about this...

I understand if she's had several
children, it may not be that tight, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

I understand if she's had several children, it may not ...

It's tight enough for you
and your five inches of fury, okay? - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

It's tight enough for you and your five inches of fury,...

You're fine.
All right? You're gonna have a good time. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You're fine. All right? You're gonna have a good t...

This idea that it tastes like candy - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

This idea that it tastes like candy

At its finest, it might be, what,
a little metallic? - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

At its finest, it might be, what, a little metallic?

Girls are gonna feel bad
that it doesn't taste like candy, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Girls are gonna feel bad that it doesn't taste like can...

If he comes up from down there, like,
"Green apple Jolly Rancher," - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

If he comes up from down there, like, "Green apple Joll...

Then finally, this idea, the stigma, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Then finally, this idea, the stigma,

The vagina is self-cleaning. Okay? - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

The vagina is self-cleaning. Okay?

Yeah, there's a small chance you're sick
and you have to see a doctor, - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Yeah, there's a small chance you're sick and you h...

Yeah. I see you put it anywhere
just for funsies, yeah. - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Yeah. I see you put it anywhere just for funsies, yeah.

You don't need to put
a Glade plug-in, okay? - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

You don't need to put a Glade plug-in, okay?

Your vagina, Cleveland,
is like a rain forest - Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever

Your vagina, Cleveland, is like a rain forest

Iliza Shlesinger: Hot Forever poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Iliza Shlesinger talks about different topics. She starts from every girl's ugly bra to how all adult men need to own a box spring.

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: Steve Paley

Writer: N/A

Production: N/A

Genre: documentary, comedy

Year: 2022

MetaScore: N/A/100

ImdbRating: N/A

BoxOffice: N/A

Released: 11 Oct 2022

Awards: N/A

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