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Can you imagine how much of an asshole
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Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking

Can you imaginehow much of an asshole I would look likeif I turned up to my local park,...

Can you imagine
how much of an asshole I would look like
if I turned up to my local park, everyone else is chucking in
moldy bits of bread, I turn up with a basket of grapes?

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.072
Can you imagine how much of an asshole
00:00:03.008 --> 00:00:06.072
I would look like if I turned up to my local park,
00:00:06.008 --> 00:00:09.092
everyone else is chucking in moldy bits of bread,
00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.016
I turn up with a basket of grapes?
Duration
12 seconds
Views
27
Timestamp in Movie
00:23:25
Uploaded
May 27, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Jack Whitehall hits the stage with hilarious tales about happy couples, life in hotels, human stupidity and his well-traveled father.
"Oh, you may be ducks, but today you will feast like swans. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
"Oh, you may be ducks, but today you will feast like sw...
Don't fill up too much, you won't leave room for the cheese board. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:04
Don't fill up too much, you won't leave room for t...
Lie-dl's finest Latvian Camembert. Come, enjoy, enjoy." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:09
Lie-dl's finest Latvian Camembert. Come, enjoy, enjoy.&...
I can't keep up with the fad diets. There appears to be a new one every week. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
I can't keep up with the fad diets. There appears to be...
"Yeah, I'm doing the 5:2 diet. For five days, I eat what I like. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
"Yeah, I'm doing the 5:2 diet. For five days, I ea...
And for seven days, I tell everyone about it." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:09
And for seven days, I tell everyone about it."
It's like: "I have eyes in my head, I can see what's in front of me." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
It's like: "I have eyes in my head, I can see what...
It's absolutely amazing, you've got to try it sometime. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:04
It's absolutely amazing, you've got to try it some...
I haven't made saliva for three days." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:07
I haven't made saliva for three days."
"It's honestly the best I've ever felt." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:07
"It's honestly the best I've ever felt."
I mean, in six months' time, I will 100% be a vegan. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
I mean, in six months' time, I will 100% be a vegan.
I'm just jealous of people for living the life that I want to live. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:04
I'm just jealous of people for living the life that I w...
Now that my love-life is a car crash, - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
Now that my love-life is a car crash,
[audience cheers] - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:09
[audience cheers]
[in deep voice] "She happy." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
[in deep voice] "She happy."
I don't know whether they were husband and wife, - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
I don't know whether they were husband and wife,
'Cause there is nothing cringier - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:10
'Cause there is nothing cringier
I met this guy the other day. He was old. Like, old-old. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
I met this guy the other day. He was old. Like, old-old.
Like, you could have got into his iPhone - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
Like, you could have got into his iPhone
And he introduced me to the woman that he was with: "This is my girlfriend." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
And he introduced me to the woman that he was with: "Th...