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I haven't made saliva for three days.
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Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking

I haven't made saliva for three days." "What have you lost?""Two stone and my vision."

I haven't made saliva for three days." "What have you lost?"
"Two stone and my vision."

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.002
I haven't made saliva for three days."
00:00:04.048 --> 00:00:07.012
"What have you lost?" "Two stone and my vision."
Duration
7 seconds
Views
19
Timestamp in Movie
00:24:44
Uploaded
May 27, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Jack Whitehall hits the stage with hilarious tales about happy couples, life in hotels, human stupidity and his well-traveled father.
"It's honestly the best I've ever felt." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:07
"It's honestly the best I've ever felt."
I mean, in six months' time, I will 100% be a vegan. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
I mean, in six months' time, I will 100% be a vegan.
I'm just jealous of people for living the life that I want to live. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:04
I'm just jealous of people for living the life that I w...
Now that my love-life is a car crash, - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
Now that my love-life is a car crash,
[audience cheers] - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:09
[audience cheers]
[in deep voice] "She happy." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
[in deep voice] "She happy."
I don't know whether they were husband and wife, - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
I don't know whether they were husband and wife,
'Cause there is nothing cringier - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:10
'Cause there is nothing cringier
I met this guy the other day. He was old. Like, old-old. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
I met this guy the other day. He was old. Like, old-old.
Like, you could have got into his iPhone - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
Like, you could have got into his iPhone
And he introduced me to the woman that he was with: "This is my girlfriend." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
And he introduced me to the woman that he was with: "Th...
The husband sits down, instantly falls asleep, - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
The husband sits down, instantly falls asleep,
[snores loudly] - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:07
[snores loudly]
At one point he did that thing like he was choking in his sleep. Like... - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
At one point he did that thing like he was choking in his sl...
[choking, snorting] - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
[choking, snorting]
If he goes, he goes." - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:29
If he goes, he goes."
In doing so, she accidentally wakes him up, and he was not best pleased. - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:05
In doing so, she accidentally wakes him up, and he was not b...
He snapped at her. He was like: [snorts] "Oh, my God, - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:21
He snapped at her. He was like: [snorts] "Oh, my God,
[imitates static] "To the lady in row 33, you go, girl, you go!" - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
[imitates static] "To the lady in row 33, you go, girl,...
Other than me. I was thinking: - Jack Whitehall: I'm Only Joking 00:08
Other than me. I was thinking: